One of the top scoring links on Reddit today was that fun anecdote about how Thomas Jefferson wanted a new constitution every twenty years or so. I was bored, so I whipped up an admittedly ASB list that did just that. I have a few footnotes, but I'd like to remind everyone that this is explicitly unserious (as you'll see in the later lists
) so don't get too bent out of shape about it.
List of Presidents of the United States during the Second Republic (1787-1812)(1)
1.
George Washington (Independent-Virginia) 1789-97
2.
John Adams (Federalist-Massachusetts) 1797-1801
3.
Thomas Jefferson (Republican-Virginia) 1801-09
4.
James Madison (R-Virginia) 1809-12
List of Presidents of the United States during the Third Republic (1812-37)(2)
1.
James Madison (R-Virginia) 1812-16
2.
James Monroe (R-Virginia) 1816-24
3.
John Q. Adams (R-Massachusetts) 1824-28
4.
Andrew Jackson (Democratic-Tennessee) 1828-36
5.
Martin Van Buren (D-New York) 1836-37
List of Presidents of the United States during the Fourth Republic (1837-62)(3)
1.
Martin Van Buren (D-New York) 1837-41
2.
William Henry Harrison (Whig-Ohio) 1841(4)
John Tyler (Whig, then Independent-Virginia) 1841-43 (Acting)
3.
James K. Polk (D-Tennessee) 1843-47
4.
Zachary Taylor (W-Louisiana) 1847-50(5)
Millard Fillmore (W-New York) 1850-51 (Acting)
5.
Franklin Pierce (D-New Hampshire) 1851-55
6.
James Buchanan (D-Pennsylvania) 1855-59
7.
Abraham Lincoln (Republican-Illinois) 1859-62
List of Presidents of the United States under the Fifth Republic (1862-87)(6)
1.
Abraham Lincoln (R-Illinois) 1862-63(7)
Andrew Johnson (D-Tennessee) 1863-64 (Acting)
2.
Ulysses S. Grant (R-Illinois) 1864-72
3.
Samuel J. Tilden (D-New York) 1872-76
4.
James A. Garfield (R-Ohio) 1876(8)
Chester A. Arthur (R-New York) 1876 (Acting)
5.
Samuel J. Tilden (D-New York) 1876-80
6.
James G. Blaine (R-Maine) 1880-84
7.
S. Grover Cleveland (D-New York) 1884-87
List of Presidents of the United States under the Sixth Republic (1887-1912)(9)
1.
Benjamin Harrison (R-Indiana) 1887-1891(10)
Levi P. Morton (R-New York) 1891-92 (Acting)
2.
Levi P. Morton (R-New York) 1892-98
3.
William McKinley (R-Ohio) 1898-1904
4.
Alton Parker (D-New York) 1904-10
5.
William Howard Taft (R-Ohio) 1910-12
List of Presidents of the United States under the Seventh Republic (1912-37)(11)
1.
Theodore Roosevelt (R-New York) 1912-18
2.
Warren G. Harding (R-Ohio) 1918-24
3.
William G. McAdoo (D-California) 1924-30
4.
Newton Baker (D-Ohio) 1930-36
5.
John L. Lewis (Labor-Pennsylvania) 1936-37
List of First Secretaries of the United States under the Seventh Republic (1912-37)
1.
James Mann (R-Illinois) 1912-16
2.
Frederick Gillett (R-Massachusetts) 1916-22
3.
Finis Garrett (D-Tennessee) 1922-29
4.
John Nance Garner (D-Texas) 1929-32
5.
Paul J. Kvale (Labor-Minnesota) 1932-34
6.
Jo Byrns (D-Tennessee) 1934-36
7.
Paul J. Kvale (L-Minnesota) 1936-37
List of Presidents of the United States under the Eighth Republic (1937-62)(12)
1.
Smedley Butler (Independent-Pennsylvania) 1937-40(13)
William B. Bankhead (D-Tennessee) 1940 (Acting)(14)
Sam Rayburn (D-Texas) 1940 (Acting)
2.
Joseph P. Kennedy (D-Massachusetts) 1940-46
3.
Paul Robeson (L-New Jersey) 1946-52
4.
Frank Sinatra (L-New Jersey) 1952-58
5.
Marion M. Morrison (R-Iowa) 1958-62
List of First Secretaries of the United States under the Eighth Republic (1937-62)
1.
Paul J. Kvale (L-Minnesota) 1937
2.
William B. Bankhead (D-Tennessee) 1937-40(14)
3.
Sam Rayburn (D-Texas) 1940-46
4.
Vito Marcantonio (L-New York) 1946-52(15)
5.
Hubert Humphrey (L-Minnesota) 1952-54
6.
Sam Rayburn (D-Texas) 1954-60
7.
Malcolm Little (L-Platte) 1960-62
List of Presidents of the United States under the Ninth Republic (1962-87)(16)
1.
Edward R. Murrow (I-New York) 1962-65(17)
Malcolm Little (L-Platte) 1965-66 (Acting)
2.
John F. Kennedy (I-Massachusetts) 1966-72(18)
3.
John R. Cash (I-Tennessee) 1972-78(19)
4.
Fr. Robert F. Kennedy (I-New York) 1978-84(20)
5.
Ronald Reagan (I-California) 1984-87(21)
List of First Secretaries of the United States under the Ninth Republic (1962-87)
1.
Malcolm Little (L-Platte) 1962-68
2.
Tony Mazzocchi (L-New York) 1968-72
3.
John V. Lindsay (D-New York) 1972-80
4.
Angela Davis (L-Alabama) 1980-87
List of First Secretaries of the United States under the Tenth Republic (1987-2012)(22)
1.
Angela Davis (L-Alabama) 1987-88
2.
Avro Halberg (Communist-Minnesota) 1988-94
3.
Bert Sinatra (C-New Jersey) 1994-2002(23)
4.
George Paul (L-Kentucky) 2002-06(24)
5.
Lesane P. Crooks (C-California) 2006-10
6.
John F. Cena (L-Florida) 2010-12
List of Premiers of the United Workers' and Farmers' Council Republics of America (2012-)(25)
1.
John F. Cena (L-Florida) 2012-18
2.
Taylor Swift (C-Pennsylvania) 2018-
Footnotes:
1 The 'First Republic' refers to the United States under the Articles of Confederation.
2 The Constitution of 1812 would retain most of the features of the Constitution of 1787, although it also made a few crucial modifications to the workings of government. Drawn up by a Republican majority in the constitutional convention, it explicitly barred the Supreme Court from utilizing 'judicial review', mandated the election of the President and Vice President on a single ticket, banned the international slave trade, ended lifetime tenure for members of the Supreme Court, and gave the states the ability to nullify federal law if 2/3rds of the states concurred.
3 The Constitution of 1837 would be a major democratic advance in some areas, but an outright retrogression in others. For starters, citizenship would now be constitutionally limited to whites only, a definite retrogression. But on the flipside, universal white male suffrage was ensured at age 21, and all property restrictions on voting and holding office were definitively wiped out. The controversial nullification provision of the 1812 Constitution was removed after some wrangling. The President would now be elected by popular vote, as well. Slavery was explicitly protected in areas where it already existed.
4 Died in office. As per the Constitution of 1837, Vice President John Tyler became
Acting President and a new election was scheduled to fill the vacancy in 1842.
5 Died in office.
6 The Constitution of 1862 was the greatest single advance for democracy in the United States up to that point. Suffrage was according to all men over 21, regardless of race, and all persons, regardless of color or race, were declared citizens. Slavery was explicitly prohibited, and the federal government empowered to raise an income tax for the first time.
7 Assassinated.
8 Assassinated.
9 The Constitution of 1887 held the line on most of the democratic advances of 1837 and 1862. The President was limited to a single, six year term as a result of this constitution, and the federal government was explicitly given the power to regulate commerce. Civil service reforms were also enshrined into the U.S. Constitution.
10 Assassinated.
11 The Constitution of 1912 saw another democratic advance. The Presidency was weakened and forced into a power-sharing agreement with the House, which henceforth gained control of the cabinet and would be headed by a 'First Secretary', modeled on the British Prime Minister. The Presidential veto was done away with and transferred to the Senate, but modified so as to be a suspensive veto, unless all members of the Senate concurred, in which case a piece of legislation could be vetoed outright. Initiatives, referendums, and recall were implemented at the federal level as well.
12 The Constitution of 1937 reflected the growing strength of organized labor and the democratic struggle ongoing in the United States. The Presidency was stripped of virtually all its powers, the position of Vice President abolished (in the event of a presidential death, the First Secretary would serve as acting President), and the power to elect the President transferred from the public to both the House and Senate, provided they could agree to elect a person with a 2/3rds vote in each, effectively rendering the spot a ceremonial one for noncontroversial figures who could act as 'promoter-in-chief' of the nation abroad and for foreign dignitaries. The House was also empowered to override Senatorial absolute vetoes, which were weakened. A referendum was required for any use of military force, and in the House, state districts were replaced with statewide at-large elections for all representatives. Lifetime tenure on the Supreme Court was replaced with a single term of 12 years, and all lower level judges were made electable.
13 Died in office.
14 Died in office.
15 Deposed in an intra-party coup. Marcantonio was viewed by many within the Labor Party as being 'too close to Paris' (the center of the European Federation of Workers' and Farmers' Council Republics, or EFWFCR) and was replaced by center-right Laborite Hubert Humphrey, a change that was also reflected in the election of Frank Sinatra to the Presidency.
16 The Ninth Republic would represent another great democratic advance. The Presidency was made officially nonpartisan, while the Senate was abolished and the House given its powers. The Supreme Court was opened up to election, and the rights of sexual and racial minorities were given greater protections under the law.
17 Died in office.
18 An investigative journalist whose nomination for President nonetheless sparked controversy owing to his being the son of a previous President.
19 In a surprising move, the Democratic-controlled Congress nominated noted conservative Laborite and folksinger John Cash for President in an attempt to win back sections of the working class it had lost over the past decade to the growing Labor Party.
20 Controversial in part because he was a Kennedy and in part because he was a sitting Roman Catholic priest.
21 The nomination of a prominent member of the Communist Party and beloved actor for the Presidency would spark heated debate when former Communist Angela Davis announced Reagan as her pick for President in 1984.
22 The Constitution of 1987 abolished the Presidency, reduced the term of judges from 12 years to six, and introduced proportional representation in the House of Representatives, which was renamed the National Assembly. It likewise created 'citizen oversight councils' with the ability to monitor bureaucracies, hold politicians to account, and veto legislation.
23 Fictional person. Albert 'Bert' Sinatra is the child of former President Frank Sinatra and former First Lady Billie Holiday Sinatra.
24 George Paul, noted libertarian socialist, is the son of former Labor Party Congressman Ron Paul, also a noted libertarian socialist. He's named after Henry George.
25 With a historic agreement between Labor Party leader John Cena and Communist leader Dwayne "The Boulder" Johnson, the constitutional convention of 2012 voted unanimously to transfer all organs of state power to workers' and farmers' councils, which had gradually absorbed more state power over the years since the rise to prominence of the Labor and Communist parties. While there was some resistance to this from members of the capitalist class, said resistance was more or less dealt with when the Communist and Labor party paramilitaries (dubbed 'the People's Champions' by Johnson) intervened to ensure a swift transfer of power to the councils.