Chapter 2: Reaching For The Stars
Post from the Shadow Yarns Net-Log by Henry Phipps Jr.[1]
When I joined the Skeleton Crew in early-2001, it was a big time for the company. Tim had convinced the Disney board to let the Crew buy a controlling interest in themselves - becoming a private company, not just a Disney subsidiary who occasionally did contract work to other studios.
And Tim was shifting into the role of patron at this point - basically, giving guys like myself, Eli Roth, Michael Dougherty, and Scott Derrickson the leg-up that Jim Henson and Steve Spielberg had given him.
Case in point? My first job was as a costume designer on 2004's The Space Between Us. Yeah, I know – it’s a hell of a thing to start on.
Basically this as a feature-length movie in 2004 done by Tim Burton (and set in America instead of Britain)
The story began in 2000, where Tim was looking through his previous artworks, when he saw a drawing he had made of a young girl standing in a snowy clearing. Now the weird thing was that Tim couldn’t remember when he’d made the drawing or why… all he knew is he wanted to make it into a film.
So, based on the image, Tim and Caroline Thompson wrote a story that was basically Jonathan Scissorhands with the genders reversed, about a young alien girl who crashes on Earth and falls in love with a young human boy… and since Jonathan Scissorhands was, technically, a Beauty and the Beast story, that’s what Space Between Us and Disney’s Medusa have in common if you’re ever on the Christmas quiz.
For the plot-critical role of Sky, we got up-and-coming Spanish child actress Ivana Baquero, who was cast on the recommendation of Arkham head honcho Richard Stanley, a friend/friendly rival of Tim’s who was working with her on the Spanish horror film The Intruder[2], who was emphatic that she would be the best for the part. Apparently, Richard explicitly told Tim, “This role was made for Ivana - if you do not cast her in this role, I will view it as a travesty.”
Tim took him on his word and – despite the fact he can neither speak nor read Spanish – watched The Intruder. Apparently, Ivana’s performance moved him to tears – especially the scenes where she wasn’t saying anything.
For the role of Nathan, our other main protagonist, we did chemistry tests with Ivana – like they’d done on the Marvel stuff (on advice of Tim’s friend Sam Raimi) – and we ended up with Freddie Highmore, whose performance as the young Tony Stark in Iron Man had impressed Tim. For Lucy, Nathan’s older sister, we cast Scarlett Johansson and for her boyfriend Tad, we got Chris Evans - Scarlett and Chris had great chemistry (and Chris’ performance led to Tad being considerably rewritten, but we’ll get to that).
For Nathan and Lucy’s mother Karen, we got Winona Ryder and for the Area 51 agent Agent Sharpe, the film’s heavy, we got Tim’s favourite horse in the stable, River Phoenix. (The amusing irony of this was not lost on a lot of people – given the film was meant as a spiritual successor to Scissorhands). And, of course, we had Conan’s Sarah Williams (who would later join the Skeleton Crew full-time) as breakout character Robin, Lucy’s best friend who quickly became a fan favourite with her punk-rock demeanour and rather foul (or as foul as a T-rating can get you anyway) mouth.
Many of Tim's frequent production collaborators served as the crew - in particular, Danny Elfman co-composed the score, with the help of an up-and-coming young composer by the name of Michael Giacchino, who'd mostly been working on TV and video games.
Anyway, I’d have thought you’d know the story, but in case you have Marla’s attention span, here’s the plot summary for you.
The film opens with a UFO above Earth undergoing some… technical difficulties – necessitating a portion to be detached from the ship, as two transport pods fall out and enter the atmosphere. We then focus on one of the pods as it crashes into a snowy clearing and a young girl, Sky, gets out of one of the pods, disoriented.
Now, in the film, we don’t get much of an indication as to where Sky actually came from – however, Tim had an idea of her backstory, which we put detailed hints of in her costuming. For, instance, the jumpsuit she’s wearing is deliberately designed to resemble a concentration camp uniform, there’s a tattoo on her arm with an identifying number (a cross between a Holocaust camp number and a cattle brand) and her hair’s been shaved.
Basically, the implication Tim wanted is that the UFO we see in the opening sequence (which was pretty beaten-up) was some kind of smugglers’ ship – and it was trafficking Sky. We don’t see the smugglers – or see them get their comeuppance – because they’re an incidental part of the narrative. Some of their cargo fell off their ship and they just kept on going and doing their usual shit.
Nervously scanning her surroundings, the girl is terrified by the movements and noises of a creature in the forest around her - we don’t see it, but it’s clearly huge. Walking through Milford Haven, scared, confused and disoriented, she uses her telekinesis to steal a chocolate bar from a convenience store… before darting away. This really played to Ivana’s strengths as an actress – in this whole sequence, until the convenience store cashier says “What?”, there is not a line of dialogue.
We then meet Nathan – our other protagonist. In the opening sequence, we establish a lot of facts about his life – his dad ran out on the family years ago, and then died – and he’s been brought up by his mom, Karen, and his older sister Lucy. He’s a shy, artistic kid who gets picked on a lot in school – a fact that most of the people working on the film could attest to! – and doesn’t really have many friends.
One night, on the run from bullies whilst walking home from school, he hides in an alley and finds Sky hiding in a dumpster. Finding out that Sky has telekinetic powers, Nathan takes her to his house, secretly hiding her in his family’s garage – the two have a brief, touching scene where they try and get through the communication barrier.
However, another creature has come with Sky to Earth… and has begun causing havoc. The creature, which we called the “Titanosquid”, was basically described as “an octopus trying to be an elephant” and was designed with input from Dougal Dixon (who was working with NBC and Tim Haines’ Fantasticalia on an After Man series) and Wayne Barlowe (who the Skeleton crew had previously worked with on John Carter) – Tim wanted it to look like it’s playing by some biological or evolutionary rules on some world… just not ours.
Pretty much this (image from The Future is Wild: A Natural History)
The creature went through a number of revisions – there were versions where it was reptilian, insectoid, crustacean-like, before a cephalopod look was settled on when Tim read an article that stated that cephalopods – especially octopi – are considered an ideal model for studying what extra-terrestrial life might be like. It was Dougal’s idea to make it an herbivore – because large herbivores, like hippos, buffalo and elephants (hell, even your average farmyard bull) can be more dangerous, in many ways than carnivores.
We deliberately tried to portray it as simply a large, panicked animal in an unfamiliar environment, rather than anything evil or monstrous. One of my favourite scenes with it is when it’s silently moving around the woods near Milford Haven, scanning the air nervously at its surroundings, in a deliberate echo to Sky walking through Milford Haven earlier, both are hesitant, confused and even a little fearful about the big, strange, scary new world they have found themselves in.
The idea Tim had was that it was either a pet of the slavers or something that they were smuggling alongside Sky… and that they hadn’t treated it terribly well. So we deliberately covered it with scars, gave it a sort of dirty, ill-treated look and based a lot of its behaviours on abused animals, particularly abused performing elephants. One particularly heart-breaking parallel were the things around its legs and “arm tentacles” – the idea is that these were broken energy chains, based on a rather cruel “training” method used on baby elephants.
Area 51’s Agent Sharpe (River Phoenix), assigned with tracking down the creature, finds out about Sky when the convenience store cashier who saw Sky lift away the chocolate bar, offhandedly talks about “some weird girl” who could lift things with her mind… around about the time the creature was first sighted. Thinking they are connected (which is semi-correct) – and that finding Sky is the way to finding the creature (which isn’t correct) – he sets out in search of the girl.
Originally, Agent Sharpe (who was originally written as a surly, jaded police chief, before the choice was made to add Area 51 into the story) was a much more abrasive, cynical and no-nonsense character – however, once we got River, he became a bit cockier and more charming. The idea was to not portray him as a villain – he’s merely a guy trying to do his job.
Meanwhile, Lucy, confused and worried at her little brother’s strange behaviour, is taken by her boyfriend Tad and best friend Robin to a party at Tad’s house, which backs off into the woods. Walking off into the forest to get some fresh air, she ends up encountering the Titanosquid – when she tells Tad and Robin about it, they find it difficult to believe… before they are shown the Titanosquid’s footprints… in which case they find it significantly less difficult to believe. They are then met by Agent Sharpe, who asks them a number of rather probing questions about the creature.
Originally, Tad was a far more unsympathetic character – he’d be the standard “jerk jock boyfriend” who’d be a bit of a bully to Nathan and attempt to force himself on Lucy at the party. And, of course, he’d also be killed by the Titanosquid at the end. But obviously, when we got Chris Evans, the character became more charming and likeable and Tim found himself giving him more of an arc. Tim has always been pretty open that this changed the film for the better – in retrospect, the way it was originally was too similar to Alicia and Jim in Scissorhands.
Confused, the teenagers head back to Lucy’s house, where they (and Karen) find Nathan and Sky. After they’re brought up to speed, they make a plan to bring Sky home… just as Agent Sharpe shows up. Karen lies to distract Agent Sharpe, giving Nathan and the others time to escape in Tad’s car. It is then Sharpe, exasperated, reveals he’s not after Sky… he’s after something else and shows her a picture of the Titanosquid. Since Sky lifted his car and smashed it, Karen, reluctantly, gives him a ride (with the two bickering all the while), whilst he calls for reinforcements from Area 51.
Meanwhile, Nathan, Sky, Lucy, Tad and Robin use some spare Christmas lights, combined with the distress call on Sky’s pod, to make a light array – however, unbeknownst to them, they’re attracting the smugglers’ ship… who aren’t probably going to be too keen on witnesses when they arrive to take back what’s theirs. In addition, the lights attract the Titanosquid… and Agent Sharpe, Karen and the Area 51 team arrive shortly after it.
Whilst Agent Sharpe’s team manage to subdue the creature, Sky stops them from killing it, telling Agent Sharpe, “He was lost and scared – like me.” Ultimately deciding to stay on Earth, Sky switches off the array, causing the smugglers’ ship – unable to locate them – to leave. As the ship leaves, Karen and Agent Sharpe have a semi-flirtatious exchange (after Winona and River, who are married in real life, were cast) – and he offers to give his superiors the Titanosquid (under the promise that he will make sure that it is treated well) and “pretend he never saw” Sky… to which Karen asks if he could fast-track them some adoption papers.
In a big deviation from Scissorhands, it doesn’t end with Nathan and Sky being separated, like Jonathan and Alicia – partly because Tim has come to find the implications of the ending of Scissorhands (if people reject you, the only thing to do is to cut yourself off from the outside world) a bit creepy and partly because this is the story of an abused girl finding a family who loves her. It was divisive among critics – some viewed it as touching, whilst others viewed it as a bit of a cop-out.
We came out in Christmas 2004 to universal acclaim - the critics loved us, with Ebert calling it Tim’s “most emotional and immediate film since Jonathan Scissorhands” (which Tim would disagree with – he views all his films as emotional and immediate). We ended up making over $500 million globally – and to this day, it’s one of the most viewed Christmas films on DisneyDirect. Whilst Oscar success proved evasive, the Saturns loved us.
The film is also notable for other reasons – it’s the last live-action film that Tim’s first and greatest patron Jim Henson ever greenlit as CCO, with, of course, Bart & Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure as the last animated film. As Tim has told me multiple times in the almost (ohmygodhasitreallybeen) 20 years since, Jim’s always said that that one-two-punch is a hell of a note to end a two-decade tenure on.
With The Intruder, Space Between Us and Roger ‘N’ Me three years later, Ivana was blasted into super-stardom, suddenly the breakout young talent that we all knew that she could be. The press was already calling her “the new Winona Ryder” – fortunately, Winona herself and Scarlett, who’d also hit big at a young age with Annie, were there to navigate her through the sudden pressures of young fame.
As for me, I was ready for my next challenge...
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[1] – Fictional person – basically the Terrell of the Skeleton Crew, in terms of his role in the TL story thread. Credit to @Ophois for his inclusion.
[2] – Other fictional person – credit to @LordYam for her inclusion. You might have seen her in the Conan post… and you’ll be seeing a couple of ShadowYarns posts from her shortly.
[3] – Fictional Spanish horror film – stay tuned for details on that one! And, if you forgot who Arkham were, they're Richard Stanley and Johnny Depp's production company. You might remember them from the Camp Productions post - Arkham's one delve into animation, Jimmy Rango, was a collab with Camp.
[4] – Sort of think the Megasquid from OTL!Future Is Wild – as for the After Man series, you're going to see more on that, too.
[5] – You might have seen this one in the Disney's Millennium Age post - more details coming soon!
Chapter 8: A Tale of Two Lisas (...cont'd) Excerpt from The Bongo Beat: The Odd Journey of Matt Groening by Nathanial "Nate" Reptorr
Now, a Nuclear Family movie had long been on the agenda for Groening and co., even before George RR Martin had come to Groening and Wayward with the story of a girl and her dragon. The special Escape From Camp Deadly had grown out of a treatment for a movie, as had some of the Halloween specials. And, as previously stated, a Nuclear Family movie had been Groening’s main ace up his sleeve in his plans to get Oakley and Weinstein’s treatment for The Ice Dragon made – most studios would be eager to be distributing Bart, Lisa and Maggie’s big-screen debut, and, if The Ice Dragon were to flop, the almost guaranteed success of a Nuclear Family movie would cushion the blow.
Whilst many stories were passed around – from the Earth being invaded by recurring aliens Kang and Kodos’ species to a Fantasia-style collection of shorts[1], ultimately, up-and-coming Bongo writers Dan Povenmire and Jeff “Swampy” Marsh, asked to co-write and Povenmire to direct after Groening was impressed by their work on both Bartman and the special Bart & Lisa’s Haunted Mansion (and who would go on to greater and greater things… read on[2]) came up with a time travel storyline, with the siblings slalomed throughout history after stealing a malfunctioning time machine, encountering (and annoying) various historical figures and hoping that the next leap… will be the leap home.
However, the film hit one massive stumble early on – Bongo weren’t quite set up to make a feature, with their longest productions being the 44-minute Nuclear Family Halloween specials. According to Groening, “Right from the beginning we knew we’d need a lot more studio space and animation teams to get the movie off the ground, whilst doing all our TV work. Whilst the size of our operation had increased pretty quickly in a few years… we knew we’d need to really up the ante if we were going to get the movie done and looking good”.
Bongo, with Disney’s financial assistance, bought extra studio space in Santa Monica and temporarily incorporated some Disney TV animation staff – some of whom had previously worked on Bart & Lisa’s Haunted Mansion and several of whom would join Bongo permanently – to increase staff numbers, enabling Povenmire and Marsh to spin off a team to work on the film (with Jay Stephens taking over as showrunner on Bartman). These early production delays (or “pulling everything together” as Povenmire later put it) would gradually push the planned late 2003 release date into summer 2004 (Raptor Red ended up taking the original release spot… which makes a scene later on in the film doubly hilarious).
According to Povenmire, the extra manpower helped with both the grand scope they were planning and the quality of the film’s animation, “On any given episode of the show, we’d have to pick and choose which sequences we could lavish our attention on… in the movie, we could do that for every single scene.” And it certainly shows – the movie used a far wider colour palette than the show, the characters have shadows throughout the movie (a technique used sparingly in the show) and certain sequences (for instance, Bart, Lisa and Maggie flying Da Vinci’s flying machine over Renaissance Florence) could be animated more fluidly than would ever be possible before. Bongo animation directors Mike B. Anderson, Lauren MacMullen, Rich Moore and Steven D. Moore each directed the animation for a quarter of the scenes, under Povenmire’s supervision.
According to Povenmire, playing with time travel was an entertaining prospect. “From the very earliest conversation we had about the movie, we had the idea of going to more than one location –we really wanted to do sort of a tour, a travelogue to a bunch of different kinds of places, mostly because we really wanted to see Bart, Lisa and Maggie meeting Cleopatra or da Vinci. Whilst of course we looked at things like Bill and Ted, Doctor Who, Back to the Future, one of the key inspirations was, actually, Mr. Peabody and Sherman.”
A cameo from the dog-and-his-boy duo had even been scripted, owing to many of the Bongo crew (including executive producer Matt Groening) being Jay Ward fans, but was ultimately cut (much o their consternation) due to possible legal issues with Warner Bros, who had recently acquired Jay Ward Productions and were working on a Mr Peabody and Sherman movie, which would be (in what most are sure was a complete coincidence, given the new boss at Warner Bros[3]) releasing at roughly the same time.
And finding the right destinations – from Ancient Egypt to Renaissance Italy – was key to telling the story, as Marsh recalls, “It was about finding the right places and how to tell the story – we really wanted to convey the idea that human nature doesn’t really change and history is its story. Basically, the great figures of history weren’t exceptional people – they were just people, with the same foibles as us. It wasn’t just picking the funniest places… well, it was a bit.”
By nature, the film was stuffed to the gills with cameos from famous historical figures – with everyone from Boudicca to Catherine the Great to Robert Oppenheimer appearing (and being annoyed by) Bart, Lisa and Maggie in their madcap voyage across time and space. According to Povenmire, “Often the thought process was about what historical figure would be the most interesting to include, once we had decided on what locations we’d be featuring. We did a lot of research and put a lot of obscure people in along with the famous ones – we were most kids’ first introduction to Count Caligostro, for one.”
Among the most unusual of these cameos was one from within the Disney family - the titular character of Raptor Red, which had been released the year before. Red appears in a brief scene when Bart, Lisa and Maggie end up in dinosaur times and are met by the titular Utahraptor – which quickly segues to Maggie, in a PG-rated “aren’t you going to ravish me” gag, ending up angry that the increasingly befuddled Red isn’t going to eat her. This gag met the approval of Raptor Red author (and executive producer on the Disney/Amblimation film) Robert Bakker who, reportedly, “laughed himself breathless” watching the sequence.
Another notable cameo, this time from within the Bongo family, was Bartman villain Master Mind (once again voiced by Corey Burton), who appeared as the Skynet-esque ruler of a dystopian future caused by the siblings’ meddling in history, with Mr. Burns as the benefactor of a human resistance against the tyrannical AI.
His appearance, according to Povenmire, tied into a theme common to time-travel stories that the film had to tackle, “We really wanted to convey the idea that there are very specific rules to time travel and that, if you break those rules, bad things happen. It’s been done so commonly in time travel stories – and obviously we had to do it in a way that didn’t end up giving audiences a headache trying to work out all the paradoxes. So Bart, Lisa and Maggie meddling in history – by accident or design – and coming back to this dystopian future enabled us to insert that concept into the story in a way that didn’t break up the rest of the film.”
Whilst Burns as the benefactor/leader of a resistance movement remained consistent, who exactly would be ruling this dystopian future and what form it would take, went through multiple permutations. As Povenmire recalls, “We thought it would be funnier if the dystopian overlord was somebody we knew – and we went through a lot of candidates. At one point, the overlord was Flanders who was ruling this sort of Stepford Wives thing[4], where you had to be happy all the time or you’d be lobotomised, simply because of the ludicrousness of the juxtaposition of Flanders as an Orwellian overlord. However, we ultimately picked Master Mind, obvious Terminator homage aside, pretty much because we always thought he was a great character on Bartman.”
According to Povenmire, they didn’t need to go far for inspiration or this sequence, “We cannibalised elements from a Bartman script that we’d written, but ultimately never got produced, where, through a time-travel accident, Bart ended up accidentally creating a future where Master Mind had taken over. Obviously, since this was Nuclear Family, not Bartman, we made it a bit more comedic, but…”
Bart, Lisa and Maggie actresses Nancy Cartwright, Yeardley Smith and Jude Barsi, all having done voice acting for feature film, were all eager to reprise their characters for a movie, as Barsi recalls, “When I found out we were getting a movie, I thought ‘It’s about fucking time!’ Pun intended.” Recording their dialogue together, as they had done in the series, they improvised a lot of their lines, as Povenmire recalls “We all knew that when you get Nancy, Yeardley and Jude in a room together, they’ll be ad-libbing for days. When they’re recording together, they make a bit of a game out of it to try each take several times with the unspoken agreement that they’re just going to go further next time. By the end of each session, the whole crew are just pissing themselves laughing.”
“There was one scene where Bart, Lisa and Maggie end up witnessing the fall of Troy and Maggie goes ‘Just goes to show you should beware of Greeks bearing gifts’ – your basic historical in-joke. They decided to take that line and run with it. So by around take four, you had Jude as Maggie saying, ‘Tale as old as time – you meet a charming Greek guy, he gives you a gift, you let him penetrate your walls… then the Trojan breaks and seamen come pouring out.’
“… and then Nancy as Bart said ‘Woah! I was just gonna say ‘beware of Greeks bearing gifts’, but you… you went there! Can we even say that?!’
“… and then Jude replied with a ‘Weeelll, we just did…’
“And the whole crew is just rolling on the floor laughing.”
And, in grand NF tradition, Cartwright, Smith and Barsi were rubbing shoulders with a seemingly endless list of celebrity cameos, many of whom were playing real historical figures - these included Scarlett Johansson as a spoiled Cleopatra, Tom Hanks voicing his third cousin-quadrice-removed Abraham Lincoln, Derek Jacobi as a prissy Leonardo da Vinci and Joan Jett as a hard-rockin’ Boudicca. A cameo from Walt Disney was briefly considered, as a bit of biting-the-hand-humour, but was ultimately decided against.
What’s even more remarkable is nearly every guest star was Povenmire and Marsh’s first choice to play the characters, to which executive producer Groening credited to how far the show had come in its popularity, “In the early days of the show, we used to have to ring guest stars we wanted and beg them to do the show… for Bart & Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure, they were calling us.”
However, some had conditions, as Povenmire recounts, “We originally had Derek [Jacobi] as William Shakespeare – however, Derek asked if he could play somebody else, since he’s a supporter of a theory that states that William Shakespeare did not write the plays and that somebody else did[5]. So we put him in as da Vinci instead… and that gave us the scene where Bart, Lisa and Maggie steal Da Vinci’s flying machine and end up flying over Florence.”
However, the king of the cameos was, without a doubt, Tim Curry[6], playing the infamous occultist Count Alessandro di Caligostro as a PG-rated Dr. Frank-n-Furter with all the flamboyant scenery-chewing that implied. In a bonus for the adults in the audience, there were several explicit references to The Rocky Horror Picture Show in the sequence – in particular, Caligostro’s butler is voiced by Richard O’Brien and portrayed as a pastiche of Riff-Raff.
According to Povenmire, they had written the Count in with Curry in mind, “We found out about Count Caligostro during our research and thought that he seemed like a really fun guy to include. And since Jeff and I are big Rocky Horror fans, we wrote him as basically Frank… well, obviously as close to Frank as we could get on a PG-rating. It was at that point we thought ‘it would be so awesome if we could actually get Tim Curry to play this character’ – fortunately, we did.”
You see, in a bit of serendipitous timing, Curry was on site that day recording audio pickups for his part as Oberon the Goblin King on Bartman. Once he had finished recording, Povenmire and Marsh asked him if he could voice Count Caligostro – and, according to Povenmire, not only did Curry say “yes with remarkable speed”, he even put them in touch with Richard O’Brien so they could cast him as Caligostro’s butler.
Aware that they were writing for a series that basically had obscure jokes aimed at the nerds in the audience as a key pillar of its humour, Povenmire and Marsh wrote the script with several jokes aimed specifically for any historians who may have been watching. For example, in the scene where Bart, Lisa and Maggie are trolling Martin Luther by dressing up as angels (long history), Maggie says, after Bart’s “95 feces” joke, “And speaking of which… He wants to tell you that it’s meant to go out of that hole at the back, not in the one at the front!”, a joke based on Luther’s long-suspected coprophagy. Marsh chuckles, “In our research, we found out that Martin Luther ate a spoonful of his own crap every morning… so we made a joke out of that. Basically, we made a piece of toilet humour out of a little-known historical fact – basically encapsulating that unique mixture of highbrow and lowbrow that makes Nuclear Family what it is… You’d almost think these things were thought through.”
Released on June 10th, 2004 (with a premiere in Springfield, Illinois – the winner of a competition from the many US cities of that name), Bart & Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure was a box-office hit, grossing almost $600 million worldwide[7], ending up as the most successful Disney animated film since The Lion King and 2004’s highest-grossing animated film, steamrolling most of its competition. The song "Back In Time", written specifically for the film by the UK pop-punk band The Termites[8] was a chart-topper.
Critically, the film was mostly positively received, with Roger Ebert describing it as “an enjoyably deranged time-travel romp that should entertain young and old alike”. It was nominated for Best Animated Feature at the 2005 Oscars, but ultimately lost to The Further Life Of Toys – however, Bart, Lisa and Maggie did host NBC’s coverage of the Oscars. The film did gangbusters on home media and remains a popular direct-view title to this day.
The film remains popular among animation fans and is often cited as the one case where ‘television IP brought to the big-screen’ was good, with Animation Nation later writing, “Normally, ‘big-screen version of television IP’ movies are words enough to strike terror into anyone’s heart – the Hanna-Barbera films of the 90’s, which were (with few exceptions) so-so at best and dreadful at worst, abundantly proved that. However, most animation fans (except those purists who insist – loudly – that Groening ‘sold out’ after Bunyans) would agree that Bart & Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure represents an honourable exception – a television IP movie that keeps the show’s unique qualities, without feeling like something that really should have been released straight-to-video.”
With the film’s success, Bongo demonstrated that they were the up-and-coming players on the feature film block. In the same article, Animation Nation wrote, “You wouldn’t think it, but Bart & Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure was actually quite the hat-trick for Bongo – even with a dynamite IP like Nuclear Family, a studio’s feature debut done by an untested director ending up as Disney’s biggest commercial success since The Lion King is something that sounds too amazing to be true. This was enough to prove that Bongo were a studio to keep an eye on”.
The film has become very popular with history teachers in the almost two decades since its release, with teachers often showing scenes from the film, often to introduce kids to obscure historical figures. With a fond smile, Barsi says, “My son came home from school a few days ago and told me that they’d shown one of the scenes from Bart and Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure in his history class. I just thought ‘Wow’ – I’ve done something constructive.’”
The film is also significant for another reason – it is the last animated film that Jim Henson greenlit as Disney CCO (with The Space Between Us being the last live-action film[8]), which, as the man has acknowledged multiple times in the almost two decades since, is a hell of a note to end a career spanning almost two-decades on.
And, with the film’s success Bongo knew where they wanted to go next. Before the film a five-minute short called A Flight With Appa played. The short, co-storyboarded and directed by Bongo up-and-comers Michael Dante DiMartino and Bryan Konietzko[9], which depicted three kids seeing a polar landscape from the back of an enormous flying bison set to a cover of Walking in the Air, charmed audiences with its beautiful, Ghibli-esque visuals. Roughly a month later, Groening would reveal at Comic-Con that the short had only been a teaser for a show called Avatar, which Groening promised would be “Bongo’s biggest work yet”.
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[1] - These were both suggestions for a Simpsons movie OTL - the former ended up as the episode "The Man Who Came to Be Dinner", whilst the latter was apparently, Groening's initial idea for the '07 movie.
[2] - More on these to come!
[3] - This is, of course, Jeffrey Katzenberg - who, as you probably know, ended up as Chairman/CEO of WB. The release of Mr. Peabody and Sherman is partly Katz's old "dueling" strategy - and WB Animation acquiring Jay Ward Productions is because (out-of-universe) Disney and Universal had "all the good shit" when it came to animated IPs. (I mean there's going to be a future post which explores the two's relationship as the "Big Fish" of feature animation, but...).
[4] - This is was very nearly the case when I was writing this. I decided to use a Bartman villain for some Bongo Brand synergy.
[5] – This is actually true OTL - he did the introduction for Roland Emmerich's Anonymous (which is, in my view, a terrible, terrible movie) for that exact reason.
[6] - Hat-tip to my dad here - who's a big Rocky Horror fan and who I can well imagine laughing his ass off, whilst the TTL versions of me and my sister (7 and 8 at the time) look at him in confusion. In addition, Povenmire and Marsh are apparently big Rocky Horror fans OTL - that's why Richard O'Brien voiced... Richard in Phineas and Ferb.
[7] – Slightly better than the OTL Simpsons movie. Couple of reasons for this – the first reason is it’s being distributed by Walt Disney Feature Animation, so there's obviously greater name value. The second reason is that, rather than being the cause of a brief cultural renaissance, as the OTL Simpsons movie, Bart & Lisa’s Not-So-Excellent Adventure is the culmination of it. Here, Disney have spent the past several years making NF their “hot new IP” (sort of what Disney are doing with OTL Simpsons now), which will be explored in a future post.
[8] - Believe it or not, that's not a fictional band - they're known iOTL as Busted. Their cover of "The Power of Love" by Huey Lewis and the News also appears on the soundtrack.
[9] - And that's the reason why this is paired with The Space Between Us post- yup, this was a classic, @Geekhis Khan-ian pairing. Both of these are the last two films greenlit by Jim in his tenure as Chairman/CCO - the last live-action film and the last animated film respectively. They are, tonally, light and day from each other.... and yet are both pure Jim Henson in their own ways.
[10] - You might have seen him mentioned in the Bongo Studios post and as doing The Ice Dragon. As for Avatar... more to come on this!
In Brief: Misc. New York Times Movie Reviews 2004-2022
The Last Voyage of the Demeter (2004) The legend of Dracula gets fresh blood in this moody, if uneven nautical chiller[1]; ⭐⭐½
Tomb Raider: (2007) Charismatic newcomer Hayley Atwell stars as globe-trotting archeologist Lara Croft in this exciting, if unoriginal action flick based on the hit video game; ⭐⭐
Richard and Howard: (2012) A heartfelt and moving Jim Henson-produced documentary focusing on Muppeteer Richard Hunt and composer Howard Ashman, and also chronicling their final film work on Mort and The Song of Susan[2]; ⭐⭐⭐⭐
The Man from U.N.C.L.E.: (2015) Matthew Vaughn directs the exemplary double act of Chris Pine and Anton Yelchin, in this enjoyably camp adaptation of the 60s spy classic; ⭐⭐⭐
Curse of the Gill-Man: (2015) A documentary from Jon Schnepp, covering the infamously troubled 1998 remake of Creature from the Black Lagoon[3]; ⭐⭐⭐
Election: (2016) Adam McKay directs this amusing, yet gripping biopic about the 2012 Presidential election between Kathleen Sebelius (Allison Janney) and Jeb Bush (John Goodman)[4]; ⭐⭐⭐½
Hellspawn: (2018): Lance Reddick is a revelation in James Gunn’s visceral and visually stunning take on the demonic comic book anti-hero[5]; ⭐⭐½
Killing Cleverly: (2022) Genre legend Bruce Campbell narrates this groovy doc on the history of the Smart Slasher, featuring interviews with some of Horror’s greatest filmmakers; ⭐⭐⭐½
[1] Here the film doesn't go through the two-decades of development hell, as in OTL. The film is directed by Robert Schwentke as originally intended, and becomes a cult classic. I'm undecided on casting for this, so I'll probably return to it later.
[2] The film receives an Oscar nomination for Best Documentary Feature Film.
[3] Similar to the OTL docs Lost Soul: The Doomed Journey of Richard Stanley’s Island of Dr. Moreau, (which also covers a troubled horror remake) and Schnepp's The Death of “Superman Lives”: What Happened? (which focused on Tim Burton’s attempted Death of Superman adaptation, starring Nicolas Cage).
[4] Similar in style and tone to McKay's OTL film Vice. Janney and Goodman receive Oscar nominations for their performances, with Janney winning.
[5] In addition to Reddick as Al Simmons, the cast includes Michael Rooker as the Clown, Steve Agee as Sam and Sean Gunn as Twitch.
So A Class Clown and a British Wizard Board a Plane: The Secret Origins of Captain Underpants and Dav Pilkey’s Career From the “Kind of a Lot O’ Comics” Netsite by Ian K. Painters, August 25, 2014
(By @TheMolluskLingers, @MNM041, and @Plateosaurus)
Dav Pilkey has, in the last decade or thereabouts, gained himself quite the reputation in the comics industry and DC Comics in particular for very good reason: his stylized, cartoon-influenced drawing style, as well as his witty dialogue and narration that hides satirical wit beneath a veneer of Japanese tokusatsu and silly superheroic action not seen since the Silver Age heyday of Stan Lee or Mort Weisinger, and most “controversially”, a penchant for gross-out humor. Now as his signature comic series Captain Underpants (published under DC imprint America’s Best Comics)[1] releases its final and 144th issue “Whatever Happened to the Waistband Warrior?”, let’s take a look at how a former children’s book author came to be known as the “Clown Prince of Comics'' and how that led to not only his titular Waistband Warrior, but runs on Shazam! and Justice League of America that remain cult classics amongst comic fans, and more recently news that he’ll be taking the reins on Wonder Woman in collaboration with Grant Morrison. By his own admission, his career path has partly been down to some very good luck, through a chance encounter that he had with someone you would not expect: esoteric British comic book writer Alan Moore. It would seem rather incongruous for a crude kid’s writer from Ohio and a deep and serious Midlands-born writer to not only collaborate let alone also be close friends, but Pilkey revealed how it happened in an interview in 2003.
"I remember I was going on vacation to the UK in 1995, and Alan just ended up sitting next to me on the plane. I don't know why I decided to strike up a conversation with him, but I did and he was a lot friendlier than I think his reputation would lead some to believe." At the time, Pilkey was already seeing fairly moderate success as a children’s author, most notably with his Dragon and Dumb Bunnies books. However, he had also been struggling to get a particular passion project of his off the ground: Captain Underpants, a character Dav had created as a second grader in the early 1970s. “Not many publishers were enthused by the concept,” Pilkey recalls. "I ended up showing some of my drawings to Alan while we were on the plane, and I distinctly remember his eyes lighting up with that kinda mad genius’ glint that only a rare few have seen up close. And he says to me, [Pilkey does a self-admittedly terrible impression] ‘Dav mate, that’s a modern Superduperman!’ and I was like ‘Wait, you mean that MAD comic’? For those not aware, this was a particularly famous MAD magazine story from the 50’s taking the p*** out of Superman, treating him as a disgusting jerk rather than a noble morally righteous hero. Of course, I’m an avid reader and eventual writer of MAD, but believe it or not, Moore took a lot of influence from it writing Watchmen of all things as he confirmed right after." From there, Moore and Pilkey began discussing the comics they grew up with as children and found they shared a love of older comics like those DC and Marvel published in the 60s and 70s. The ideas for what would become the first Captain Underpants issue would further spring from those discussions, like the monster-man “The Inedible Hunk”, a dual parody of the Hulk and Moore’s take on Swamp Thing and the villain Dr. Diaper. The cast was further rounded out with characters Pilkey had also come up with in his childhood such as Dog Man and Water Man; even after Pilkey returned to the States, he and Moore would keep correspondence.
"It was certainly a surreal experience, I mean the guy who made Watchmen was taking interest in a joke story I had started on in the second grade. That was what resulted in me getting my foot in the door at DC." Eventually, Alan Moore would start an imprint under DC for creator-owned properties, America’s Best Comics, with Captain Underpants becoming one of its first titles. The series was not an immediate sales success but quickly gained a reputation through word of mouth; more specifically, the comics’ reliance on gross-out humor made it near-instantaneously controversial amongst more conservative readers and parents, something Pilkey expected based on personal experience but Moore was perplexed by, perhaps because in comparison to some of the content he himself had written in the past, the bathroom humor was a nonissue. “I am by no means a bible thumping moral guardian, quite the opposite in fact,” Moore elaborated when we reached out for comment during research for this article. ‘But I find such people to be absolute hypocrites when it comes to what they object to their children consuming; for f****’s sake, you consider lions shagging on the Discovery Channel to be ‘educational’ or ‘wholesome’ but when little Barbara makes poop and pee jokes with her friends in primary school, she gets bloody suspended!” Both Moore and Pilkey, under the Marvel Bullpen-esque nomenclatures “Affable Al” and “Dangerous Dav”, would take further potshots at such criticisms in Captain Underpants’ letters section. Such banter, and the vaudevillian contrast between the “grumpy old man” Affable Al and the exuberant, hyperactive Dangerous Dav in their responses to readers, would go on to become an iconic part of the comic, so much so that it's become a part of most of their collaborations.
The comic itself centered around two troublemaking young boys, Jamie and Eric, who make life difficult for the already child-hating staff of the elementary school they attend. After the school's principal, Mr. Krupp, threatens to separate the two lifelong friends, the solution to their problem comes in the form of a ring designed to hypnotize people. After hypnotizing Mr. Krupp, the two decide to have some fun and turn him into a superhero they created known as Captain Underpants. Only one problem, it ended up working too well and he ends up jumping out the window to fight crime. Now whenever someone snaps their fingers, Harold Krupp transforms from a disgruntled elementary school principal into the kind-hearted but bumbling do-gooder Captain Underpants and only returns to normal after being splashed with water. The comic follows a fairly standard formula from there of Jamie, Eric, and Captain Underpants getting into new and oftentimes bizarre situations, often with the awareness that they are indeed in a comic book (though the Captain himself only gains this awareness later on in the books story); the humor, despite what some readers claim, isn’t solely centered on bodily functions - a lot of it tends to be centered on playing with comic book cliches and conventions, ranging from Jamie and Eric arguing with the narration boxes to Captain Underpants briefly undergoing a “Dark Age” phase; complete with a bland-name Nerf gun, wearing hot dogs strapped to his body as a stand in for bandoliers and smoking (exploding) cigars. There's even a joke where, once Captain Underpants also gains the ability to break the fourth wall, he ends up stretching out the panels, so he and the bad guy can have a proper fight. This naturally resulted in Captain Underpants being compared to characters who similarly lampoon these tropes such as Ambush Bug and the Tick (both of whom are characters The Captain has met). Over the course of the series, an entire superhero universe starts popping up in the Captain’s wake, ranging from the repurposed public domain heroes of Nedor Comics like Tom “Doc” Strange[2] to the silly like the Captain Marvel spoof Shazbot, named for a common exclamation of Robin Williams’ Mork and The Three Sciency Guys that parody both the Three Stooges and the Fantastic Four. Just as well, as the universe itself expands, so do the main trio’s personalities - Jamie and Eric mature into still fun-loving but responsible kids while Mr. Krupp not only defrosts into a warmer-hearted character (hinting that the Captain persona isn’t just a hypnosis-induced act) but seeks to fix the environment of child abuse at the school, even going to bat for Jamie and Eric on multiple occasions.
There would even be a few spin-offs that Pilkey would have a hand in writing, such as the Dogcop, a cop story with an anthropomorphic dog, and the time travel martial arts story The Adventures of Uuga and Chacha[3]. There was also his Monstermania series that expanded upon two picture books he had written previously where photographed pets terrorized a city of Dav’s mice, albeit with miniature model people replacing them. The latter even got a TV adaptation on Amerikids which actually used the same techniques just applied to filming.
The Captain Underpants character would grow in popularity over the years, even getting a crossover with Superman, where the character looks hilariously out of place due to still being drawn in Dav Pilkey's art style while everyone else is drawn in a realistic style. Additionally, the Captain would make cameos in other America’s Best Comics works like the Alan Moore-written Tom Strange and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. The comic’s cult fanbase would pay off when Pilkey got an opportunity to work with characters from DC’s main universe; his first was with Superman, creating a satirical one-shot called Superman: The CIA Award For Excellence In Journalism, wherein Clark Kent is being hunted by CIA agents who are trying to kill him and make it look like an accident, but not because they know he’s Superman, but because he’s too good of a journalist. True to Pilkey’s previous works, Clark is comically oblivious to the attempts on his life. His next project would be relaunching both Krypto the Superdog and giving minor characters Space Canine Patrol their own series, lovingly spoofing Franco-Belgian sci fi comics like Valerian.
Pikley would later do runs on two more of DC’s more mainstream works: Shazam and Justice League of America; he would be paired with Peter Krause for the former and Howard Porter for the latter. Both would arguably be Dav Pilkey’s first forays into relatively more “serious” comics[4], especially JLA; both wouldn’t be devoid of humor, however, as they were still throwbacks to the Golden and Silver Ages albeit more “self-aware” for lack of a better term. One of Pilkey’s first times writing for the A-lister heroes would be DC's Superman Unlimited series, which would serve as a springboard for Pilkey’s non-Captain Underpants trademarks at the company, such as reconstructing the pre-Crisis status quo (bringing back the Kara Zor-El Supergirl, returning Superman to Weisinger era power levels) and exploring the more obscure parts of comics history.
However, Pilkey actually briefly took a hiatus from writing the series from 2007 to 2008, during which he was a full-time caregiver for his ailing father. During this period, Pilkey temporarily handed over the reins to other friends he had made in the industry, including Grant Morrison and Kevin Smith. While readership did decline during this period, with many people saying that Morrison and Smith never fully got a hang on the tone of the book, both of them have said that they would do it again in a heartbeat. The death of his father would haunt Pilkey upon his return to the comic book industry. Nevertheless, Pilkey would soon. He credits dabbling in ceremonial magic and eventually converting to Thelema thanks to Moore’s influence. “Thelema is about, and these are basically Alan’s words on the subject “to strive to ascend to higher states of existence, uniting oneself with higher powers, and understanding and embracing one's True Will, their ultimate purpose, and place in life.” Pilkey would say. “And for me, it was that realization that magic and art are the same thing that helped me understand that True Will.”
DC would not also be his only foray: Pilkey in the 2000’s on both sides of his hiatus would head to Dark Horse, Marvel, and even MAD for other ventures; the second saw work on the Doctor Strange Presents a Series of Peculiar Pictographs[5] The Amazing Spider-Man and a brief revival of obscure 1970s character Rocket Raccoon, the latter being a satire of 1950s “space ranger” serials such as Captain Video (Pilkey was aware of any similarities to Space Canine Patrol and differentiated it via a far campier tone on par with 1980’s Flash Gordon).
For Dark Horse in particular, Pilkey try his hand at writing titles like The Mask to relatively mixed success, but more importantly would create a new series illustrated (and partially written) by up-and-comer Kazu Kibuishi that was easily his most popular work outside of his DC triad: Strangor, which told the story of a suburban family who inadvertently get transported to the fantasy world of 13-year old son Mark after his nasty younger brother gets the amateur comic he was working on wrecked, and have to retrieve the pages scattered across the land to keep it from being destroyed. He described it as a semi-humorous subversion of fantasy stories where outcast kids dismissed by their family get transported to fantasy worlds; “But instead, it's the family that just doesn’t understand him who gets that, while the kid himself remains in our world in a coma”. He even found time for a return to kids’ picture books, such as with a revival of his Dragon series and Always There, which tackled Dav’s own ADHD and Dyslexia.
Strangor's not quite this, but has elements of it (and not just with its illustrator).
Still, after his run at Dark Horse, Pilkey later returned to DC Comics for runs with both Doom Patrol and Suicide Squad. During both runs, Pilkey ended up breathing new life into obscure and forgotten characters including: Brother Power the Geek, Kite Man, Lord Death Man, Ultra The Multi-Alien, General Glory, Doctor Occult, Atomic Knights, Super-Hip, Peacemaker, King Tut, Snowflame, The Eraser, Matter-Eater Lad, Heckler, Moonbow, Funky Flashman, The Black Pirate, General Glory, Pigeon Person, Slam Bradley, and the Zoo Crew[6]. The versions of the characters have continued to appear in comics to this day.
Pilkey’s sudden success in the comics industry would in turn affect his personal life: he and Alan Moore would become close personal friends (even religion as mentioned above) and the two of them would surprisingly bring in two others into their friend group - Jo Rowling and Neil Gaiman, the latter of whom already knew Moore. The former would be introduced to Moore and Pilkey via a small argument the duo had over Moore’s dislike of the Harry Fletcher novels; as Pilkey recalls, it turned out Moore hadn’t even read them - his dislike stemmed from what fans tend to call “hype backlash” having seen them advertised and discussed almost everywhere.
“I said to him, ‘Al, how can you not like these books if you’ve never even read them?” Pilkey would elaborate. “It was basically a Green Eggs and Ham type thing.” Moore gave into Dav’s admitted pestering, and while he didn't think they were good overall, he did find things to like in them. “They’re certainly not groundbreaking,” Moore would later explain. “But I do like them from a magical standpoint and how they explore some very Hermetic themes.” They would inspire the creation of Moore’s 2007 series of novels Heka, aimed at younger readers (for him) and following the Ancient Egypt-set adventures of a young orphan boy who becomes a magician’s apprentice. Illustrated by Rick Veitch with in-universe comic books (or as Moore and Pilkey insist, “picto-papyri”) created by the main protagonist (illustrated by Pilkey in a style best described as how a 10-year-old boy of the time would draw hieroglyphics), the books blended and explored the history of popular art, the Western magical tradition, and mythology. A semi-successor would be Strange Tales, an anthology about the odder myths of various world mythologies and the cultural context behind them. As for Rowling herself, she actually would take some of Moore’s criticism to heart, admitting that she actually had many of them in mind when she later wrote books within the same world as the Harry Fletcher novels.
Rowling's works also inspired Pilkey's own Magical Misfits series, which was written for Dark Horse comics in collaboration with Brennan Lee Mulligan[7]. A John Hughes-inspired parody of the Harry Fletcher novels that features four American exchange students being sent to a school that is very clearly Hogwarts with the serial numbers filed off. Pilkey and Mulligan always acknowledge the inspiration for the story, with Mulligan even mentioning that Pilkey called Rowling to tell her about the idea, apparently wanting to clear it with her first, similar to what Weird Al does with his parody songs.
"I found the idea funny as Dav explained it to me, but I think the moment I was fully sold on it was when he mentioned the character of Evan, whose character is kind of built around the idea that he's supposed to be the prophesized Dark Lord, the He-Who-Must-Not-Be named if you will, and Evan just keeps refusing to go along with it. It's a simple idea but they both handled it brilliantly," Rowling recalled from Pilkey's pitch during a 2012 interview.
Meanwhile, Gaiman and Pilkey clicked much more quickly, despite the very different tones of their works, with the two of them both being lovers of old-school comic books, and both of them having tendencies to bring obscure characters in their works, which led to the two of them collaborating multiple times throughout the years, most prominently with the 2010 graphic novel Bo Gey, about a bogeyman who doesn’t want to join his family in scaring children, and Howl, about coyotes in a post-apocalyptic America. And coming back to Captain Underpants, Gaiman is actually writing an ongoing story within the same universe which sends up old silver age comics, which revolves around the grandparents of Jaime and Eric, who were revealed to be retired heroes.
Looking back on its issues, Pilkey’s Mighty in the Tighty Whiteys has certainly proven to stand the tests of time over the years and has been one of the flagship books for America's Best Comics for the longest time. While Pilkey has confirmed that the ending of the comic will very likely not be the last time we hear from Eric, Jamie, and the good Captain, it does put a close on one chapter in the career of quite possibly one of the most interesting men currently working in the comic industry.
As for future projects like the aforementioned Wonder Woman run, Pilkey has given only a few hints as to where he and Morrison will take the Princess of the Amazons. “It’s going to be my first mature work, with none of my usual humor.” he says. “I already explored some pretty heavy themes with the character of Diana on my JLA run like her coming to terms with her pansexuality and what her nature as a modern Galatea really means. I want my take on her series to be an expansion of that.” In addition Pilkey is also considering a graphic novel adaptation of Kenneth Anger’s Lucifer Rising and a story for Alan Moore’s own Cinema Purgatorio, intended as both a tribute to his favorite movie monster ever, Godzilla, and a dissertation on that character’s roots in the Japanese atomic bombings and Cold War era fears of nuclear devastation; they are also collaborating once again on a biographical comic of Fredric Wertham and the creation of the comics code.
Whatever he comes up with next, Dav Pilkey will certainly leave audiences amazed - and no doubt at the same time chuckle too.
[1] Captain Underpants is not a chapter book series ITTL, rather being a comic book series (something Pilkey experimented with in early drafts for the first book IOTL) published by America’s Best Comics, here an imprint of DC’s from the start that specializes in creator-owned properties separate from the DCU.
[2] As opposed to OTL’s Tom Strong, which did feature this character as an alternate universe counterpart of the titular Tom.
[3] Unlike it's OTL counterpart, this version doesn't contain unintentionally offensive stereotypes of Asian Americans, with the character of Master Wong in particular just looking like Mr. Miyagi.
[4] But not serious works period: in both OTL and TTL in the mid-1990’s, he made some serious paper books The Paperboy and God bless the Gargoyles. Pilkey’s runs on Shazam and JLA will be a make-or-break moment for him in the comics industry in order to prove he can be more than just “the underwear and fart jokes guy”.
[5] Credit to @GrahamB for the idea.
[6] You probably think the writers made at least some of those up, but to quote The Lego Batman Movie, "Nope! All real. Probably worth a Google."
[7] Brennan's mom is actually a comic book writer, and while he still becomes a comedian, here he also decided to follow in her footsteps, using connections he forged through his friendship with Michael Kaluta.
In Brief: Misc. New York Times Movie Reviews 2002-2023
Gucci: A House Divided: (2002) Martin Scorsese and an all-star cast bring us this release about the family behind the Italian fashion empire[1];⭐⭐
The Quatermass Experiment: (2002) David Cronenberg delivers an unnerving and handsomely produced update of the groundbreaking sci-fi classic, with Ian Holm powerfully playing the titular scientist; ⭐⭐⭐
Caves of Steel: (2003) The Phoenix brothers lead this visually stunning, yet narratively meandering adaptation of Isaac Asimov’s forgotten sci-fi whodunnit[2]; ⭐½
The Night Stalker: (2004) John Goodman stars in this update of the cult TV series that inspired The X Files; ⭐⭐½
Macdeath: (2008) A comedic "smart slasher" about the supposed curse surrounding the Scottish Play[3]; ⭐⭐
Lincoln: (2012) Steven Spielberg delivers a rousing take on an American icon, anchored by a phenomenal performance from Christopher Reeve[4]; ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Black Dog: (2018): Bruce Campbell delivers his finest performance in this chilling, yet heart-wrenching indie horror-drama[5]; ⭐⭐½
Etrigan: (2021): Andy Serkis portrays a sadistic rhyming demon, and his troubled human alter-ego in this gloriously unhinged adaptation of the DC Comics character; ⭐⭐⭐
In the Heat of the Night: (2023) Don Cheadle and Jeff Daniels star in this well-acted, but unnecessary remake of the Poitier-Steiger classic; ⭐½
[1] Based on an unrealised OTL project. I’ve left specifics and casting vague so that others can expand on it if they want.
[2] River plays Elijah "Lije" Baley, while Joaquin is R. Daneel Olivaw.
[3] Here, saying the name results in the characters being hunted and slaughtered by a deranged, stereotypical Scotsman (Robbie Coltrane), complete with kilt and bagpipes.
[4] Reeve walks away with the Oscar for Best Actor, as Daniel Day Lewis did in the OTL version.
[5] Campbell plays a mild mannered businessman dealing with the aftermath of a mysterious and traumatic incident, and who starts being followed by a menacing hound, which only he can see. The film will receive some flak for it’s well meaning, but problematic presentation of mental health, and muddled allegories. Despite this, Campbell’s performance will be widely praised, and he will even get some brief Oscar buzz, ultimately winning the Independent Spirit Award for Best Male Lead.
2003: Enter The Dragon!
Excerpt from Kaiju Kingdom! A Brief History of Massive Movie Monsters, by Gogota “Go” Jira
The Production:
With the success of 1997's Godzilla, Universal and Toho were keen to continue collaborating – then-Universal CCO Jeff Katzenberg and Toho’s Shogo Tomiyama, in a joint press conference, announced a Godzilla trilogy – the first sequel of which, Godzilla 2, came out in 2000 to financial and critical success. Renny Harlin would be back as director, whilst John August and Ben Edlund, who’d co-written John Carter and the Princess of Mars, would be hired to write the script.
Armed with the foreknowledge that there would be a third film, Harlin and Godzilla 2 screenwriter John Logan inserted several plot points in Godzilla 2 that would set the third film up – most notably the introduction of Dr. Lorelei “Lori” Andrews and Mechagodzilla’s developing sentience being tied to the use of an organic brain, which would later be revealed to be Ghidorah-derived.
For the third film, Harlin, August and Edlund had a central aim, as Edlund recalls, “We wanted to go deeper into the history of Godzilla – and the Godzillas as a whole. Saperstein, in the first movie, states that Godzilla’s the last of his kind – we wanted to go deeper into that history in Godzilla 3. This Godzilla clearly had a mother and a father and maybe brothers and sisters at some point, but they’re all dead – what happened to them? Why is Godzilla the last of his kind?”
When the time came to divvy up monsters, Universal CCO-in-training Majorie Cohn (following the advice of her semi-mentor Jeff Katzenberg) was quick to earmark Mothra and King Ghidorah – however, plans to feature a revived Mechagodzilla – this time on the KDF’s side - ended up falling by the wayside due to Toho’s use of the character in a duology of films, meaning that the far more obscure Toho mecha MOGUERA (whose most notable prior appearance had been in Godzilla vs. Xenilla[1]) ended up replacing him.
These aside, several original Kaiju would make cameos in the film – the most notable of these was, of course, Zilla[1], star of the Honolulu opening sequence. Designed as a distant evolutionary cousin to Godzilla, adapted for speed instead of power, (described in the script as “the cheetah to Godzilla’s lion”), his name in the script was just “Speedy” before Jack Black came up with the name “Zilla” on set – principally because the actors couldn’t say “Speedy” with a straight face – and the name stuck.
Of all the Kaiju cameoing in the film, Zilla quickly became a breakout character, for his memorable design, putting up a surprisingly good fight against MOGUERA and being part of a compelling opening sequence – he and the Broodmother would eventually join the Toho Kaiju canon.
Desiring to add more fantasy elements to the film, as opposed to the science-fiction of previous instalments, Harlin, August and Edlund hit the idea of a Kaiju-worshipping apocalypse cult being the human antagonists early on, wanting to contrast Wilkins’ corporate militarism and anti-Kaiju agenda. The character of Gregory Pickersgill – originally scripted as a former Catholic priest – was created to act as a contrast to Wilkins, being a twistedly pro-Kaiju religious fanatic.
Originally, like Lori, Pickersgill would also be having visions – only sent from Ghidorah, who would have been manipulating Pickersgill and his cult towards awakening him. In a tragic irony, Pickersgill would have truly believed that the Kaiju were sent by God to restore natural harmony to the world (in accordance with his twisted, syncretic belief system) and that his actions would have aided in that goal… but unbeknownst to him, rather than doing the work of any benevolent high power, he was actually being manipulated to serve the destructive agenda of a malevolent one.
However, Universal executives balked at the potential anti-religious themes, in addition to fears the introduction of more mystical story elements would confuse audiences (Harlin, August and Edlund have been vague whether they got a request from the Universal execs to “cut the New Age crap”), and ordered the removal of any reference to the character having a background as a priest. This had the side-effect of making the character rather more one-dimensional than Harlin, August and Edlund had originally conceived.
But, of course, Pickersgill’s portrayal was merely a single aspect of the multiple revisions Ghidorah and his portrayal went through – in the end, Ghidorah was made the last of a species that had arrived on Earth during the Plio-Pleistocene and warred with the Godzillas. This proved contentious with the fans, as will be mentioned later.
His design was also changed too, becoming a semi-horizontal, bird-like biped with bats, flying squirrels and vultures looked at. As a side effect of this semi-horizontal posture (and shorter, digitigrade legs), Ghidorah is also slightly shorter than Godzilla. Cobras were used as reference for the movements of Ghidorah’s heads - plans to give the heads individual personalities were ultimately trimmed down due to time constraints. A push was made for Ghidorah’s facial features to vaguely resemble Godzilla’s, to create an idea of convergence between the two species.
Mothra’s portrayal was revised too – the mystical aspects of her were ultimately downplayed or left ambiguous and a backstory of her species having a symbiotic relationship with the Godzillas was added (making her “the cleaner wrasse to Godzilla’s shark”, according to creature designer Crash McCreery). The eyespots on Mothra’s wings were designed to resemble Godzilla’s eyes to reflect this symbiosis.
Her design went through significant overhauls compared to the Toho version, due to Harlin, August and Edlund’s desire to not make Mothra look “cute” – she was made more streamlined, with real moths, grasshoppers, dragonflies and hornets looked at for reference, with hooked, praying mantis-like forelimbs and a wasp-like stinger. According to Patrick Tautopoulous, her lead designer, Mothra had to look “elegant and divine and beautiful… but still able to fuck you up.”
A particularly bizarre case of studio meddling came comparatively late on in production when executives mandated that Harlin, August and Edlund had to set a portion of the film in Sicily. Initially confused, Harlin, August and Edlund looked at their mythology books and found that, according to Greek myth, Typhon, progenitor of most of the Greek monsters and archenemy of Zeus, was imprisoned under Mount Etna – so the location of Ghidorah’s prison was changed from the Arctic to Mount Etna.
Despite what you might have heard, this was not because one of the production executives wanted to buy a house there, but out of political reasons. You see, in the wake of the Italian economic crash[2], support for Sicilian nationalism (among other Italian separatist movements) was at a record high, due to a public perception that the central government had ignored the plight of those regions “so a bunch of Roman bankers could cover their own arses”, to quote one particularly fiery denunciation. To encourage economic growth through tourism, the Italian government offered film studios financial incentives to shoot films in the country. It worked, somewhat.
The Story:
The film opens with a prologue set during the end of the last Ice Age, where paleo-Indians in Alaska watch as a Godzilla engages in a pitched, violent battle with a very familiar looking three-headed, golden Kaiju – the Godzilla manages to kill it, but dies of its wounds in the process.
Three years after the Mechagodzilla incident, the Kaiju Defence Force has grown, becoming a full-on global organisation – and with new funding comes new toys… such as MOGUERA. The film opens with the KDF in action in Honolulu, trying to drive off a Kaiju named Zilla – fortunately, they succeed in driving Zilla off with a minimum of collateral damage.
The KDF are also monitoring a Kaiju worshipping cult named “the Talons of God”, led by Gregory Pickersgill (Dermot Morgan) a former Catholic priest who believe that the Kaiju are punishments from God to show His displeasure with our behaviour – in particular, our defiance of the natural order. Ben Wasserman (John Stamos) and Larry Morton (Jack Black) find that Pickersgill has secretly obtained some of Wilkins’ transmitters (which ended up in the black market)… which he could use to either attract or awaken a Kaiju. They also find out that Pickersgill and his cult are headed to Sicily for some reason.
Meanwhile, Dr. Lori Andrews (Jennifer Aniston) notes an irregularity in Zilla’s movement patterns – almost acting like an animal fleeing its territory. Comparing them to all non-Godzilla kaiju known to the KDF (Anguirus and Rodan get explicitly namedropped), she comes to one conclusion – the Kaiju are all fleeing something…. she then gets a vision of the battle seen in the prologue and a warning – “The devil has three heads”. After the vision, she looks at Godzilla’s movement patterns to find… he’s heading for Sicily too. After comparing notes, Ben, Larry and Lori take their respective information to Dr. Henry Saperstein (Steve Buscemi), the head of the KDF – Saperstein, based on the evidence, decides to follow Godzilla.
Arriving in Sicily, the KDF corner Pickersgill at Mount Etna, having set up a series of Wilkins’ transmitters around the volcano. In a rant, Pickersgill gives his true motives - since Godzilla would not give humanity its much-deserved punishment, he has decided to find a Kaiju who would. And ancient sources revealed said Kaiju – an equal and opposite force to Godzilla who was defeated by him a long time ago and sealed under Mount Etna. At the end of his rant, he gives its name; Ghidorah. The Golden Demise.
Pickersgill then reveals he has already set off the transmitters – and Ghidorah awakens. Killing Pickersgill and his cultists, Ghidorah fights Godzilla in the Mediterranean, with Godzilla managing to gain the upper hand and grab one of Ghidorah’s heads…. before Ghidorah detaches the head like a lizard’s tail, regrowing it in a manner of seconds, and mauls Godzilla to near death, before going on a rampage across the globe.
Trying to work out a way to defeat Ghidorah, with Godzilla seemingly dead, Lori notes a similarity between the tissue of Mechagodzilla’s “brain” and the brain of the Ghidorah head[3]. Searching an abandoned lab formerly owned by the deceased Senator Wilkins, they find a severed, semi-vivisected, yet somehow still alive, Ghidorah head, missing a chunk of its brain. Putting the creature out of its misery by switching off its life support systems, Andrews is then beset by another vision – guiding her to a temple in the Central American Jungle.
Saperstein, Andrews, Wasserman and Morton head to the abandoned temple where they find who has (implicitly) been giving Andrews her visions – Mothra, the legendary Queen of the Monsters. At Mothra’s temple, the true story is given – coming to Earth as an invasive species in millennia past, the Ghidorahs fought a long and brutal war with the Godzillas (implicitly causing the Plio-Pleistocene boundary extinction event)… and Godzilla and Ghidorah are the last ones standing.
With Mothra’s help, they locate Godzilla, seriously injured and healing, in a graveyard of his kind and the Ghidorahs – however, Ghidorah has followed them, seemingly aware of what they are trying to do. Using a nuclear warhead, Saperstein sacrifices himself to heal Godzilla whilst MOGUERA keeps Ghidorah occupied. When a revitalised Godzilla emerges, Ghidorah retreats, with Godzilla in pursuit – and the boneyard is destroyed.
All paths converge in Washington DC – Godzilla duels Ghidorah, with the aid of the KDF, Moguera and Mothra. In the battle, MOGUERA is near-destroyed and Mothra is killed, but Godzilla manages to kill Ghidorah by forcing his central mouth open and frying his internal organs with his atomic breath. As Godzilla, a millennia-long interspecies vendetta finally complete, returns to the sea and the heroes watch, a recording from Saperstein ends the film, talking about humanity’s shared history with Kaiju – and how we have to coexist and protect the planet we all share.
The Acting:
The humans of the film are a slight improvement from its predecessor. Most of the cast from the last film are back and do a pretty good job, with John Stamos and Jack Black as Ben Wasserman and Larry Morton having wonderful interplay, even if their presence is slightly unnecessary. Whilst Stamos has been pushed to the background slightly, Black gets rather more (although less than Godzilla 2) – his firm and unwavering faith and admiration of Godzilla and the Kaiju, as opposed to his horror and disgust at Ghidorah for nearly killing Godzilla (proving that even the most pro-Kaiju guy doesn’t like the three-headed bastard), provides good foundation for some of the more emotional moments of the film.
As opposed to her mostly unnecessary role in the second film, Jennifer Aniston gets significantly more to do as Dr. Lorelei "Lori" Andrews. Of all the characters, it is she who gets the most focus – receiving visons from Mothra and ultimately playing a crucial role in the defeat of King Ghidorah. Imbuing her character with a surprising depth, Aniston conveys her character’s role as Mothra’s mouthpiece perfectly.
An against-type Dermot Morgan is chilling as Gregory Pickersgill, the founder of a Kaiju apocalypse cult and the film’s human villain, managing to alternate between fatherly Irish priest and deranged, fanatical nihilist[4] to an almost terrifying degree. Whilst Ghidorah doesn’t appear until roughly a third of the way into the film, Pickersgill certainly isn’t a bad understudy.
However, as usual, it is Steve Buscemi's Dr. Saperstein who steals the show. Once again serving as the pro-Kaiju mouthpiece of the film, Saperstein gets rather more to do this time round than just delivering expository monologues – in particular, his tear-jerking sacrifice to save Godzilla. Buscemi performs every line of his with surprising dignity and conviction, maintaining gravitas even when the content is a tad cheesy. A particular stand-out is his closing speech, played on a recording as Godzilla returns to the sea:
"Y’know, in some legends, the world begins with a war of the gods, with the (or a) world being created as a consequence. In others, the war happens at the end of time - Ragnarok, Armageddon. I believe both – and neither – versions are true. By which I mean, creation and destruction are forces that exist not in opposition, but harmony – they are but two sides of the same coin. The gods war, a new world rises – the new world becomes old… and the cycle repeats again. And in our legends, our forgotten history, there is one ultimate truth – when darkness rises, light will rise to dispel it. Their fates and ours are intertwined and we must live on this world together - as well as protect it from threats both within and without – if we are to survive.”
The Themes
Now, Godzilla 3 serves as an in-spirit remake of 1964's Ghidorah: The Three-Headed Monster. The two films have an identical premise – Ghidorah rises and proves a much greater threat than any Earth-based Kaiju, with Mothra in a prominent role and humanity eventually being forced to ally with Godzilla to defeat him[5].
There are several important differences, however. The most notable difference is in Ghidorah’s portrayal – rather than a singular entity, Ghidorah is portrayed as the last member of a whole species (like Godzilla himself), who came to Earth in the Plio-Pleistocene boundary and quickly established themselves as an invasive species, fighting a long, brutal interspecies war with the Godzillas… and Godzilla and Ghidorah are the last ones standing.
In addition, Ghidorah is portrayed as far more nuanced than most of his previous or subsequent incarnations – like a real invasive species, the Ghidorahs were only destructive because they were in an environment in which they were not native. There’s a scene where he’s in the Godzilla/Ghidorah graveyard and briefly turns over a jawbone of a dead member of his kind, like an elephant who’s come upon the remains of a dead herd mate.
In addition, there’s a twist to the whole “invaders using Ghidorah as their main weapon” plot device that has been rather common – and tiresome – in Godzilla media. Who, if anyone, seeded the Ghidorahs on Earth in the first place – and whether it was deliberate or accidental – is left intentionally vague… because it does not particularly matter. For all anyone knows they are long, long dead – it is what they left behind that matters.
The Release:
Godzilla 3 debuted at Grauman’s Chinese Theater on June 20th and received a wide release on June 23rd 2003, opening at the # 1 slot, knocking Four off the top spot … before being knocked off itself two weeks later by Reign of the Supermen. It would eventually gross almost $500 million worldwide on an $100 million budget, being the second-highest-grossing film that summer (after Reign of the Supermen).
Despite out-performing its predecessor, its critical reception was rather more mixed, with critics citing it as an improvement over its predecessor, praising the effects, performances (with Aniston earning particular praise), and action sequences, but criticising certain aspects of the storyline and the lack of resolution on certain plot points. Roger Ebert said, “Godzilla 3, whilst not terrible by any stretch of the imagination, overpromises and, ultimately, underdelivers – for the resolution to a trilogy, it’s certainly an anticlimax”. Despite this mixed reception, it was nominated for Best Visual Effects at the 2004 Oscars but lost to Dr. Strange.
Whilst fans enjoyed the film overall, some disliked that the film had not fulfilled its promise into a deeper exploration into the backstory of the Godzillas, whilst others viewed the film as too crammed and that the series could have been stretched out into four or five instalments. The changes to Ghidorah – making him part of a species (and his enmity with Godzilla far less personal) and his comparatively reduced power level – proved to be particularly contentious among fans, some thinking that they turned Godzilla’s greatest foe into just another Kaiju whilst others thought them an interesting twist that made the character stand out whilst remaining true to the roots[5].
Pickersgill actor Dermot Morgan, whilst enjoying the film overall, was a little dismayed that the nuance he had intended for his character got erased in rewrites. Reflecting on the film in 2013 for its tenth anniversary he said, “Godzilla 3 was a bittersweet experience for me. Whilst I’ll defend it to this day – it’s a very spectacular-looking film and it was tremendous fun to make – it was a little sad that there were a lot of terrific ideas that ended up by the wayside. But that is the gig, I suppose.”
The Legacy:
Despite Harlin, August and Edlund’s repeatedly stating that the third film was going to be the last, Universal would spend the better part of a decade trying to look into a fourth instalment – amongst the treatments considered was one from Richard Stanley, which would have involved human women giving birth to Ghidorah-hybrid babies (derived from a fertility treatment using Ghidorah’s DNA[7], obtained from the head Godzilla ripped off) in a plot from the Golden Demise to both resurrect himself and replace the human race with his offspring.
Described as “a cross between Boys From Brazil, Rosemary’s Baby and The Dunwich Horror”, the idea was understandably vetoed – partly because the premise was hard to make into a T-rated action film and partly because Toho were vehemently opposed to it, with Shogo Tomiyama allegedly describing it as “disgusting”.
This fourth instalment spent the best part of a decade slaloming through Development Hell – especially after The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms[8] underperformed and Tim Burton publicly stated that it was unlikely that a fourth Jurassic Park movie would be happening any time soon. Despite this, Godzilla remained a profitable IP for Universal – with the theme park collaborations, live show and occasional cartoons – and, even as the studio floundered somewhat, the Toho partnership remained an important feather in their cap.
However, in 2012, Universal CCO Majorie Cohn and Toho president Yoshishige Shimatani, in a joint press conference, announced that the franchise would be rebooted with a new introductory film aimed to be released in summer 2015[8], helmed and co-written by up-and-comer Colin Trevorrow, that will “re-introduce the King of Monsters to a whole new audience”.
Not only that, but the reboot film will also be the start of a new Godzilla-Kong shared continuity – with the Kong side started with a new Skull Island film, directed by Spanish horror director JA Bayona, with the ultimate intention that Godzilla and Kong appear in a film together for the first time since the 1960s. Peter Jackson, second unit director and co-writer of Kong: King of Skull Island and director of the 2002 King Kong, will act as executive producer for these new films, with his Wingnut Films production company acting as production partners.
– – – –
[1] – As you might figure, this is what Godzilla vs. Spacegodzilla is called ITTL, at least in English speaking markets, with Toho adopting a common fan nickname for him as his English name.
As to why Toho were so eager to claim Mecha-G…
Big reason Toho restarted the franchise in Japan ITTL was because of the Black Lagoon debacle, which Toho followed closely ITTL. After seeing how Universal (and Katzenberg in particular) screwed it up, Toho start getting suspicious of their American partners and cover their bets, so to speak - reviving the franchise on their own accord as a backup.
So obviously, Toho aren’t going to be too keen on letting Universal hang on to Mechagodzilla (and Cohn is using her semi-mentor’s snap up all the popular monsters) – and Cohn feels that, since they’ve got Mothra and King Ghidorah, they can afford to take a gamble (and perhaps also remembering that Anguirus – who was also comparatively obscure – was G2’s breakout character).
[2] - No, he hasn’t been butterflied (although the circumstances of his origins are far different from OTL)! He becomes an Ensemble Darkhorse pretty much from the start ITTL, for putting up a surprisingly good fight against MOGUERA and being part of a memorable opening sequence…. and the Kaiju who gets wrecked in the Final Wars equivalent is Gabara.
The only other one of the original Kaiju I’ve actually decided on is a chalicothere-type mammalian kaiju (NOT based on OTL!Behemoth, funnily enough – but a Mapinguari-corresponding Kaiju to fit the Kaiju = myth thing… he’s found in Brazil).
[3] - Post on this possibly incoming. And the original plan is for Ghidorah to be frozen in an Arctic iceberg as a climate change metaphor – however, Universal meddling forces Harlin, August and Edlund to move the sequence… which has the side effect of making the prologue (set in Alaska) not really make much sense.
[4] – Right… here's a bit of explanation here on what happened with Mecha-G in G2.
Basically, Wilkins found a frozen Ghidorah head, thawed it out - based on how octopus limbs still live after they've been cut off - vivisected it, removing a chunk of its brain and stimulated its natural healing factor to grow a brain for Mechagodzilla, which he integrated with the AI, with the idea that they both be controlled remotely by a human pilot (not the best term to use, but...)
When Mecha-G's control was severed, the organic brain took control of the AI, programming Mechagodzilla with the basic instincts of a Ghidorah (and that's why it had the strange obsession with killing Godzilla - they were natural enemies).
With this and the Toho Mecha-G duology (which has roughly the Kiryu origin from OTL), it becomes a thing in TTL Godzilla media that Mechagodzilla has some sort of organic component (of various points of origin - usually Godzilla or Ghidorah-derived).
[5] – Basically think Ted Crilly’s freakouts on Father Ted OTL (and ITTL), only much less funny.
[6] – Yeah, the GMK Ghidorah’s been butterflied… but there’s still a Ghidorah in an early-2000’s movie with major changes that are controversial with fans (Mothra also resembles a cross between her GMK/GvTG version and the MonsterVerse versions – the changes with her are less controversial).
[7] - Based on a surprisingly charming MonsterVerse fic called Abraxas, which ended with... exactly that. Unfortunately, I get the vibe Toho would not let this be made in any timeline – and a good thing, too (considering Stanley’s script opens with one of Ghidorah’s unfortunate babymamas dying in childbirth… with A LOT of blood).
[8] – Might have seen this mentioned in the Godzilla 2 post – post on this will ABSOLUTELY be coming soon.
[8] – This is TTL’s equivalent to OTL’s Monsterverse – revived in the 90's nostalgia wave in the 2010s' to duel Disney/MGM’s JP revival (and growing expanded universe). Trevorrow and Bayona were picked for allo-irony - basically, my original plans were to do a complete allo-ironic switch with the Monsterverse and JW directors... however, that has since fallen by the wayside – however, Trevorrow would probably make a really good G-movie.
In Brief: New York Times Movie Reviews Biopic Edition
LBJ: (2018) John Candy is a powerhouse as of one of America’s most divisive presidents;⭐⭐½
In Plain Sight: (2007) An excellent absurdist dramedy based on the shockingly true story of Robert Hanssen (Oliver Platt), an FBI veteran turned longtime Soviet mole, and Debra Evans Smith (Kerry Washington), the rookie agent who exposed him; ⭐⭐⭐
Art of the Steal: (2018) Johnny Depp steps into the bizarre world of controversial businessman, unlikely TV personality, failed presidential candidate, and convicted fraudster Donald Trump;⭐⭐
Voodoo Macbeth: (2009) Cinema legend and diplomat Sidney Poitier briefly emerges from his retirement to direct a sterling ensemble cast in a rousing biographical drama about the groundbreaking 1936 Shakespeare production, which featured an all-black cast directed by a young Orson Welles[1]; ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Robeson: (2002) Dennis Haysbert soars as the legendary singer and activist[2]; ⭐⭐⭐
[1] The main cast includes:
Alfre Woodard as Rose McClendon (producer and original intended actress for Lady Macbeth)
Michael Ealy as Jack Carter (Macbeth)
Taraji P. Henson as Edna Thomas (Lady Macbeth)
David Oyelowo as Canada Lee (Banquo)
Jeffrey Wright as Eric Burroughs (Hectae)
Jesse Plemons as Orson Welles (director)
Bill Camp as John Houseman (company co-director)
Woodard, Oyelowo, and Plemons receive Oscar nominations, with Henson winning Best Actress.
[2] Haysbert wins a Golden Globe and an Oscar for his performance.
Pay it Forward!!: Part Deux
Article by M.N. Emauphorwon[1] from Enlightening Times Magazine, May 2002 Edition
Guest post by @MNM041 with assistance from @Nathanoraptor
Today in this edition of Enlightening Times Magazine, we will be continuing our three-part series on how John Henson's philosophy of Paying It Forward had an impact on the entertainment landscape and was instrumental in giving second chances to people in need. The subjects of the second part of this insightful article are Chris Smith, Phil Hartman, Chris Farley, Layne Staley, Elliot Smith, Big Pun.
When we left off, John helped River Phoenix kick the drugs and convinced him to adopt his hippie vegan lifestyle which in turn led River to meet John Candy for the 1994 comedy Deadheads and Candy, after a near-fatal heart attack, would also adapt John's philosophy on life. Meanwhile, Freddie Mercury met Kurt Cobain on the set of the Brooks/ZAZ comedy Lame Ducks which also led the two to meet Robin Williams who introduced them to Jim Carrey and eventually world-renowned rappers Tupac Shakur and Christopher Wallace, otherwise known as The Notorious BIG or Biggie. But John and Freddie weren't just done yet as they along with Tupac would meet other individuals to offer help in overcoming their troubles.
Choosing to follow the word of the Buddha John and “paying it forward '', Biggie and Tupac would be there for two young artists who needed them. The two would later be cast in Crossed, the Spike Lee hip-hop and R&B musical adaptation of William Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet[2]. Tupac, a fan of the play, would produce the movie, as well as play the part of Mercutio, while Biggie played Tybalt. In the role of Juliet, singer Aaliyah was cast, with Tupac and director Spike Lee agreeing she was perfect for the role. She would later go on to sign with Pac & Biggie’s record label, Coast2Coast, and with the help and support of them and many other artists, spoke out against her ex-husband R-Kelly, leading to his eventual arrest[3]. For the role of Romeo, it came down to both members of Kris Kross. Eventually, Chris Kelly was chosen but it wouldn't be the last time Pac and Biggie crossed paths with Chris Smith either. Both of them could tell he was in a bad place, which would later be confirmed by Chris Kelly during production.
(Credit @Vemix on Instagram)
With the help of his friend Tupac, an intervention would be staged for Smith, helping him get off drugs. "I'm still here today because a lot of people were all there for me. Not everyone has that." Tupac would say during an interview with Conan O'Brien. "Not everyone has that, so I guess I figured I'd be there for Chris to help him get over his demons".
Tupac, alongside Aaliyah, would later pay it forward to help another person in need when the pair appeared on Saturday Night Live to promote Crossed. Here, the two would end up meeting and befriending comedian Phil Hartman. When Hartman's marriage began to go south, Tupac in particular would offer him a place to stay while he filed for separation, as the two happened to have houses in Los Angeles. Hartman's ex-wife Brynn would eventually enter rehab following the finalization of their divorce.
"I'm aware it probably sounds like a sitcom setup, but I spent some time at his guest house, feeling like things would only get worse if Brynn and I stayed living under the same roof,” Hartman recalled in his recently-published memoir, You Might Remember Me[4]…, “During this time, he and my dear friend Jon [Lovitiz] felt the need to stage an intervention for me. After I explained why I stayed despite everything, and Tupac, he just looked me dead in the eyes and said, calmly, but bluntly, “You really shouldn’t feel safer in the house of someone you've known for six months than you do in your own house with your wife.” In 1998, Phil Hartman reconnected with his second wife, Lisa Strain, with the two remarrying in 2000[5].
Phil Hartman and his ex-wife Brynn, circa 1996 (Image source; Getty Images)
Over the years, Phil has continued to appear in more films and television shows over the years alongside collaborations with Tupac and Aaliyah[5].
In 1997, another comedic actor, one whom Hartman remains friends with to this day, would be saved from a deadly incident and changed his ways for the better. John's father Jim Henson had known actor Chris Farley through his manager Bernie Brillstein whose daughter Cheryl worked with Chris. Despite his rising stardom, behind the scenes, he was suffering from a mix of drug abuse, alcoholism, and obesity, though Jim and the general public were unaware of his poor health[6]. In early December, Jim would receive a call from his son John. Chris had been dragged into the nurse’s station at the back of his shop on Sunset Boulevard following a drug overdose with his friend Cobain among those present. The nurse administered some medication in the hospital where his health eventually stabilized. What came next would make headlines including a famous interview with Good Neighbor from Farley where he described his path to becoming a born-again Christian and meeting Padre Jose. Farley, in the 2001 Saturday Night Live documentary Live From New York, said that meeting Cobain and John was “the best thing that ever happened to me” since it allowed him to kick his drug addiction and in Farley's own words, "Saved my soul."
Chris Farley, circa 1997 (Image source; Pinterest)
Indeed, Cobain was among the many who helped Farley get off drugs after a long period of self-destructive behavior. Eventually, the combined efforts of these people, including one of Chris Farley's heroes John Candy, led to him going to rehab where, in his own words, Farley "rediscovered Jesus". Farley’s salvation and sobriety became international news, as did John Henson, whose fluid spirituality had made him the subject of attacks by the Religious Right, being his sponsor at a Catholic recovery center. Farley thanked Kurt Cobain, Maria, and John Henson for saving his life, his longtime friends Adam Sandler, as well as David Spade, and Chris Rock for never giving up on him, and Jesus for saving his soul, the latter of which helped diffuse some of the energy of the ongoing attacks against the Hensons. “I don’t care what Pat [Robertson] says”, he publicly commented, “Jim and John are Godly men.”
“When I met the Buddha John at the recovery center, I could tell he was a devout man and I took his advice by reconnecting with my Catholic roots,” Farley explained to us during the surprisingly candid interview with him. Since his recovery, Farley himself has made appearances in not just comedic works but dramatic ones[7].
On the music and especially rock side of things, Kristen Pfaff, who in the years since leaving Hole had grown into a highly respected artist in her own right, would also end up getting another chance to pay it forward while touring the band Alice in Chains. Layne Staley, the band's iconic frontman, had become close friends with Kurt Cobain and the rest of Nirvana during the early days of both bands, with both of them being big in Seattle’s grunge scene. When Cobain began a relationship with Pfaff, she also began a rapport with Staley. That said, Pfaff, who had been off drugs for a few years, disapproved of the heavy drug usage many of her peers indulged in.
Pfaff getting ready for a live show in 1998, photo taken by Cobain. (Source: Livewire)
"Kristen was able to find her way to sobriety, and she wanted to help show us the rest of the way even if some of us didn't want to listen." Billie Joe Armstrong, the Green Day frontman and longtime friend of Pfaff's, recalled in 1996.
"One day, while we were touring in '97, Kurt ended up coming by with his daughter, Frances, after a show we did in Seattle. I was high as a kite, I'm not proud to admit that but it's the truth." Staley recalled during a candid interview with Howard Stern. "I came on the bus, made an ass of myself and Kristen, she just asked Kurt and Frances to step outside and just sort of ripped into me for being high on drugs around her kid. I'd never really known her as the type to get angry like that, so it was sort of a come to Jesus moment for me."[8]
Layne Staley and Kurt Cobain (Image source: Pinterest)
Staley would enter rehab that year, and Pfaff would act as his sponsor while he worked to kick his demons. Since then, Staley and Pfaff have developed a strong friendship that endures to this very day - with Staley reportedly being the godfather of Cobain and Pfaff's children[8].
But Cobain, Pfaff, and Staley weren’t the only singers who would clean up their acts. Elliott Smith, a noted singer-songwriter whose career was quickly on the rise, was fighting his own battle with depression when his and Cobain's paths crossed, meeting in a restaurant in Elliot's hometown of Omaha, Nebraska while both of them were touring.
"I think when we first met, Kurt and I saw this weird bit of ourselves in each other. Like I had a fair bit of the same issues he did, which is why I think he was willing to lend me a hand I really needed at the time," said Smith[9].
According to Cobain, "I could tell that he was in a rough place. Elliot was hurting in a way that reminded me of how I was when I first met Freddie. I felt like I should have tried to be there for him the same way Freddie was for me." Concerned about Elliott's well-being, Cobain would step in to help him kick his addiction to drugs and alcohol along with guidance on how to overcome depression and the two eventually meeting Mercury. Cobain and Smith would forge a close relationship and collaborated on the 2000 album Figure 9[10]. Smith said that he is “looking forward to more collaborations with Kurt in the near future,” in a 2001 interview with us.
Pac, Biggie, and Pun posing for a picture (Credit @Vemix on Instagram)
Speaking of music, the rapper Big Pun (real name Christopher Lee Rios) gained some recognition as Rolls’ biracial Latino cousin Barker in Crossed but hit the big time with his debut album Capital Punishment in 1997. He emerged from the underground hip-hop scene in the Bronx borough of New York City during the early 1990s and was the protege of Fat Joe but Capital Punishment made him into a big name among Latino rappers. However, this came with costs - suffering from depression due to his turbulent childhood, he coped with it through overeating, remarking “Some people say I was depressed because I struggled with my weight - it was the other way round, actually. My weight struggles came from my depression”. Big Pun wanted to lose weight and he would receive help from his fellow rappers, some of whom he worked on Crossed, as well as a more surprising source, John Candy[11]. Candy, having also struggled with his weight, sympathized with Rios's struggle and reached out to offer support to help him.
“I know better than anyone what that feels like, ya’ know? Not liking what you see when you look in the mirror, but also not feeling like you can talk to anyone about it. So, I figured I’d give the guy a call, tell him that it can get better but you need to be willing to take that leap.” said Candy in an exclusive interview with Variety Magazine in 2000. Candy has also said that it resulted in the two becoming friends, with Rios having a minor role in the John Candy vehicle World's Greatest Dad.
"John Candy being willing to offer support wasn't really as surprising as a lot of people would have thought at first," Pun's wife Liza Rios admitted in an interview in 2000. "I think he saw that Chris needed the same kind of support that he was able to find, and I'll always be grateful he reached out."
With Candy’s support and encouragement, Rios was able to enroll in a weight-loss program at Duke University, eventually losing over 100 pounds (a little over 7 stone). Rios has since credited Candy as “a constant voice of support” throughout his journey, commenting that “He was my guardian angel."
What have we learned from this journey? Be there for your friends when they need it - if you notice something wrong, never think “someone else will handle it”... because there may never be a “someone else”. You just might save someone’s life. But it’s not the end yet as you will see in the third and final article of the trilogy[12].
[1] As you can tell, it is a continuation of the previous Pay it Forward post.
[2] Recall in the Not Exactly Shakespeare…oh, wait post that Tupac Shakur, Aaliyah, and Chris Kelly starred in Crossed. The success of this film means that they will go on to have healthy and stable acting careers which has already been confirmed on the Main Thread.
[3] In OTL and TTL, R. Kelly is alleged to have committed sexual misconduct towards minors including Aaliyah, and racketeering since the 1990s. Because of the stronger post-Hill backlash against sexual misconduct, Kelly is convicted on charges of sex offenses and racketeering much sooner.
[4] This is the name of an actual biography of Phil Hartman in OTL. Given he still voices Troy McClure (on Nuclear Family this time), this doesn’t seem like something that was butterflied.
[5] Hartman was tragically killed by Brynn at their home after going to an Italian restaurant in Encino, California. The intervention of Tupac and Aaliyah prevents Phil’s wife from killing him since she was sent to rehab as mentioned in this very post. Moreover, Phil's "friend" Andy Dick will not worsen her addiction to cocaine since he was away filming Creature from the Black Lagoon in South America at the time, as mentioned in @Nathanoraptor's post on the movie. As for Hartman reconnecting with his second wife, he seemed to have maintained a level of closeness with her that Brynn appeared to have been threatened by.
[6] As noted by @Geekhis Khan in the post “Undank ist der Weltenlohn”, Farley got help from John and embraced the philosophy of Paying It Forward.
[8] We would call this the Tom Hanks Syndrome for actors who went from comedy to drama. Given that Farley survived a near-death experience and lost weight, he's going to revamp his image by taking on more dramatic, serious roles.
[7] Layne Staley tragically died of an overdose in 2002, and his body was only found after he had been missing for several days. Here, thanks to Pfaff and later Cobain’s influence, he’s able to get clean.
[8] As you can expect, they’re original-to-TTL characters. They’re also comprised of two sons and a daughter named Leland (after Kurt’s grandfather), Richard and Pearl respectively. Leland was born first in 1997 followed by Richard in 1999 and Pearl in 2000 respectively.
[9] In OTL, Smith was not only a drug addict but a heavy drinker as well and those habits coupled with his ADHD and depression contributed to his death in 2003. Here, the meeting with Cobain ensures that he’ll drop his drug and alcohol habits entirely.
[10] The album in question is known as Figure 8 in OTL.
[11] Big Pun did try to lose weight by signing up for a weight loss program at Duke University but he quit the program and kept his unhealthy weight until death. Here, the fact that he has connections to the rappers and R&B singers in Crossed thanks to Fat Joe recommending him for a role in that movie through auditions means he will their attention and Candy’s as well.
[12] Stay tuned for which celebrities get the “Pay it Forward” treatment.
Oscar Statistics:
- Disney has won Best Animated Feature 11 out of 17 times
- At least 1 Disney animated film has been nominated every year
- 11 Best Animated Feature winners are traditional or hybrid 2D animated films
- 4 Best Animated Feature winners are 3D animated films
- 1 Best Animated Feature winner is a stop-motion animated film
- 2 Best Animated Feature winners are from a foreign film studio
As you can see, the only year I don't have a winner for is 2003. I'm not entirely sure what the status of Studio Ghibli is, but I would recommend that the winner for that year be the version of Spirited Away suggested by Cataquack Warrior way back in the first thread.
All Heather O'Rourke Projects Explained and Ranked (By Herself)
From Swords and Spaceships Magazine, Digital Edition, September 22nd, 2014
Guest post by @MNM041 with assistance from @Plateosaurus and @Nathanoraptor
Heather O’Rourke is an underrated director. Breaking out in the new millennium and creating an instant classic with her debut Meet the Joneses, the former child star has gone on to cement herself as a giant in the genres of Horror and Suburban Gothic with her provocative look at the darker sides of nostalgia, oft-borrowing elements from her childhood. Since then, Heather has found success both behind and in front of the camera with memorable beloved gems to her name, no small feat when you consider she had to direct between various acting gigs.
Film producer Christopher Figg, who's worked on several of O'Rourke's movies, has described her as "Having a creative drive I haven't seen since Clive Barker. The woman barely took a breather in between projects until she became a mum."
We sat down with O’Rourke herself to learn which projects she loves best and which she feels aren’t up to her par - that aren't related to a certain family of Slashers since according to her “The Joneses are evidently a shoo-in for the top and the bottom at a lot of people's lists, and since I’m not interested in your readers being subjected to redundancy or beating a dead horse, I’ll just go with that.” Heather also said that she feels the best way to discuss these films is to go in depth, so in her words "beware of spoilers."
#10 - Imposter (2009)
Oh yes, this, but as a movie
There’s a good reason the film is at the bottom and it's the reason that most have said this movie doesn't feel like something I made: the film was handed to me rather than my creation. Originally the film was directed by former special FX artist Steve Wang and of course, focused on a crew of astronauts living on a spaceship in the far-off future, tensions bloom as they discover a mysterious alien parasite has infected and taken over one of them, while at the same time, a corporate spy is attempting to steal important information.
Unfortunately, production was quite fraught with issues that led to Steve leaving, and I ended up replacing him on incredibly short notice for the reshoots to turn it into more of a horror comedy because that was “more accessible” for audiences. Of course, if that was the case, one does have to wonder why they had me take over. A part of me thinks that I was mostly asked to direct because I was in the movie and I’m honestly not sure how familiar Steve was with my style when he asked me. I honestly felt a little weird having to bring my sensibilities to a film that someone else never thought I would be involved in and I really can't say that I think the results were worth it.
Needless to say, I just think the resulting film was a complete tonal mishmash. Steven was trying to make a much more straightforward sci-fi horror movie than what I ended up making, mostly because my style aims to be more subversive than what I could do here.
My scenes that were left in just had too much in common with films that had already been made like Alien, Isobar, and The Thing (particularly John Carpenter's version) and I think it came off as a tad repetitive and melodramatic, with multiple scenes of characters accusing each other of being the one infected and or being the spy.
My castmates-turned-cast were people like Ryan Reynolds, Andrew Lincoln, Erica Leerhsen, Odette Annable, Michael Eklund, Idris Elba, Rachel Weisz, Jonathan Brandis, and Sam Neill; all of them did amazing, and were very understanding with the changes that came and I love what the special effects team made for the infected crew members, especially the idea of the creatures having these tendrils coming out of various orifices of the body. But at the end of the day, this movie just wasn't me, you know?
Don’t feel too bad for Steven, by the way, he thankfully was able to have a much better debut that wasn’t hampered by interference and his cut of the movie was released in 2012.
#9 - The Wendigo (2005)
The Wendigo focuses on the Mohawk scouts and the Sunshine scouts, two scout troops with a huge rivalry between one another, who end up lost in the woods after a conference. Once night falls, they realize something is stalking them, and it's not a bear, cougar, or even human, but the titular cannibalistic creature. The film becomes a battle for survival against the titular cannibalistic creature, and as food and supplies run low, they must also battle the fear that one of them may end up joining it in its hunger for human flesh.
The cast consists of Nathan Basil and Eliza Dushku as Scoutmasters Dan Burrows and Kelsey Woods, with a bunch of child actors who would go on to do some impressive things serving as the kids they had to look after, while guys like Texas Battle and Leelee Sobieski serving as other people unfortunate enough to get lost in the woods.
I first conceived The Wendigo when I was younger on a camping trip (probably around 15 to 17 so a little after my treatment) around my home in Big Bear Lake, where naturally, ghost stories were told around the campfire. They provided my main inspiration for the film, along with a lot of '70s backwoods horror films like Deliverance and The Hills Have Eyes, as well as the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark book series and Stephen Gammell’s art for it, which I actually own some of the originals of. Meanwhile, I created the basic plot while brainstorming what my first project would be after I was done with the Joneses and acting in other films, ultimately I came up with this horror (as opposed to the more darkly satirical Meet the Joneses movies) that drew inspiration from Native American folklore which, looking back I don't know if I handled that with the most grace.
It was the first project I had done with Skeleton Crew; they’re not just goth stuff, but all kinds of offbeat genre work. I honestly don’t remember the finer details of the production, filming in northern California, but what I do remember is that I just let the effects team go all out on that one. I was always in love with the results, the way they handled the characters transforming was just so awesome to see on film. It was also here I started incorporating my history with Crohn’s disease into my works and how I felt about it: the feeling like your life has barely started and it might already be over, pain lasting for a long time, and being willing to do just about anything that you think will make it stop.
However, rewatching it after all these years, I feel like The Wendigo isn’t my best - my directing on it at worst seems rather messy and really barebones and at best as nothing special, and for all its 70’s inspiration, I think it still looks and feels more like a generic horror film. Coming off the success of the Joneses meant I couldn't keep up for a bit, and you’d think from the way I did it this was my debut and not the other way around.
The reality is that after the pain in my ass that was the shoot for The Guest, I was eager to direct anything that wasn't another pointless attempt at cashing in on Meet The Joneses so I just rushed into this so that I had a chance to show I wasn't a one trick pony. That said, I know a lot of people liked this one when it came out, and I think Nathan Baesel and Eliza Dushku did a great job with what I had to give them, playing the two main adults trying to keep things under control and keep everyone else safe and of course, the kids playing the scouts were all great too.
I'll also say that Eliza and Nathan ended up being great with the younger actors playing the campers. Eliza in particular ended up being very protective of them, and we all made sure that the safety of the kids was our number one priority.
Finally, I'll say this film is a little bittersweet for me because I ended up getting Zelda Rubinstein, who I, of course, worked with in Poltergeist to make a cameo, if you don't recall she's the lady who picks up the main characters saying that those who were left behind "Belong to the Wendigo now." That ended up being the last film she ever did. She was an absolute treat to be around on set and I'm glad I got to work with her one last time. Still, I am overall quite proud of it and it's certainly something I've been interested in exploring again, but it’s not a must-see for me, and I think some of the other "creature features" that came out around the same time were better.
#8 - Homicide For The Holidays (2010)
So, one thing that always shocks people about me is when I tell them that I HATE Christmas movies. Not the good kinds, like It's a Wonderful Life or Miracle On 34th Street, I mean stuff like the bad, cheap romance movies made by cable channels and direct viewing services. The kind of stuff that is just cheesier than the entire state of Wisconsin, whiter than a Klan rally, and feels designed to cater to middle aged women in sad marriages. Jude hates them too but it always surprises people when I mention I hate them. I think I may hate them more because I have the unique distinction of having done one, mostly so I could pay for a new car, which is why there's some schmaltzy movie out there where I played the main character. I hated every minute of doing it, especially with the atmosphere making me feel as though I was being judged for existing (Fun fact: right wing Christians make a lot of those movies, so I wasn't feeling welcome).
Some have compared it to the similarly-deconstructive spoof A Perfect Christmas by Phil Lord and Chris Miller, but I admit I don’t see the comparison beyond “Horror Comedies ripping apart Lifetime Romances”. Full disclosure, neither of us knew about each other's projects until after production had started, Phil and Chris weren't ripping me off and I wasn't ripping them off, it's just that both of us decided to make money off our dislike of Hallmark Christmas movies. Homicide For The Holidays focused on a man who suddenly realized he had eight girlfriends all stolen by the same lumberjack (who is also a serial killer) and now has to try and keep his current girlfriend from suffering the same fate.
I remember during casting I wanted people who had kind experience with these kinds of schmaltzy movies, which was how I ended up casting Sean Faris, Robert Buckley, and Katie McGrath ended up being the leads there as each of them had done one of those types of movies to pay the bills. Watching this movie, I can't help but think about how I have a reputation for putting my main characters through the wringer because Sean had to act like he was on the verge of a mental breakdown for half the movie.
I liked getting a chance to play around with the setting in this. Hallmark movies have this tendency to Give the small town settings this quaint little snowy charm, but here the cold is meant to be almost oppressive like in The Thing and the setting itself, especially once the horror aspects start to show up more, invokes more a feeling of isolation. Sean’s character, Jack, is stuck in this town with murder and no one seems to take him and his warnings seriously because they just think he’s “being a Scrooge”.
It was essentially my middle finger to everything I hate about Christmas: the commercialization of the holiday, the politicization of it by right wing dickheads, the rampant consumerism and the incessant need some people feel to criticize those that don't get into the holiday spirit. I'll also admit that I made some weird choices for this movie's soundtrack. I sometimes wonder if Jude's musical taste rubbed off on me too much, because I ended up making a Christmas movie that had very little Christmas music and a lot of punk and goth music, including a scene where a character sings a song by the Misfits.
I will admit it's somewhat predictable, which I think is the main issue I have with it looking back, not to mention there's the fact that while I made the cinematography in a few scenes feel bland to mimic the uninspired look of many Hallmark movies, I do worry I may have made the film to uninteresting to look at, but I think I think it has an excellent charm to it, and at the very least, I feel confident in saying that the romance elements were better handled than in actual Hallmark movies, mostly thanks to Sean and Katie's impeccable chemistry, so that’s a plus.
#7 - Running Scared (1997)
Most of you probably didn’t even know this was a thing, and I don’t fault you for that. This was the follow-up short I made after finishing film school, and if you’ve seen it, I’m guessing that you saw it on the VCD release for Meet the Joneses. It’s the last thing I ever did before my big break with Meet the Joneses. The story was about an envious but lazy boy being attacked by the decapitated but now animated legs of his more successful brother after a car accident. I don’t know where I got the idea for this from, but I think some kind of substance was involved, and maybe a few incidents as a kid.
By all rates, it was the one that got me noticed by Universal in the directing department even if my student film was the one that got some headlines. I’m willing to bet that a few people reading this know I directed a few of the last episodes of Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids and I'm pretty sure this short was what got me that gig, mostly because that was very much the tone I was going for. I'm certainly very proud of it, though if I had to guess, the thing most people think of when it comes to this short is that it was made just before I showed up in Who Is Alan Smithee? and also features my buddy Jason Narvey, who also played a character in that film.
#6 - Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids
And speaking of Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids, I suppose I should probably spend a bit of time talking about the time I spent working on that show, shouldn't I? I was a recurring actor on the show for a while and eventually they decided to let me direct a pair in the last season, where they exhausted Jamie Rix’s stories and began making original stories.
Mommy’s Little Monster - A story about a bratty little girl who’s imagination spawns a strange creature who she comes to care for like a son, but when she starts mistreating it, it turns against her. All the while, the girl remains oblivious of her own horribleness to her parents.
Brother-Begone - Kevin, a 13-year old eternally feuding with his horrid younger brother Abe and his parent’s refusal to do anything about it finds a toll number that specializes in taking away naughty siblings, run by the seemingly-affable (for a child-kidnapping boogeyman) Mr. Boogs, played by Eddie Murphy… except Boogs decides Kervion is the naughtier one. The ending where Abe and the parents can only look on in horror as Kevin is taken away by Mr. Boogs is definitely where I started my own sense of style. I actually intentionally shot the scene to look like Abe has gotten his comeuppance for mistreating his brother in perhaps the worst possible way, and his parents are gone to give him a severe reality check. The ending where Abe and the parents can only look on in horror as Kevin is taken away by Mr. Boogs is definitely where I started my own sense of style. I actually intentionally shot the scene to look like Abe has gotten his comeuppance for mistreating his brother in perhaps the worst possible way.
Side note: You might have noticed both episodes and Running Scared are about twisted family relations and bad younger siblings, which have prompted some to wonder if it reflected my life story. Up front, that's not really the case. I was an only child, remember? What I will say is that these kinds of stories fascinated me at the time. I think it came from the fact that, when I was growing up, you and even while I was in film school, you had examples of stuff like this, both in fiction and on the news, and that kind of led to a morbid curiosity, and in turn, that was what turned me into this show. It helps that I had picked up a favorite book at the time, a thriller from 1989 called Neibolt Street (no relation to King), which was all about twisted sibling relations, but with plenty of nuance for both sides. Nothing from my life or the life of anyone I know was part of my inspiration for this.
I like what I did for this show, but I'm mature enough to admit it's very novice. I don't think anyone would be surprised to know that it was one of the first gigs my agent helped procure for me. Not terrible, but also far from the best thing I've ever made.
#5 - Primeval - “Can I Keep It?” (2009)
The call for my television debut courtesy came from across the pond, when Tim Haines, the man behind the documentary Where Dinosaurs Roam, had started a new project: Primeval - a horror series involving all kinds of prehistoric life wreaking havoc in our world… and the people whose duty it is to keep them in line.
A little backstory here - this was roughly around Season Two, where the Skeleton Crew had negotiated a co-production deal (because Tim Burton had watched it and liked it), with both Primeval and Tales of the Cryptids to air on NBC - so Tim and Adrian were able to increase their operation enormously - they could film overseas and they could hire bigger stars and bigger directors. They had seen my films, loved Meet the Joneses, and tapped me for one (even if British suburbia aren’t exactly like the North American kind). I wasn’t exactly a dinosaur girl, but the offer sounded pretty interesting.
So I’m talking on the phone with Jude and I commented to her that some British guy named Tim Haines had sent me an email about a story outline for a show called Primeval. Jude’s response? “Heather, I love that show! I have the whole first season on VCD!” So… yeah, that gave me another reason to say yes… brownie points with my girlfriend.
So, in my first meeting with them, Tim and Adrian offhandedly mentioned that they had an idea for a story that darkly - and tragically - deconstructed the classic child’s dream of keeping a pet dinosaur by simply asking the question… What happens when it grows up? In addition, they were looking for something like the first season to basically remind long-time viewers, after episodes like Tides of War, that they were still this British horror series - they hadn’t taken a bunch of Disney/NBC money and gone all Hollywood.
So I wrote a story around that premise - set in the village of Drake’s Hill (a suggestion from Tim Haines, because drake is an old name for dragon) in which this little girl named Emily (the acting debut of Florence Pugh) found a dinosaur egg (a Utahraptor to be precise) in the backyard that, of course, ends up hatching. Naming it Griff, she asks her parents (Martin Freeman and Jessica Hynes) if she can keep it (as you do).
As Griff comes to grow in size and appetite, he becomes sort of a secret in the town - and Merrick becomes kind of nervous about him, for obvious reasons. Of course, when livestock killings and unusual animal attacks begin to occur, it seems his fears are warranted, contrary to the assertions of both Emily and her older sister Lucy (Lily James). And that’s when our heroes come in.
It was basically a farmer and the viper-style story (and that’s why we have Jenny and Nick discussing that tale in the car)... no matter how much you may love it - and no matter how much it loves you back - some creatures simply cannot belong in our world. The scene between Jenny and Emily, after they find out about Griff, was invaluable in this regard - it’s some of Lucy Brown’s finest acting.
Unfortunately, Griff later attacks Joe, Lucy’s abusive boyfriend (a delightfully smarmy - as if there’s any other kind - Tom Felton), in her defense, biting off one of his fingers… and giving him a bit of a vendetta about the Utahraptor - which creates a sense of urgency to get Griff out of town before Joe hunts him down. At this point, we find out that there’s another predator on the loose - this Allosaurus-type thing that’s actually responsible for the killings.
After a scuffle between the two predators, the episode ends on a somber note, with Griff escaping into the forests after driving the allosaur back through the closing anomaly (and the allosaur eating Joe) - and he and Emily sharing a sad goodbye. The final scene is Griff, scarred from the battle, hunting and killing a deer, scanning the woods with a strangely serene expression on his face. He’s back in a wild context for the first time in his life, in the woods which are now his lonely kingdom.
Filming in England was pretty fun, especially since most of my travel expenses were pretty much covered for me. The actors were all a blast to work with - Douglas Henshall and Lucy Brown were tremendous fun, as were Martin Freeman, Jessica Hynes and David Bradley (who played the curmudgeon-with-a-heart-of-gold Mr. Bentley), whilst Tom, Lily and Florence did a fantastic job and really held their own.
However, TV budgets constrained most of what I had in mind - a lot of the rewrites concerned had to be left out mostly because of time constraints. In particular, we had an ending in mind where we did a time skip and we revealed that Griff had found a mate and had offspring… and revealed that he had also found his way to his old home, and regularly visits the Mitchells’ neighbourhood with his family. We all loved the scene - and it was even filmed - but it got cut for time constraints. We managed to get the scene back in on the VCD release - so it’s canon, don’t worry!
On an aside, the ending monologue - a trademark for the show - is probably some of the best writing I’ve ever done (and with Douglas Henshall’s acting… chef’s kiss!). Now, you’ve probably seen it on the VCD, but if you have Marla’s attention span, here it is in full:
“Whilst the events in Drake’s Hill strongly support the theory of anomaly cyclicality, as does the seeming historical evidence of such activity in the area, further observation is needed. With the retreat of the allosaurid, the attacks all but ceased - Joe Broughton’s remains were never found and he is considered missing, presumed dead. It has been recommended that Drakes’ Hill be monitored… just in case.
“As for the Utahraptor… Griff, his whereabouts remain a mystery. The possibility of searching for him has been raised - however, considering we are dealing with a large, intelligent predator, the notion is a fool’s errand. However, fleeting sightings and occasional rabbit and deer kills, almost come off as him reminding us he’s still here, still hiding and still hungry.
The Mitchell family have been consistently evasive when enquiries have been made, as have others. All we know is that Griff is almost certainly alive - and, possibly, somehow has a family of his own - and that he’s keeping a low profile… and he’s wise to do so.
Perhaps Griff remembers that humans were once kind to him, just as much as those who were cruel - and on some level, he understands that we contain the capacity for both… and often display this on a whim. Better to keep a distance.
Did Griff simply drive off a rival predator that had trespassed on what he had come to view as his territory or did he face a far more powerful opponent for the safety of the people who loved him - and who he loved in return? Perhaps we’re wrong to think it one or the other - perhaps nature and nurture don’t exist in opposition, but in harmony. Perhaps the viper, contrary to Aesop, can be tamed after all.
Brilliant.
Anyway…
#4 - A Dinosaur in Central Park (2010)
As previously stated, I’d enjoyed my episode of Primeval immensely, but I wasn’t quite satisfied with it because like I said earlier, it felt a lot more limited in what I could do than I was used to. At the same time, I wanted to write a story inspired by the adventure films of the 1980s I grew up with. After all, this was the era when 80’s nostalgia was at its zenith and everyone wanted to make their love letter to the films of Steven Spielberg and Robert Zemeckis, and since I both grew up on those films and grew up with a significant number of people who were in those films.
In the wake of my Primeval episode, I remained pretty close with Tim Haines and Adrian Hodges (much to Jude’s excitement), and they revealed to me, shortly after we were done on that, that they were looking to make a film set in the same universe as the series… and they wanted me to direct it.
This was about the time where Tim was letting the “new meat” guys make their big debuts - people like Michael Dougherty (who’d done Trick or Treat), Joe Lynch (who was doing Dead End), Adam Wingard (who was doing Eaters of the Dead) and Gareth Edwards (who was doing South of the Border).
So Shawn Levy and I transplanted the story to New York, borrowing elements from my episode of Primeval liberally, mixing in the DNA of stuff like ET, Goonies, and a fair few other 80s movies, which is a big part of the reason my buddies, Ke Huy Quan and Henry Thomas, both made appearances and of course it’s also the reason my better half made an appearance.
The story we created was of Todd Barrett (Zachary Gordon), a science-loving boy whose family moves to NYC so his father (Steve Zahn) can oversee the construction of a bunch of new skyscrapers, but gets a frosty reception from the locals, who see him as an extension of gentrifying efforts by wealthy elitists. Lo and behold, what should appear when Todd’s mom (my better half Jude) goes for a walk in Central Park that night but a baby dinosaur. Naturally, Todd wants to keep essentially hiding it away like E.T. while it keeps going out at night and causing mayhem. PG rated mayhem, but mayhem nonetheless.
Whilst A Dinosaur In Central Park was not as dependent on horror elements as my previous works (or, indeed, its parent series), the work was in no way tame - the main dinosaurs in the film (the comparatively obscure tyrannosaur relative Dryptosaurus - thanks, Cap Hook[1]…) are portrayed as both caring parents and vicious predators. Nevertheless, it still bore many of the same hallmarks of my films. The theme of underlying darkness beneath bright exteriors is seen in the gentrifying project Todd’s parents are working on, which was not only threatening the homes of the poorer neighborhoods by raising the property rates but would also be shitty for the environment.
This movie was a great chance for me to get out of my comfort zone and make a movie that I would be comfortable letting my son watch (and we do - it’s become a little tradition in the run-up to Christmas) - and it served as a bit of antidote to the darkness of Sweetie, which I was working on I had just started production on (Shawn was very helpful in shouldering the burden - he oversaw most of the post-production… we were getting a Christmas release anyway, so there wasn’t a rush). Will it result in me making more movies like it? Who can really say?
#3 - Doctor Satan (2007)
Not quite this but has shades of it
DOCTOR SATAN! I'm sorry I had to.
In Doctor Satan, the Kentucky town of Halestown may seem like a picturesque place, but it’s anything but, and it's about to be revealed when the titular town doctor (played by the awesome Sid Haig) returns from his service in the military with an army of mutants, literally loaded with guns. Now, the town must band together to put a stop to this, or risk becoming the next person on his operating table.
When Robert [Rodriguez] told me about the Grindhouse project[2], I knew I wanted in, because I loved those kinds of ridiculously over-the-top, violent flicks. I essentially pitched him an idea I had been toying with for a while since the first time I had worked with Rob Zombie.
Rob had come up with this idea for a character named Doctor Satan, which came from an old pulp magazine I think. After some back and forth between us, we had something pretty close to what we see in the film[3]. Since he and Sheri were already doing another Grindhouse movie, Werewolf Women Of The SS, Rob let me take the reins, though I did give him a writing credit and a producer credit.
I've always loved the visual of an entire town coming together to take down some nigh-unstoppable force of nature, so that was a lot of fun to shoot. I remember the effects took a lot of cues from the films of Frank Henenlotter for the mutants Dr. Satan created, we just had a lot of these really weird designs that almost don't even look like humans because I didn't want to make those people feel like freaks. It helped desensitize the audience to the carnage and kinda clued them into the fact that this a more heightened world than some of my other works. It also makes Dr. Satan himself feel more fun. More Doctor Claw than Doctor Mengele, ya know.
Overall, Doctor Satan was one of the most fun experiences I ever had as a director topped only by some films that are far more personal to me.
Honorable Mentions
I’ve also written for other films and directed a handful of TV episodes and since I don’t think of those as my projects, I think I’ll go over them real quickly here.
TV episodes - I’ll be honest and say I don’t even remember directing some episodes for certain shows if only because they were passable but rather average. For instance, I directed a 2003 episode of the HBO football drama The Commissioner[3] where the titular character (played by Dennis Quaid) had to deal with one owner’s issue about a player’s contract. The show itself is overall great in its examination of the sport but this episode too many, including myself, was “meh” in contrast to the later episodes of the series. Another was the sequel series of the ABC sports sitcom Coach titled Coach: Game Day where Craig T. Nelson’s Hayden Fox was the head coach of the fictional NFL team the Orlando Breakers and I directed an episode in the second season in 2008 where Hayden is trying to help a player for charity which is not exactly great but not terrible either. Overall, the TV episodes I directed were fine but weren’t that memorable.
The Safe House (2004) - Ah, Robert De Niro. He’s one of the greatest actors of all time to ever grace the silver screen with classics that I don’t need to go into because there’s a decent chance that you’ve seen more of them than I have. I had the distinct honor of writing this thriller after its director, De Niro himself saw and liked to Meet the Joneses, about two New York sisters and their adoptive mom protecting themselves from said sisters’ abusive father and his partner in crime with the help of his former partner (played by De Niro himself). I distinctly remember that after I got the offer to help with rewrites, I ended up repeatedly pinching myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.
Poltergeist: Resurrection (2004): I, of course, co-wrote this movie with my on-screen brother, Oliver Robbins, who sat in the director's chair for this movie. It focused on our characters from the original once again being haunted by the Beast. I'm proud of what we did with this movie but it's just something I contributed to, with Oliver being the real driving force. By the way, if you're one of those people that think I was "the real director" fuck off, it's just as stupid as when we had those debates with the original[5]. That said, I am really glad I was able to help finish Carol's story, just because of how close to my heart she's always been.
Haunted Mansion (2006): I loved writing for this movie, but I was by no means the most important person in that writer's room. I'm willing to admit that most of my contributions to this film were lines for the characters that Jude voiced, and while writing material for my better half is certainly a nice gig, it's far from the most meaningful work I've ever done.
Small Dark Room (2006) - I was hired by David Cronenberg to do rewrites on this movie around the same time I was hired for Haunted Mansion, which made for a weird time because I was juggling time between a family comedy and a gritty crime drama. I know that I said my hiatus from filmmaking was down to a desire to spend more time with my family after a surgery but in truth, it was also because I was really in need of a break. Needless to say though, it was still an awesome experience.
Sweetly Twisted[6] (2008) - John Waters, as I'm sure many people know, is one of my biggest mentors so I naturally jumped at a chance to work with him when he offered me a chance to help write the script for this raunchy college comedy. I'd give you a summary, but I can now hear my kid in the next room so you’ll have to search it up yourself. Another great experience, though it is quite possibly the filthiest material I've ever written. I once joked with Jude "Obviously, this is one that we don't let Jonah see." Jude just looked at me and said, "I don't think this would be appropriate for me to see." Which was the point I wondered if I had gone overboard. I had. I had. I almost got us an NC rating. So anyway, I feel like I should get to number one before this just turns into me humble bragging. There's a struggling screenwriter out there that probably wants to ring my neck.
#2 - Sweetie (2011)
People are probably going to be really shocked to see this at this spot. Sweetie, a movie about a popular child star played by Mackenzie Foy who is mistreated by the ones close to her. This film was a more dramatic affair that spotlighted the entertainment industry's disturbing treatment of child stars by predatory executives and how the parents of the parents of these children would enable this. Sweetie is to Hollywood child stars what Penny Marshall’s Kandi was to the American porn industry - I admit I found out about the script through my better half, Jude and after reading it I just knew I wanted to help bring it to life.
As dark and morbid a film as it is, I admit Sweetie is one of my favorite projects. Maybe it's the catharsis that comes along with helping show people just how fucked up it was back then. Between my experience in the industry and the horror stories I heard from many of my friends, I think Sweetie could qualify as my most personal film.
I knew I wanted to handle that as respectfully as possible, so before shooting began, I showed the script to a lot of my fellow former child actors. I constantly was worried I might end up making something too f****** up to put in theaters, and thankfully they were all on board with it.
I think part of what drew me to it, as most people probably remember about me, was that I can remember that point that the script was calling back to and how horrible things could be. I remembered going to the funerals of Corey Feldman and Corey Haim, and I remembered studio executives trying to get me to do stuff like losing weight even when I started to hit puberty. This made me extremely uncomfortable as I didn’t want to ruin my body and suffer even further than I did the last time. This coupled with the advice of my parents led me to take a break from acting until I was an adult. It was only after the Anita Hill scandal, which was when those sick pervos finally started to get their comeuppance did much of the world see the dark side of Hollywood and the entertainment industry. That and my burgeoning directing career resulted in this film being made.
If you were a kid in Hollywood, you remembered it. While things have gotten better, don't think for a second that those kinds of pervs have gone away entirely after Anita Hill. Some of these people are still around. It's just that they hide their predatory behavior much better than Weinstein or Spacey or still have prominent connections which is why I'm glad that Sweetie shined a spotlight on those kinds of people.
This movie ended up being big for me in a way that I never expected. It's probably the most mainstream thing from my filmography outside of the obvious and I'm honestly glad of that. I knew that after this film, I was going to go on hiatus, and nabbing an Oscar nomination isn't the worst note to go on. However, like I said back then, it was far from the last thing I'll ever make.
#1 - Dear Old Dad (2008)
If anyone here remembers Nostalgia Critic's review of this film, it's essentially the fake horror movie trailer that was done there.
Didn’t expect this to be my favorite, did you? The basic elevator pitch for this film was putting a horror movie spin on the tired family movie premise of the workaholic parent finally being able to spend time with their family after some fantastical shenanigans. The plot was basically that an overworked realtor, played by Dave Coulier, suddenly dies in a freak car wreck, and returns as a ghost. After that, he decides to make up for the fact that he wasn't able to be there for his family in life by being there for them in his afterlife.
We wanted the film to be almost a bait and switch, where it seems to just be a goofy comedy with supernatural hijinx, but as it progresses Dave's character starts to lash out in increasingly violent ways all while you can tell his sanity is slipping until eventually, you realize we're watching the bad guy. I think that was kind of what made some of the executives tug their shirt collars, and they kept trying to make my course correct, which resulted in an entire subplot being added in during production solely so Dave's character seems better. So, if you saw the movie and wondered why it was suddenly revealed that another ghost was in the house, that was why.
I wanted this movie to be a reflection of the bad behaviors we saw in a lot of family movies, how they seemed to excuse bad fathers, absent fathers, fathers who always seemed to let down their families and how that kind of neglect often comes with worse tendencies. It was actually why I cast Dave Coulier to play the dad, but while Dave himself was game for everything I gave him, the studio seemingly wanted us to change because they didn't want men's rights activists jumping down their throats, which I thought was bullshit.
Dave Coulier was great to work with, down for anything I gave him, as were the rest of the cast playing his family. This film admittedly also holds a special place in my heart because it was the first film where Jude and I co-wrote the script together. No matter what anyone else thinks of this movie, I'm always going to love that I was able to create something like this with the woman I love. Which is why I'm glad that after my cut of the movie was released, it found new life through word of mouth. [7]
[1] Cap Hook is a relatively complete specimen of Dryptosaurus found in New Egypt, NJ in 2001 and described in 2005, which not only gave scientists a better understanding of it but also (re-)elevates it to prominence in palaeo-media due to media hyping it up as the “Tyrant in your backyard”.
[2] Grindhouse already exists ITTL but the films listed are very different. For one thing, there's more than two of them,
[3] Rob Zombie has admitted that he came up with the plot for House of 1000 Corpses as he was pitching it for the first time, meaning that the Firefly Family movies are essentially butterflied, but that doesn't mean he couldn't still come up with some similar ideas.
[4] More on that HBO series in a future post, especially its relation to a certain football movie.
[5] How will this flick play out for O’Rourke and Robbins? Let’s wait and see.
[6] The title of this movie came from a review for the OTL John Waters movie A Dirty Shame although everything about it including the plot and characters is original.
[7] Details about the plots of these are mostly left sparse in case anyone wants to expand on them.
The Muppet Show Guest Stars (Season 6)
6x01) Michael Caine. October 4th 1981
6x02) Tom Baker. October 11th 1981
6x03) Olivia Newton John. October 18th 1981
6x04) Matthew Corbett with Sooty and Sweep, Gerry Anderson, Basil Brush and Rod Hull with Emu[1]. October 25th 1981
6x05) KISS. November 1st 1981
6x06) Larry Hagman. November 8th 1981
6x07) Cher. November 15th 1981
6x08) Dan Ackroyd and John Belushi. November 22nd 1981
6x09) Salvador Dalí. November 29th 1981
6x10) Mel Blanc. December 6th 1981
6x11) Andy Kaufman. December 13th 1981
6x12) Miles Davis. December 20th 1981
6x13) Bill Crosby. December 27th 1981[2]
6x14) Fred Rogers. January 3rd 1982
6x15) John Ritter. January 10th 1982
6x16) Queen. January 17th 1982
6x17) Tony Bennett. January 24th 1982
6x18) David Bowie. January 31st 1982
6x19) Stan Freiberg. February 7th 1982
6x20) Harrison Ford. February 14th 1982
6x21) Lucille Ball and Jerry Lewis. February 21st 1982
6x22) Betty White. February 28th 1982
6x23) Robin Williams. March 7th 1982
6x24) William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy and DeForest Kelley[3]. March 14th 1982
The Muppet Show Guest Stars (Season 7)
7x01) Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. October 3rd 1982
7x02) The B-52's. October 10th 1982
7x03) Mr. T. October 17th 1982
7x04) Arnold Schwarzenegger. October 24th 1982
7x05) Kim Cattrall. October 31st 1982
7x06) Bette Midler[4]. November 7th 1982
7x07) Carrie Fisher. November 14th 1982
7x08) Electric Light Orchestra. November 21st 1982
7x09) Dolly Parton. November 28th 1982
7x10) Oingo Boingo. December 5th 1982
7x11) Frankie Laine. December 12th 1982
7x12) Ray Charles. December 19th 1982
7x13) Don Rickles. December 26th 1982
7x14) Herbie Hancock. January 2nd 1983
7x15) Sterling Holloway. January 9th 1983
7x16) Aerosmith. January 16th 1983
7x17) Eric Idle and Graham Chapman[4]. January 23rd 1983
7x18) Bruce Springsteen. January 30th 1983
7x19) Lionel Richie. February 6th 1983
7x20) Larry Bird. February 13th 1983
7x21) Michael Jackson. February 20th 1983
7x22) Hulk Hogan. February 27th 1983
7x23) John Candy. March 6th 1983
7x24) Jim Henson. April 3rd 1983 -------------------
[1] Gerry Anderson appears with marionettes from Thunderbirds and Captain Scarlet, two completely different styles of supermarionation (with the Thunderbirds marionette having oversized heads and a caricatured appearance, while the Captain Scarlet style marionette has smaller heads and natural body propositions). Basil Brush, is being performed by Ivan Owen (who won't be appearing in person on the Muppet Show as he famously ensured he was never seen throughout his time performing him).
[2] Like the episode featuring Chris Langham in OTL, and most certainly in TTL, this episode will not be included on Disney Direct's list of Muppet Show episodes to view.
[3] This episode is almost like Episode 417, with Mark Hamill, R2-D2, C-3PO and Chewbacca, for as they appeared four months before Empire Strikes Back, Shatner, Nimoy and Kelley's appearance on the Muppet Show is before Star Trek II: Wrath of Khan (which released on June 4th, 1982).
[4] Bette Midler, Eric Idle and Graham Chapman were among the "dream line-up" for The Muppet Show by the Muppet performers.
Special thanks to @Servo1991, @OldNavy1988, @Plateosaurus, @Ogrebear and @Brainbin for their suggestions in AHITHOM, namely Don Rickles, Herbie Hancock, Sterling Holloway, ELO, Frankie Laine, Aerosmith, Leonard Nimoy and the other Star Trek cast. They certainly inspired me to help fill out the gaps!
Now, the finalized version of my Muppet Quiz post.
From: Looking Back on Muppet Quiz (2015-2021)
Article by Tommy Maguire [1] for Maguire's Two Cents, March 30, 2022.
Guest post by @Trevor807; idea by @Shockeye7665
The Muppets have delighted audiences for more than 65 years. They have starred in many television series over the years, most famously Sesame Street (which has run since 1969) and The Muppet Show. In 2015, Walt Disney Television, Muppet Studios [2] and NBC brought us Muppet Quiz, bringing the Muppets to primetime for the first time since Too Late with Miss Piggy, and in time for their 60th anniversary. The Muppeteer lineup of Steve Whitmire, Eric Jacobson, Dave Goelz, Bill Barretta, David Rudman, Matt Vogel, Kevin Clash, Artie Esposito, Peter Linz, Karen Prell et al joined in for the ride, while Muppets creator and former Disney chairman Jim Henson served as an executive producer and creative consultant. Clash and Barretta, along with Kirk Thatcher, were the showrunners, and Whitmire, Goelz, Clash, Barretta, Prell, and Vogel were frequent directors as well.
Like Too Late, Muppet Quiz sought to modernize the classic Muppet Show formula, with Kermit once again focusing on producing alongside Clifford, this time leaving hosting duties to affable piano-playing dog Rowlf [3], so he could focus on keeping the show from falling apart. This time, though, Muppet Quiz was more of a panel show in the vein of Match Game, with six different Muppets every week.
+
= Muppet Quiz
Every episode began with a short Muppet Show-like backstage skit of the two guest stars preparing for the show and interacting with a few of the panelists.
After the opening sequence (involving Kermit's traditional introduction of the guests in front of the KMUP station, followed by Rowlf singing the series' theme song as the show was being prepared, all six panelists being introduced during the song, and then Rowlf coming out on stage to a different, humorous introduction spiel that varied every episode), Rowlf bantered with the guests and some of the Muppets, before the gameplay began; the action took place on a set that parodied 1960s-1970s game shows such as Match Game, The Newlywed Game, and Password. Yes, they even used old-fashioned eggcrate displays instead of LED monitors.
Rowlf would ask six questions for both guest stars to answer (playing for points), and their responses were followed by the Muppets giving their two cents as well, usually leading to comedy skits or musical numbers from either the guests or the Muppets. Plus, quite a few skits ran on meta humor, including comments Rowlf made towards questions, as well as some lighthearted digs at Muppet corporate sibling NBC (Enby the Peacock even made a cameo appearance in one episode!) and even parent company Disney. If a guest got the question right, they would earn three points, with an additional point for each Muppet who also got it right. After each question, the show would cut to a scene taking place backstage, where Kermit would check in on what was happening.
Once all six questions were completed, the guest star with the most points would team up with a Muppet determined by the "Wheel! Of! Muppets!" The guest would then compete in a wacky final round with their Muppet competitor; for example, a cook-off with the Swedish Chef, a drum-off with the crazy drummer Animal, or a roast-off with resident critic duo Statler and Waldorf. If they got more points than the Muppet, they would win the round. Both guest stars came out on stage, along with some of the Muppets of that episode. After the credits, Statler and Waldorf gave one final comment a la The Muppet Show.
Of course, the best part was getting to see some classic Muppet antics on TV again after over a decade. Statler and Waldorf continued their usual brand of heckling from their front-row seats, Fozzie Bear told bad jokes for those two old coots to roast at like in the old days (they're practically a comedy trio at this point!), and Gonzo found new, insane yet cultured stunts to perform. Making his TV debut was Alvin (introduced in 2005), who acted as Rowlf's announcer/sidekick; he would sometimes join in the panel as well [4], though he was nothing compared to his energetic yet witty twin sister Audrey (also introduced in 2005). [5]
In Muppet tradition, the guest stars themselves each had their own skits as well, whether it's actor, voice actor and director Jude Barsi bonding with Uncle Deadly and Zondra, singer Ariana Grande attracting the jealousy of vain diva Miss Piggy simply for talking to Kermit backstage, or game show host Alex Trebek briefly taking over hosting duties from Rowlf before realizing that trying to get the Muppets under control is easier said than done. Who can forget well-known chef Gordon Ramsay trying to cook with the Swedish Chef, only for the Chef’s ineptitude and wackiness to frustrate Ramsay? Seriously, if this were a PFN reality show, he would've sworn up a storm. (“It's the bleepin’ Muppets! Families are bleepin’ watching!”) [6]
At the end of the day, much like how Too Late was a variety show dressed as a talk show, Muppet Quiz is a variety show dressed as a game show.
The series was a big hit among critics and audiences, running for six seasons before its final episode aired on May 24 last year. Clash, Barretta, and Thatcher did an admirable job maintaining the integrity of the characters, staying true to Henson’s intentions. We can only hope that the next Muppet series, whenever that comes, continues the tradition of success.
MUPPET PERFORMERS
Bill Barretta as Rowlf, Waldorf, Dr. Teeth, Pepe the King Prawn, the Swedish Chef (head and voice), Bobo the Bear, Sal Minella [7], Mahna Mahna, Big Mean Carl, and Other Muppets
Steve Whitmire as Kermit, Statler, Beaker, Rizzo the Rat, Lips, the Newsman, Link Hogthrob, Benny Bunny [8], Ubu, Andy Pig, Barry Stirr [9], the Swedish Chef (hands), and Other Muppets
Artie Esposito as Alvin and Other Muppets
Kevin Clash as Clifford, Mulch, Enby the Peacock, and Other Muppets
Eric Jacobson as Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Animal, Sam the Eagle, Marvin Suggs, and Other Muppets
Dave Goelz as Gonzo the Great, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Zoot, Beauregard, Digit, Chip, Randy Pig, and Other Muppets
David Rudman as Scooter, Janice, Wayne, and Other Muppets
Matt Vogel as Sgt. Floyd Pepper, Robin the Frog, Uncle Deadly, Sweetums, Dr. Julius Strangepork, Lew Zealand, Crazy Harry, Pops, Camilla, Angus McGonagle, and Other Muppets
Karen Prell as Audrey, Yolanda Rat, and Other Muppets
Peter Linz as Nigel the Conductor, Dr. Phil Van Neuter [10], and Other Muppets
Alice Dinnean as Wanda and Other Muppets
Leslie Carrara-Rudolph as Zondra, Spamela Hamderson, and Other Muppets
Julianne Buescher as Denise [11], Beverly Plume, and Other Muppets
Tyler Bunch as Thog and Other Muppets
Louise Gold as Annie Sue and Other Muppets
ADDITIONAL PERFORMERS
Grant Baciocco
Billy Barkhurst
Rickey Boyd
Wayne Brady
Kanja Chen
Frankie Cordero
Stephanie D'Abruzzo
Ryan Dillon
Ben Durocher
Ali J. Eisner
Bradley Freeman, Jr.
Aymee Garcia
Dan Garza
Leila Ghaznavi
Andy Hayward
John Kennedy
Donna Kimball
Tim Lagasse
Bruce Lanoil
Noel MacNeal
Drew Massey
Joey Mazzarino
Brett O'Quinn
Carmen Osbahr
Anney McKilligan Ozar
Martin P. Robinson
Yinan Shentu
John Tartaglia
Allan Trautman
Alex Villa
Victor Yerrid
[1] A pun on Tobey Maguire and Tom Holland's names.
[2] OTL's equivalent to The Muppets Studio. I'd personally imagine its logo to look like OTL's Jim Henson Pictures logo (go to 0:22).
[3] I had Rowlf be the host this time, because I wanted him to get his time in the spotlight again (he was the lead Muppet before The Muppet Show due to his fame as Jimmy Dean's TV sidekick). Kermit still plays a major role as the producer like in Too Late, and he's still the undeniable leader.
[4] Inspired by this episode of Match Game ‘75 in which Gary Burghoff (himself a substitute for Charles Nelson Reilly) missed the day's taping after forgetting about Daylight Savings’ Time, so announcer Johnny Olson filled in for him.
[5] A crude mockup of Wendy's appearance.
[6] OTL's equivalent.
[7] Basically OTL's Johnny Fiama as described in the Too Late with Miss Piggy entry.
[8] OTL's Bean Bunny.
[9] OTL's Joe the Legal Weasel.
[10] Brian Henson performed this role IOTL. Here, because of his other commitments, I gave Peter this role instead.
[11] The Whatnot, not the pig from OTL's 2015 series (whom Buescher coincidentally performed).
EDIT: Added Clifford as producer.
EDIT 2: Added mention of eggcrate displays.
EDIT 3: Elaborated on the opening.
EDIT 4: Added Denise the Whatnot from a Muppet Meeting Film and Muppets TV, plus Joe the Legal Weasel and Beverly Plume from OTL's Muppets Now. Honestly, I'd think Jim would encourage Disney to hire more new performers to create their own roles (e.g. Bill Barretta as Pepé), or make more obscure characters their own (e.g. Matt Vogel as Uncle Deadly, a character who only lasted a few years under Jerry Nelson, or how I gave Nigel to Peter Linz).
EDIT 5: Added Muppet Studios.
EDIT 6: Added Allan Trautman.
FINAL EDIT: Added Carmen Osbahr.
FINAL EDIT, FOR REAL THIS TIME: Replaced Joe the Legal Weasel with his TTL counterpart.
RETCON: I renamed Walter and Wendy to Alvin (Shockeye7665's suggestion) and Audrey, and cast Artie Esposito as Alvin. I realized that Walter's name and performer would be different due to butterflies.
Still Not Ready for Prime Time: The Most Underrated SNL Cast Members
Entertainment Weekly, November 3rd 2023
By Bill Chase
Guest post by @MNM041 and with assistance from @Plateosaurus
Saturday Night Live has certainly been a show that's had its fair share of ups and downs, hasn't it? The iconic sketch comedy series has pushed the envelope for years now, and provided both some of the best and worst examples of what sketch comedy can be. While some may claim the show has lost its luster in recent years or just isn't funny anymore, these recent cast members still show that SNL has some spark in there. These aren't going to talk about the usual suspects you see in these lists like Tina Fey, Jason Sudeikis, Kate McKinnon or Bill Hader. I'm here to focus on comedians who aren't nearly as talked about as they should be despite consistently being hilarious. Bear in my these are my opinions, so if you disagree, feel free to comment who you think deserves more love.
Paul Schrier(1997-2004)
Paul Schrier [1] first joined SNL's cast in 1997 and up until leaving in 2004, he remained one of the major players on the show. After impressing producers with both his stand up act, and his physical comedy chops, Schrier was first seen by many as an attempt to replicate the show had with Chris Farley, who actually hosted SNL the same year Schrier joined. While many of the earlier sketches Schrier did evoke that kind of Chris Farley-esque humor, as Schrier progressed on the show and got to bring in more of his own stoic comedic stylings, he really grew into his own.
An example of a sketch that really demonstrated his comedic ability was Meeting Her Parents [2], where Schrier played a father meeting his daughter's boyfriend who suddenly becomes very intimidating when his daughter leaves the room. The ability of Schrier (alongside that week's host Gillian Anderson playing his wife) to switch between corny dad and CIA interrogator is a stroke of comedic genius. Since leaving the show in 2004, Schrier has continued to be a consistently funny presence in both movies and TV, including his own sitcom, The Paul Schier Show.
Jason Narvy (1998-2005)
Well, since I just talked about Schier[3], I should probably talk about the man who essentially became the Laurel to his Hardy, Jason Narvy. Narvy first got the attention of Lorne Michaels after upon a recommendation from SNL alum Dana Carvey, who he had worked with on the film Who Is Alan Smithee?
After joining, Narvy quickly cemented himself as the definition of the all-star utility player during his time on the show. Able to essay deadpan commercial pitchmen like Phil Hartman, plumb the depths of deliberately irritating weirdos like Will Forte. Still, the stalwart Narvy shone in his roles, no matter the size, and his invaluable comic presence served him well afterward, though his tenure on the show is still often overlooked, possibly because his later work, such as his work on The Paul Schier Show and even later with his supporting role on Eight Simple Rules seemed to somehow eclipse his SNL. In fact when he returned to host in 2009, he said during his monologue, “I actually used to work here, but if you don't remember that, that's okay. Lorne doesn't either.”
Matt Kennedy Gould (2002 - 2012)
During his time on SNL, Matt Kennedy Gould[4] proved to just be one of those guys you can't help but root for. Prior to entering the New York comedy scene, Gould was a law school dropout living with his parents and delivering pizzas for a living[5]. After giving stand-up a try during an open mic night in February of 2001, Gould began performing at comedy clubs around New York before eventually catching the eye of Lorne Michaels in 2002.
Gould's first two years on Saturday Night Live saw him reliably cast in Average Joe roles that often saw him playing the straight man. However, Gould really came into his own in 2004, when Thuy Trang hosted to promote the second Resident Evil movie, during which Gould pitched a sketch about 9 to 5 office workers at the Umbrella Corporation. From there, Gould found himself often cast as characters where normality was the joke, which led to a certain Bill Murray style flavor to sketches. Gould left SNL in 2012, and immediately after was cast in the CBS sitcom Help Me, about a life coach trying to sell people rules for success, while feeling like his life is falling apart, and has returned to host twice.
Stephen Colbert (1996 - 2000)
Stephen Colbert[6] had of course been behind some of SNL’s most memorable moments during his time with the show. Colbert joined the show during season 18 and eventually ended up becoming the host of Weekend Update after Norm Macdonald and Colin Quinn both left. Stephen Colbert quickly proved himself to be a natural for the role, with quick wit and a penchant for world class satire, Colbert provided some of the smartest jokes from SNL.
Taking over as one of the anchors for weekend update, but Colbert did a lot more than salvage "Update" from a long losing streak — it swiftly became the highlight of the show, as the entire franchise remade itself around the wry, sardonic, style of Colbert. Beyond that, there are of course iconic sketches like The Ambiguously Gay Duo[6] which proved Colbert was just as funny away from the Weekend Update desk. Colbert has found a fair bit of success hosting The Tonight Show but has still found time to return to the show that brought him fame three times.
Stephanie Courtney(2001 - 2011)
Stephanie Courtney[7] has garnered a well deserved reputation as one of the funniest women in America. Joining SNL in 2001, Stephanie Courtney started on the writing staff before joining the main cast the following year and working as one of the hosts of Weekend Update the year after that. Courtney, alongside her longtime friend Tina Fey, have been involved in some of the funniest moments of the show, and become one of the most prolific performers ever when it comes to recurring characters. Courtney was so ubiquitous during her time on SNL that it's tempting to discount just how hilarious she was.
Courtney admittedly started with a very similar witty, not-afraid-of-her-brain style as Tina Fey but once she hit her stride it was a joy to watch. Whether she was playing a dissatisfied sitcom wife planning to kill her husband or playing future President Kathleen Sebelius during her time as Governor of Kansas. Apart from churning out the hits, however, Courtney was a fearless and nimble sketch performer and more than capable impressionist, seeing her virtually take over episodes with her sheer range. Even working among very strong casts during her seven seasons on the show, Courtney was a major star. It's just too bad we only realized it once she left. Thankfully, she's returned to SNL as host a grand total of five times, and alongside Tina Fey has helped pen the scripts for numerous hilarious movies over the years, many of which she also started in.
Donald Glover (2009 - 2013)
As time has gone on, it feels stranger and stranger to remember that Donald Glover[8] was on Saturday Night Live. The multi-platinum singer-songwriter’s career at SNL started after several sketches he made with friends Dominic Dierkes and DC Pierson were seen by producers, resulting in the three being given opportunities to audition for SNL. While the trio all found jobs at NBC Donald Glover would end up being the one whose big break came on SNL.
His major hits left audiences bowled over, the irresistible weirdness and energy simply sweeping them along to wherever this young comic had in mind to take them. A major highlight being his brief time playing Vice President Barack Obama alongside Kate McKinnon. In stacked and varied casts during his time on the show, Glover more than held his own, displaying a star wattage (even while playing a literal dancing sidekick) that's gone on to serve him especially well since leaving in 2013. Glover only returned to host once 2015, but maybe that's about as much as you can expect from a man who stays as busy as he does.
Hal Sparks (2001 - 2009)
In many ways, it almost makes too much sense that Hal Sparks, a comedian who was once described as a “white, heavy metal Chris Rock”[9], would end up joining the cast of SNL. Sparks also came in at a point where that kind of bite was really needed on SNL, with his impression of President John Heinz seemingly being his most lasting impact on the show.
During his eight years on the show, Sparks exhibited a knowingness that turned his sketches into winking star vehicles with an almost Bill Murray like charm. It was always way too easy to take this laid-back gent for granted, but Sparks on live TV was an irrepressible mix of rubber-faced energy and utter commitment to the bit, with a sideline in creditable impressions. After leaving the show, Sparks found reliable work in the sitcom Single Parents, which featured fellow SNL alumni Tim Meadows, and has also returned to host once and made three separate guest appearances.
Toni Russell (2015 - 2019)
The New Zealand born comic who at one point aspired to be a professional wrestler[10], Toni Russell quickly garnered praise for committing to every single character she was ever given. Russell's most notable character from her time on SNL would likely be her Golden Age Starlet character, a delightfully over-the-top parody of Hollywood's “Blonde Bombshell” character from the Golden Age of Hollywood which popped on Weekend Update on occasion whenever entertainment news was discussed. Russell's commitment to her performances has led to her reputation as an incredible psychical comedian.
A fetching and hilarious combination of performing fearlessness and relatable vulnerability, Toni Russell was as easy to love as she was impossible not to root for. Audiences gravitated to the young comic in droves, with Russell's star rising the more airtime she got to take her performance-based silliness to even goofier heights. Russell can nowadays be found in the dramady series Long Distance and in the upcoming film Date Night.
Olivia Taylor Dudley (2011 - 2021)
Quick witted and never afraid to laugh at herself, Olivia Taylor Dudley was someone who was practically made for SNL. Joining in 2012, Dudley was cast based on a series of sketches she and a group of fellow actors had posted online [11]. She first appeared on the show through Weekend Update, taking over the role of the Devil from Jason Sudikis after he left the show and playing the Prince (or rather Princess in this case) with the same amount of mischievous glee as her predecessor.
Blessed with a fearsome theatricality and a sweetly silly demeanor, Dudley slipped assuredly into every role with an infectious energy and a mischievous glint. While an expert at playing insecure teens and tweens with a delicate comic sensitivity, Dudley clearly relished knocking broader characters into the cheap seats. She remains one of the most multi-talented women in the show's history — and also among its longest-running female cast members. Dudley had already made regular appearances in movies during her run on SNL, most notably playing Betty in the 2013 satirical film Archie Can Go To Hell, and can now be seen on the show Keeping It Together alongside Judy Greer. She's yet to host the show yet, but only time will tell whether that remains the case.
John Patrick Douglass (2011 - 2019)
Ever since his film school days, John Patrick Douglass wanted to be on TV, with SNL[12] in particular being something he aspired to reach. Douglass quickly proved himself to be a chameleon on SNL, being whatever a sketch needed him to be, whether that meant he was the everyman or a complete sociopath.
With his unassuming East Coast handsomeness, Douglass threatens to get lost in the shuffle of blandly handsome SNL white guys — until he doesn't. While gamely playing the many comedy Everyman roles his general appearance and demeanor suggest him for, Douglass loved leaning into the strange as much as costars, his grinning cheekiness putting his own unique spin on the proceedings. After his time at SNL came to an end, Douglass briefly hosted the short lived revival of the series Double Dare, a fitting place for Douglass as his first sketch featured him doing an impression of it's original host, Alex Trebek which was probably one of the more talked about parts of his time on the show, but has since returned to acting, featuring in the 2021 comedy We Just Broke Up.
Mike Trapp (2012 - 2018)
It's not that Mike Trapp[13] wasn't a valuable and integral part of the ensemble during his six seasons on the show. It's more that certain writer-performers are so singular in their comic style and vision that they carve out an easily identifiable yet impossible-to-encapsulate niche on the show that brings a whole other element to the SNL mix. A Mike Trapp sketch is often an exercise in escalating irritation, a comedy of manners where his character's out-there nature disrupts audience comfort and expectation. Chameleonic in appearance and manner, Trapp could play it straight as well, but is best known for characterizations that skirt insufferableness, often to the point where the premise circles around again to begrudging hilarity.
Thankless roles like ever-present game show hosts became, in Trapp's hands, the main attraction of sketches, with his ability to imbue potentially bland characters with hilarious inner life elevating everything he appeared in. Mike Trapp hasn't been as present on our screens as many of his fellow cast members, though he has appeared in the Blockbuster Direct series Limbo, which he also writes for.
Dan Folger (2008 - 2016)
When Chris Farley returned to host SNL in 2009, he reportedly turned to Dan Folger[14] after the curtain call and said, “I like you. You're like me if I didn't have a coke problem.” High praise given that Farley was the man who made the Brooklyn based comedian want to join SNL in the first place. Like Farley, Folgler barreled into Saturday Night Live so amped up with the boisterous comic energy that made him a star in the New York comedy scene that he promptly turned himself into the SNL wild man of a new generation. And Folger was wild, crashing through tables, cramming himself into ungainly costumes, and going full red-faced dynamo mode all in pursuit of every last laugh in the building. And he got them, with audiences taking to the baby-faced, burly comic with a passion seldom seen before or since.
Not only was he wild, Folger was downright ballsy at times. Who could forget when Sam Kinson hosted in 2012, and Folger did his now famous impression of Kinson to the face of the legendary comedian? But towards the end of Folgers tenure with the show, he also let us see a calmer side of himself, such as his portrayal of Jim Henson in 2012. Since leaving the show, Folger famously was the hand picked choice to play Sam Kinson in the biopic Brother Sam.
Amber Ruffin (2014 - 2020)
Amber Ruffin’s career on SNL began as being on the writing staff[15] for several years before officially becoming part of the cast in 2014. In an era where black women in comedy were often unfairly overlooked, Ruffin stood out and stole scenes whenever she had the chance.
Genial and boisterous, Ruffin matured into a show-anchoring Everyman during her six years on SNL, all while mastering a razor-sharp underplaying style that counterbalances his performer's urge to go big. In a congested cast where faces get lost in the crowd — who can forget the game show "New Cast Member or Arcade Fire?" — Ruffin always managed to be memorable. Not long after her tenure was up, Ruffin was hand picked by Conan O'Brien to be the new host of Late Night where the magnetic comedian has continued to make us laugh ever since.
Anna Marie Tendler (2014 - 2020)
Anna Marie Tendler’s career in comedy becomes all the more fascinating when you learn she essentially picked it up as a side hustle. She originally worked as a makeup artist and hairdresser for NBC[16], and ended up getting into stand-up as a result of a failed relationship with SNL writer John Mulaney[17]. Funnily enough, her call to join the cast of SNL only came after her ex left the writing staff.
An inveterate performer, Tendler gave off a sense of perpetual people-pleasing, and the results were undeniably popular and hilarious, as the laughs echoed throughout her sketches. Tendler was always dauntingly versatile, yet loose and cool. Tendler’s consummate dedication to her characterizations made what could have been rote topical sketches into deft and arresting character pieces. Tendler kept a fairly low profile since leaving SNL, until recently when it was announced she'd make her film debut being alongside friend and fellow SNL alumni John Patrick Douglass in We Just Broke Up.
Brad Williams (2010 - 2014)
Since the early days of his career, Brad Williams has been a comedian who believes people should be able to laugh at themselves. Williams had the distinction of being the first comedian with dwarfism to be part of SNL’s cast, and Williams proved to be a force to be reckoned with. Always game to tell a short joke at his own expense, but simultaneously refusing to let that be the only joke in sketches he was in.
Like any SNL star worth their airtime, Williams fashioned big, brassy characters for himself, often fashioning sketches for himself based on his own experiences, such as his participation in the Special Olympics[18], Williams would have the audience bursting with laughter before the camera even panned down to him. No one could hold the camera's gaze as wildly and fearlessly as Williams, the outsized yet contained madness of his characters courting audience confusion as much as laughter. Williams has since released four stand-up specials since leaving and his memoir Fun Size is set for release next month.
Henry Cho (1999 - 2006)
In 1997, Henry Cho found himself traveling up to New York to perform at comedy clubs, having already found success in his home state of Tennessee[19]. While there, he ended up catching the eye of Conan O'Brien, who had spent several years as a writer for SNL. With Conan’s endorsement, Cho found himself getting an audition for SNL becoming the first Asian American cast member in 1998[20]. While initially, some found Cho to be out of place, with TV critic James Poniewozik writing that Cho “felt more like someone who should be part of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour than on Saturday Night Live.” Cho eventually found his place in the cast, and the show was better for it.
One of the few performers to ever overcome Lorne Michaels' restrictions on ad-libbing, Cho had no ego — just the will to try anything. This allowed Cho to be the Hartman-like glue for the cast over his near decade on the show, while his easy professionalism and charisma always proved to be an invaluable asset. Much like Paul Schrier, Cho was tapped to headline his own sitcom not long after he left SNL, which he also wrote for, basing it on his own upbringing.
Julie Baker (2012 - 2022)
Sometimes, it's not even clear if Julie Baker[21] knows how she got on SNL, but her presence has been a welcome one since she joined. A comedy powerhouse in a precise, petite package, Julie Baker was the unquestioned centerpiece of Saturday Night Live for most of her decade on the show. Baker had a talent for both the roles of all-important Weekend Update anchor, which allowed her trademark snark to shine through especially when paired with Michael Che and as the featured commentator, traditionally an exercise in seizing upon one trait and mining it for every laugh available, with Baker turning types inside out and finding nothing but insightful laughs.
She could do warmth, yet was always buzzing with a real don't-mess-with-me hostility never far from the surface. The ultimate pro — the way she read and responded to the people around her raised everybody's game. In addition to releasing her book, Recovering Journalism Student, and her new stand-up special, Is This Too Personal? is set to release next month.
Jim Meskimen (2009 - 2020)
Jim Meskimen[22] was probably one of the only men who could be viewed as a successor to Phil Hartman, often the glue that held sketches together. He was also one of the greatest impersonations guy in SNL history — his impressions were usually darker and more compelling characters than the originals. Her impression of Jeb Bush in particular made Bush look like a coldhearted bastard surrounded by a bunch of needy kids.
The consummate impressionist technician, Hammond came to Saturday Night Live and became the show's premiere celebrity impersonator for more than a decade. Older than his castmates, he brought with him a kind of professionalism that the show needed and was a welcome addition to the show. During his long tenure, Jim Meskimen was the man who provided a glue for the other cast members to work around, but still managed to be laugh out loud funny when he wanted to be. Meskimen’s memoir Impress Me just released last year, and he can be seen in the upcoming documentary Live From New York releasing on Smithsonian TV.
[1] This has been established before, but since Schrier never played Bulk on Power Rangers, he became an LA based comedian and ended up auditioning for SNL.
[2] In OTL, this was a sketch from the infamous episode Steve Seagal hosted.
[3] Credit to @TheMolluskLingers for this idea.
[4] Not a comedian in OTL, rather he ended up being the subject of The Joe Schmoe Show, which was essentially a crueler version of Jury Duty. Given what happened in the aftermath of his time on that show, I wrote this mostly because he deserved better.
[5] This is also true of Gould IOTL.
[6] Credit to @Plateosaurus for this idea. Stephen Colbert actually did get an opportunity to audition for SNL but was turned away.
[7] Stephanie Courtney, probably known to most as Flo from Progressive, actually got her start in the stand up comedy scene. Here she ends up getting the attention of Lorne Michaels, butterflying those annoying commercials out of existence.
[8] Glover, like Colbert, was also given an opportunity to audition for SNL but was also turned down.
[9] Actual quote used in advertisements for Hal Sparks’ comedy special Charmageddon. Sparks becoming an SNL cast member also likely changes his career trajectory, taking him off of shows like Queer as Folk, assuming that even still gets made.
[10] IOTL, Russell is a professional wrestler, having wrestled for both WWE and AEW under the name Toni Storm. I mostly decided to have her go into comedy because she genuinely has great chops for it, and also because I feel like WWE's ugly downfall would lead to some OTL wrestlers taking alternate paths.
[11] These sketches are similar to OTL's 5SecondFilms.
[12] Douglass is of course known IOTL as the YouTuber Jacksfilms, and my decision to include him was based on the fact that he once jokingly referenced a desire to be on SNL during one of his videos.
[13] Trapp is of course a member of the YouTube sketch channel CollegeHumor. Similar to Olivia Taylor Dudley, he ends up getting noticed after sketches he posted with a similar comedy troupe get the attention of NBC executives.
[14] Folger ends up getting noticed by executives after winning several contests as an impressionist, as well as his stand up act.
[15] IOTL, Amber Ruffin actually auditioned for SNL after the show received backlash for not having any black women in the cast. While those exact circumstances don't happen, random butterflies result in Amber joining the writers staff and later becoming a cast member.
[16] IOTL, Tendler worked as a hairstylist throughout New York City. Similar to OTL, this eventually leads to her making a few celebrity connections, which here results in her working for NBC and SNL.
[17] Cards on the table, this idea was admittedly somewhat inspired by a recent binge of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. I should also note that Tendler and Mulaney never end up married, which at this point I think would been better for both of them.
[18] Actual fact about Williams, that he's mentioned in his stand up act.
[19] Henry Cho is an Asian American comedian whose act takes a lot of inspiration from his particular life experiences, namely that he's an Asian from the south. Part of the reason he's given an audition beyond just Conan finding him funny is because NBC thinks he'd give them a chance to reach both Asian American audiences and more blue collar audiences.
[20] IOTL, this distinction goes to Bowen Yang, but since the 90s provided more opportunities for Asian Americans ITTL, SNL ended up having its first Asians cast members 20 years before it did IOTL.
[21] IOTL, Baker is actually a News Anchor. I was inspired to add her to this by a comment under one of the videos on her TikTok account.
[22] OTL, Jim Meskimen is mostly known as an impressionist who is often a voice double for various famous actors.
Chapter 8: Hey, Dudes! This is No Cartoon...
Excerpt from From Dover to Turtle Power!: The Extensive History of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles[1] by Morgana Fata.
The show was immensely popular by around 1988, but then came a curveball. 1989 would see the release of Batman on the big-screen, directed by Sam Raimi.
Mark Freedman[2], who had been in licensing long enough to know how quickly a property’s fortune could change, felt that the Turtles needed to keep up, and for good reason.
“The show was, arguably, the hottest thing in the market in it’s first two years, but Batman in 1989 really was a massive hit for Warner Bros. Retail stores were immediately starting to back off orders on anything Turtles, and started stocking up on Batman. Kids were wearing Batman shirts, lugging around lunchboxes with Batman logos, you name it. Everywhere in 1989, even before the film’s release, was Batman. And immediately, I knew that we were going to need a movie to keep the Turtles going”.
At around this time, Freedman had been introduced by the watermelon-smashing comedian Gallagher and his producing partner, Kim Dawson. Initially, they pitched a comedy movie, with actors like John Candy playing the Turtles, but Freedman didn’t want to go down that route and make that kind of movie.
Gallagher and Dawson then introduced him to another producer, Tom Gray, who worked for the legendary Hong Kong production company Golden Harvest, who had introduced audiences across the world to the likes of Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan. Gray was the perfect person to ensure that a Ninja Turtles movie would include plenty of real ninja action.
Soon, Golden Harvest approached Limelight Entertainment to co-produce the film, with Limelight founder and director Steve Barron initially tapped to serve as director. Known for directing music videos for A-ha, David Bowie, Michael Jackson and Dire Straits, as well as directing a couple of episodes of Jim Henson’s The Storyteller for Disney’s World of Magic and later, Tim Burton’s Nocturns, it was apparent that Steve Barron’s experience in the field of cutting-edge animatronics, to bring the Turtles to life in a live-action film, was required.
That meant that a deal was needed with Jim Henson, who was the Chief Creative Officer of Disney at the time. But with the success of the show and the toyline, in addition to the box office success of He Man in 1987, major film studios were starting to put out bids for the film rights to the franchise. Walt Disney Pictures, Columbia, Universal, Paramount, Warner Bros and Orion Pictures were all contenders, whilst Hollywood Pictures, United Artists and TriStar were “not interested”[3].
It eventually came to a close contest between Disney, Warner and Paramount, but in the end, Disney won not just the film rights, but the theme park rights.
The story of how the Turtles came to Disney, started with Steve Barron, who made a call with Jim Henson’s son, Brian Henson, who had voiced and performed the Storyteller’s Dog in The Storyteller, and was now working as an imagineer in Disney’s Creatureworks, a subsidiary under Walt Disney’s Imagineering Workshop formed from a merger between Jim Henson’s Creature Shop and Disney’s own studio practical effects group, to figure out how to bring the Turtles to life.
“Although initial discussions were good between me and Steve, on how to do the Turtles in live-action, I was somewhat made aware by Steve that the film rights were being contested by other film studios. If they had gotten the film rights, Steve was worried about not being able to get the participation of the Creatureworks. So, after Steve talked with a few individuals working at Fantasia Films, Hyperion Pictures and MGM, and with dad’s approval, Disney was effectively bidding for the film and won,” recalls Brian.
After Disney had won the bidding, discussion soon turned to what kind of movie was going to be made, and even more importantly, who was going to direct, for even despite Jim and Brian putting in a good word for him, Disney executives were not sold entirely on Barron directing, given that his only film credit was 1984’s Electric Dreams, and instead wanted someone more experienced to direct a potential hit.
With Ron Howard, Frank Oz and Tim Burton among many other directors declining the offer to direct, Disney chose Robert Zemeckis, director of the Back to the Future films, to direct the film.
Initially reluctant to get to work on another film, especially one this close to the finishing up of filming the last two BTTF films, filmed back to back, Zemeckis remembers what changed his mind.
“The animatronics, basically! I always loved the latest in special effects, and by around 1989, the Henson Creature Shop (as Disney’s Creatureworks was still informally known) was at the very top of that field”.
Zemeckis and Barron partnered together, with Barron being made 2nd unit director, while Brian was made “Chief Puppeteer”[4], and they set to getting to work.
Freedman recalls that he made it clear to Zemeckis and Jim Henson in one of the meetings, that the film would need to be a different experience from the show, “The film had to be different, otherwise you could just basically watch the Turtles at home. So why would anyone spend money to see something that they’ve already seen on Television?”
Zemeckis recalled, “All I knew about the Turtles was the cartoon, pretty much. And my first attempt of trying to prepare a film about the Turtles was just watching a couple of episodes on TV. But then, during one meeting, Mark [Freedman] told me and Jim about the original comics that the show was based on, and thus arranged a meeting between the both of us, and Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird to discuss the film”.
Heading up to Mirage Comics over in Northampton[5], the two of them met Kevin and Peter, to which both Jim Henson and Robert Zemeckis were amazed at how different the comics were from the show, examining all the various issues of the Mirage comics.
Soon, with many issues of the original comics noted for research, Zemeckis had the material ready to make the film, and Jim got along well with Kevin and Peter, especially since Jim was made aware that they knew Dave Sim, who Jim was in early discussions in making a Cerebus movie[6].
“On the way back to LA, I discovered that in one of the comic books they had given to Bob [Zemeckis] as research, Kevin and Peter had made a sketch of Raphael pointing his finger in that sort of “Uncle Sam Wants You” pose, saying, ‘Bob, Jim. You make a good movie, or else! Grrrrr…..’. It was quite such a good drawing and I suppose it was their way of giving their blessing to us to make the movie”, Jim remembered about that meeting[7].
Everything was in place. With Golden Harvest Entertainment Company and Limelight Entertainment producing and Disney’s Fantasia Films label distributing the film, it was up to Zemeckis, Barron and the rest of the team to make the film.
Zemeckis immediately set to work on the story with Todd Langen and Bobby Herbeck, with much of the original comics as their inspiration for the story[8], while making the choice to keep a few elements of the original cartoon in (namely the multi-coloured head bands of the Turtles from the animated series, their love of pizza, elements of Michelangelo’s and April’s character as well as the appearance of Burne Thompson), while Brian and his team set to work on getting the Turtles to life.
Eastman and Laird visited the set and approved of the direction being taken, and both felt the story was a good balance between the early comics, while containing elements of the animated series that would allow people to accept the film.
With a budget of $19.3 million, which was less than Batman’s $48 million[9], the film would need to spend it’s money carefully, especially since filming began in July 1989, mere weeks after Batman’s theatrical release and with a planned March/April release date for next year, they only had two months of filming to complete[10].
A tremendous task for Zemeckis, especially since filming for the last two Back to the Future movies was also taking place[11]. But luckily, Barron and Brian stepped in to help “shoulder the burden” for Zemeckis, an act that he never forgot.
Filming took place on the Disney soundstages in Burbank, California, as well as location shots in New York City itself and in upstate New York for the farm scenes.
No major stars would be playing the Turtles, for as far as the young audiences would be concerned, the Turtles themselves would be the stars.
Even then, no single person would solely be behind the performance of each individual Turtle. There were primarily at least three people involved in each Turtle. There was the in-suit performer, who would wear the suit, Dave Foreman, Leif Tilden and Michelan Sisti. An facial assistant who would operate the waldo, operating the Turtle’s face, Martin P. Robinson, David Rudman, David Greenaway and Mak Wilson. And a voice actor. Brian Tochi, who was one of the most prolific East Asian child actor of the 70s and 80s, would voice Leonardo, while Robbie Rist from The Brady Brunch voiced Michelangelo, Adam Carl voiced Donatello[12] and Josh Pais, who not only voiced Raphael (giving him an iconic Brooklyn accent) but also wore the suit. In some cases, stunt performers wore the suits like Ernie Reyes Jr. (who had replaced a Hong Kong stuntman initially doing Donatello’s stunts when he got injured[13]) and Kenn Troum. And professional skateboarder Reggie Barnes doubled for Michelangelo for the skateboarding stunts in the sewers[14].
Performance between the puppeteer operating the animatronics and the suit performer, was a major challenge, as Josh Pais explains, “While wearing the head, you had a radio within, that would allow you and your puppeteer to communicate through the scene and essentially, work in sync together. We would spend hours and hours together, doing lines simultaneously in order to make our lines in sync with each other”.
Then came the challenge of making Master Splinter (voiced by Kevin Clash, known as the Muppet performer for Elmo on the iconic educational children's show Sesame Street), from the pages of the comics, straight to the big screen.
“After Peter Brooke found a way to sculpt him from the comics, straight into a film character”, Brian recalls, “we had to animate him with at least 3 to 4 people. Kevin [Clash], who did the voice, operated him, sitting inside of his torso, moving his mouth with one hand, while Robert Tygner and Rickey Boyd worked on the facial animatronics, and another puppeteer operated his arms, which were mechanical. And this all meant we had to ensure that Kevin was out of shot of the camera. It was quite fortunate that for a lot of Splinter’s scenes, Splinter was always stationary, whenever sitting down or imprisoned on the wall or standing in a fixed position. Whenever we had to have Splinter moving, we had the impression of him being moved by other characters or have Kevin’s legs out of the shot of the camera”.
Soon, the Creatureworks turned their attention onto the Turtles themselves, developing two kinds of suits.
“We had the Stunt Turtles, in which the Hong Kong stuntmen wore as they did their martial arts and combat moves”, said Brian. “They did very good martial art work, even in the suits which were basically containing a multitude of foam rubber within it. However the foam rudder did help in acting as padding, so no one could get really badly hurt”.
Then, there were the Hero Turtles, which were used for close-ups and dialogue, with the infamous Henson Performance Control System (otherwise known as the "waldo") controlling the facial expressions, mouth and eye movements in the head.
“There were about thirty motors powering all that. All of them were hidden in the shells, thus making the shell essentially an effective backpack. Thank goodness for the characters being turtles. This meant we didn’t have to worry about making the head too large. The motors were connected via cables which ran right up the back of the neck into the heads of the Turtles. But it was rather tricky, as they all had to work wirelessly with the waldo”, says Brian. “This may sound relatively easy by nowadays, but back in 1989, the idea that a signal could be transmitted into a creature, with no wire whatsoever, was relatively new. Luckily, Hackle in Labyrinth and the Dog in The Storyteller essentially were early versions of this idea. They weren’t at the levels of the Turtles, but at least, they were a good place to start and better than starting from scratch”.
With so much fledgling technology around, constant maintenance was a daily reality on set, necessitating an army of technicians on hand to make repairs and adjustments.
Zemeckis remembers, “Much of the filming took place in the midst of summer, with high temperatures whenever we were in LA or in upstate New York, with many of the suit performances sweating buckets in the suits that weighed around 50 pounds and had to keep hydrated at least a gallon of water a day, all just to keep hydrated. And I thought I had the harder job! Much credit to Dave, Leif, Michelan, Josh, Ernie, Kenn and all the stuntmen who put up with wearing those suits”.
Michelan Sisti, the suit performer for Michelangelo, remembers the struggles of filming in the suits.
“Not only did the suit weigh so much, but in the warm temperatures, the suit would be soaking up all our sweat, increasing it’s weight to around sixty/seventy pounds. Of course, shooting days that had heavy fighting scenes or major stuntwork required that we stay within our suits most and all of the time. You can only imagine how much physical work it was to be a Turtle, but I wouldn’t have missed a single moment of it for anything”.
Josh Pais on the other hand, found wearing the turtle head to be claustrophobic for him and would immediately remove it after filming wrapped.
Zemeckis had the Turtles work out a schedule in order to get their filming done as much as possible, while ensuring their safety and health.
“The Turtle performers and their puppeteers all woke up at around 6:00am”, Zemeckis states. “Then after a quick breakfast, the suit performers would get suited up, before rehearsing on set, with the puppeteers reading the lines and rehearsing with the performers to get in sync with each other. The first suit up, the performers’ suits were incomplete, mainly Turtle suit legs right down to the knee over skintight shorts, with harnesses and various other bits attached as well. Then the second suit up, the performers would put on the suit fully, minus the head and rehearse the scene again, before finally, putting on the head for a final rehearsal before filming started. Over time, as filming progressed, the performers grew so adept that they went straight to the whole “putting the head on” phase, which sped up the progress. To help keep the temperatures down, much of the film was shot at nighttime, or at least, in the early hours of the morning as those were when the temperatures were at their lowest, but when filming in the day, we had cold tents established, for times when the performers needed to rest, in between shots”.
In regards to the film’s live action actors, Nicole Kidman was cast as April O’Neil, beating out Judith Hoag, Jennifer Beals, Lorraine Bracco, Sandra Bullock, Melanie Griffith, Brook Shields, Marisa Tomei and Sean Young for the role[15], while Elias Koteas was cast as Casey Jones.
The Shredder, the film’s main antagonist, was portrayed by James Saito, with Toshishiro Obata as Tatsu, the Shredder’s second in command (both of them dubbed by David McCharen and Michael McConnohie), while Jay Patterson was cast as the dismissive Police Commissioner of the NYPD Charles Pennington, Raymond Serra was cast as Channel 6 News boss Burne Thompson, Michael Turney as troubled teen and Foot Clan recruit Danny, Sam Rockwell as a head Foot Clan thug, while Skeet Ulrich and Scott Wolf made uncredited appearances as Foot Clan thugs[16].
Even the suit performers got to make cameos, with Dave Foreman, Kenn Troum and Ernie Reyes Jr as various Foot Clan members, Leif Tilden as the Foot Clan messenger who threatens April, Michelan Sisti as the pizza delivery boy and Josh Pais as the taxi cab passenger with Kevin Eastman making a cameo as the taxi driver[17].
As for Peter Laird, an offer for a cameo was made to him, but he politely declined, “I’m not comfortable doing the whole cameo thing, really”.
With filming wrapped, post-production began and already, problems emerged. Golden Harvest did not like the editing of editor Sally Menke and tried to have her removed[18], but Zemeckis stepped in and made it clear to them that he would not tolerate her removal at what he called “such a crucial stage”. So, knowing that Zemeckis had Disney's backing and would raise a bigger stink if they pushed further, Golden Harvest relented.
Composer Alan Silvestri provided the film’s score while various artists such as MC Hammer, Hi Tek 3 and Partners in Kryme made contributions to the film's soundtrack, with the later releasing the single Turtle Power!, which reached number one on the UK Singles Chart for four weeks after it’s release in April 1990, making it the first hip hop single to reach number one in the United Kingdom and becoming the 13th-highest-selling single of the year in the United Kingdom, while peaking at number 13 on the US Billboard Hot 100[19].
An week before the film released, Mark Freedman held a special screening for his partners at Playmates Toys. Much to his surprise, they hated it’s darker tone, and Freedman was convinced that the film would bomb.
But on the day of the film’s release, March 30th, 1990, Freedman and his wife, who were attending because “somebody had to show up to this movie”, soon found themselves surprised when more and more people started attending, to the point that the line reached all around the theatre.
The film would earn around $135 million in North America, and over $66 million outside North America (where in the UK, the film would face severe censorship, just like with the animated cartoon before it. The word “Ninja” was replaced with hero, both on the film title and the song Turtle Power!, while Michelangelo’s nunchaku were removed, with his infamous show-off duel omitted[20]), for a worldwide total of over $200 million.
Pizza Hut would collaborate on a $20 million marketing campaign (despite that in the film, Domino’s Pizza was ordered by the Turtles).
And even more rewarding for all those involved, the film won the Academy Award for Best Visual Effects, beating out The Hunt for Red October, Tremors, Dick Tracy and even fellow Disney film Hooked![21].
As big as the previous two years had been for the Turtles, 1990 had effectively become the year of the Turtle. [1] Based of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Ultimate Visual History by Andrew Farago. Very fascinating read on the franchise and includes segments with Brian Henson, particularly on the first Turtle film.
[2] Founder of Surge Licensing, a licensing corporation started in 1986, which had took on Mirage Studios as it’s first client. Mark Freedman had discovered the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles though Kevin Siembieda of Palladium Books (who had developed Role-playing games for the TMNT), pitched them as a toy line to Playmates Toys, which lead to the Murakami-Wolf-Swenson animated series in 1987, which Mark Freedman was a producer of.
[3] In OTL, Walt Disney Pictures, Columbia Pictures, Universal Pictures, MGM/UA, Orion Pictures, 20th Century Fox, Paramount and Warner Bros. would turn down distributing the film, because, despite the popularity of the cartoon and the toy line, they thought the film was going to fall, due to the failure of 1987’s Masters of the Universe in OTL, thus the only distributor would be New Line Cinema (known then for the A Nightmare on Elm Street series, and mainly low-budget B movies and arthouse fare). Paramount would later acquire the franchise via Viacom (Paramount Global as of 2022) in 2009 after Laird sold it to them. With He Man succeeding in this timeline a bit more than it’s OTL counterpart due to casting Brian Thompson as the titular character rather than Dolph Lundgren, the TMNT franchise gets more film studios bidding for the film rights.
[4] In the OTL film, Brian Henson was second unit director as well as chief puppeteer.
[5] Northampton, in Massachusetts, is also a setting in the TMNT universe, where the Turtles reside in the original Mirage comics, starting from the end of Issue #10 “Silent Partner”. And from then on, whenever a TMNT adaptation has the Turtles leaving New York after being forced to leave, they usually reside on a farm (either the Jones farm or the O’Neil farm) in Northampton, Massachusetts (sometimes, it’s based in rural New York state). In Issue #14 “The Unmentionables”, there’s even an in-joke, in which Casey Jones passes Mirage Comics.
[6] Dave Sim, creator of Cerebus, collaborated with Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird as they were big fans of him and Cerebus (for they had much in common, being self-publishing comic book cartoonists), with the Turtles and Cerebus having a crossover issue in 1986. And the mention of the Cerebus film is in reference to this.
[7] During a meeting with Peter Laird, Kevin Munroe, director of 2007’s TMNT movie, says that instead of getting a signature in his Eastman & Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Issue #1 that he had brought along with him (for he wanted at least Peter’s signature if he didn’t get the job directing the fourth movie), Peter Laird had made a sketch of Raph saying a response just like this. The whole “Uncle Sam Wants You pose” that I included, is inspired by J. M. Flagg’s Uncle Sam WW1 poster.
[8] In this version of the film, there is more of a plot, in which Shredder recruits troubled teens into the Foot Clan, has them thieving and a silent crime wave, but the Shredder’s thieving is more purposeful, in that he is developing devices to destroy the foundations of buildings in New York City in order to collapse them and thus hold the city to ransom (inspired by Baxter Stockman’s plot in Issue #2 of the Mirage comics) and many of the first film’s deleted scenes are included, and that Danny is not related to April’s boss, but is acquainted with Casey due to coming from the same neighbourhood, plus the fight between the Turtles and the Shredder takes place at the Foot's base, after the Turtles foil the Shredder's plot and go to find Splinter. The film closes with April O'Neil making a TV report about the night's events (not mentioning the Turtles mind you, but giving subtle hints), which the Turtles celebrate and try and find a catchphrase, with Splinter recommending "cowabunga", before "I made a funny!"
[9] In OTL, the film’s budget was around $13.5 million, roughly one-third of what Tim Burton’s Batman had cost.
[10] Same as the OTL movie.
[11] Filming for Back to the Future Part II and III took place in between February 1989 and January 1990.
[12] With the death of Corey Feldman in TTL, Adam Carl (who voiced Donatello in TMNT II: The Secret of the Ooze) takes on the voice of Donatello.
[13] Just like in OTL.
[14] True! Except in the OTL movie, he doubled for Donatello.
[15] Nicole Kidman, Jennifer Beals, Lorraine Bracco, Sandra Bullock, Melanie Griffith, Brook Shields, Marisa Tomei and Sean Young were all considered for the role of April before Judith Hoag was cast.
[16] Yep, all true!
[17] Kevin Eastman’s cameo in the OTL film isn’t seen at all. So I gave him a bit more of a visible one, as the taxi driver who remarks on Raphael chasing Casey when he passes him.
[18] Yep, in OTL, Sally Menke was removed for those same reasons. It’s a bit of a shame that we never got to see the movie if she had stayed on.
[19] Yeah, I introduced a Robert Zemeckis collaborator here for the film score, replacing OTL’s John Du Prez, and those Turtle Power facts are true as per OTL.
[20] Oh yes, welcome to 80s/90s Britain, when the TMNT cartoon was edited into a wholly completely different show! Seriously, you couldn’t have anyone saying ninja back then, hence why the UK version of the cartoon was Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles! It was why the show removed the weapons from the series entirely in the fourth season in order to make the show more appropriate for the international airings, and thus the weapons were replaced with the “Turtle Line”. Because nunchaku were heavily censored and in the second TMNT movie, Mikey basically had to use sausages in their place! And oddly enough, for the film's UK release, the BBFC actually removed all shots of Mikey using sausages, because according to them, any "streetwise 8 year old" would actually be influenced to use sausages in the place of nunchaku. I'm not joking!
[21] At OTL’s 63rd Academy Awards in 1991, Total Recall won the award for Best Visual Effects, when it was an Special Achievement Academy Award.
It can’t be argued the Muppets are the most far-reaching TV stars in television history. Since Jim Henson first created a show about zany, surreal puppets for a local Washington D.C. station in 1955, and the Walt Disney Entertainment Company’s 1984 acquisition of the Muppets, they have conquered a variety of genres in movies and TV.
Now, they’re bent on conquering the morning show with their new NBC series, Good Muppet Morning!, which will ironically premiere tonight on NBC and Disney Direct. (In fact, there are hints that this entire show is actually being held late in the evening in-universe despite the characters pretending that they're hosting in the morning.) Co-developed by Muppet performers Kevin Clash and Bill Barretta with veteran writer Kirk Thatcher, this series is co-hosted by Clifford, Miss Piggy, and Scooter. Kermit the Frog, like in Too Late with Miss Piggy and Muppet Quiz, remains as the producer, though he also introduces each show this time.
“Good Muppet Morning! is a whole new take on the tried-and-true variety show format”, says Jim Henson, creator of the Muppets, former Disney chairman, and an executive producer and creative consultant on the new series. “Three hosts presenting brand-new sketches with Kermit continuing to provide stable leadership behind the scenes, a combination that's sure to entertain the audience”.
Each episode opens with Kermit providing teasers for some of the featured sketches and introducing Clifford, Piggy, Scooter, and the guest stars (“Yaaaaay!!!”), while the format consists of the three hosts presenting seven sketches (many of which are new sketch series to the Muppet canon, though there are returning series from earlier projects such as a reboot of Pigs in Space) as news stories, as well as interviewing guest stars (who also have their own skits).
These skits include Dr. Clifford & Dr. Fozzie (which follows the titular doctors bumbling their way through a surgery) [1], Rowlf and the News-Hounds (in which Rowlf and his old Purina Dog Chow cohort, Baskerville the Hound, along with Afghan Hound, try reporting news stories in the form of musical numbers), Feelin’ Those Fads (where sibling Muppet fans Alvin and Audrey report on the latest fads, usually fictional ones), and The WSR Crew (Whatever, Shrimp, and Rat - wait, Pepé’s not a shrimp, he's a king prawn, okay?), in which Gonzo, Rizzo, and Pepé [2] pull off some crazy stunts in a parody of r-comp shows from the 2000’s. [3]
And, of course, there's a universal rule that, if there's a Muppet TV show, Statler and Waldorf must heckle the Muppets and their guest stars, this time watching them on TV at their den like the one in the original 1975 Sex and Violence pilot. Sometimes, they'll even phone the show using a 1980’s landline (because it's an upgrade from a 1920’s candlestick phone) when Fozzie's on... just so he can hear their snarky commentary! Plus, the usual backstage segments with Kermit falling apart at the seams trying to get the Muppets under control. Will he ever learn that that's easier said than done?
+
+
Basically this, but replace Kermit and Miss Piggy with TTL’s hosts.
Like Too Late, there are some new Muppet characters as well, including Scooter’s friend Bobby (performed by Alice Dinnean), a very snarky but easygoing tomboy who not only loves skateboarding and playing sports, but is also a (not-so-secret) fan of ballet (one episode sees her dance with Benjamin Millepied) and really loves teasing the extremely feminine but un-ladylike Piggy. Also new to the Muppet canon are Clifford’s nephew Norman (performed by Clash protégé Tau Bennett and named after Clifford the Big Red Dog creator Norman Bridwell), a novice reporter who is often subject to accusations of nepotism from Piggy, Frida (Kathleen Kim [4], named after artist Frida Kahlo), a spiritual hippie artist and a high school friend of Janice’s whose eyes are hidden beneath her bangs a la Boober Waggle, and Cooperbot (Billy Barkhurst), a robot who will work for a quarter. (Literally, ‘cause he’ll only work for one minute unless you put another quarter into his coin slot).
And, like in other recent projects, some of the more obscure Muppets are getting their time to shine as well, such as the aforementioned Baskerville the Hound (Artie Esposito) and Afghan Hound (Dinnean), and Dolores [5] (Donna Kimball), the trumpet/trombone player in the Muppet Orchestra on The Muppet Show, now co-starring in her own recurring segment with the similarly obscure Mildred Huxtetter (Julianne Buescher) where the duo try to review musical performances, only for their reviews to fall apart in true Muppet fashion.
Also similar to Too Late, Good Muppet Morning! features celebrity guests that are often ostensibly there to promote something, but the interview segments get interrupted by typical Muppet antics. For example, in the very first episode, Nicholas Brendon and Amy Jo Johnson arrive to promote Resident Evil, only for the Swedish Chef to come running around trying to deal with rotten zombie-like foods. Or in subsequent episodes, Rizzo, Yolanda and other rats ravage all the foods brought in by Rachael Ray while she's promoting a cookbook, Steve Irwin treats the chaos caused by a rampaging Animal like a segment on his show, and retired NASCAR driver Kelley Earnhardt [6] challenges Bobby in a one-on-one stock car race while promoting Disney Direct’s new direct viewing series, NASCAR: Fast Women. These are just previews for what to expect, though.
As one of the three hosts would say to wrap up each show, "we hope you have a Good Muppet Morning!"
[1] Inspired by a similar sketch series on the obscure France-exclusive series Muppets TV.
[2] Inspired by a YouTube comment I read suggesting them as a trio.
[3] More on what those are later.
[4] IOTL, she performs Julia’s mother Elena and Ji-Young on Sesame Street.
[5] Better known as Trumpet Girl. IOTL, Rashida Jones coined the name Dolores on the set of The Muppets (she also performed Trumpet Girl during her cameo in the movie).
[6] Another butterfly; Kelley is the sister of Dale Earnhardt Jr. and was an aspiring race car driver before moving on to business due to a lack of opportunities, currently co-owning the JR Motorsports team in the NASCAR Xfinity Series. I’d imagine there would be more female drivers in NASCAR from the 1990s on due to the societal changes, leading to Kelley herself having a long career driving for her father's team.
EDIT: Resized the images.
EDIT 2: Added apostrophe to 2000's. Alright, should be my last edit for this post.
RETCON: I renamed Walter and Wendy to Alvin (Shockeye7665's suggestion) and Audrey, and cast Artie Esposito as Alvin. I realized that Walter's name and performer would be different due to butterflies.
Review of Pigs in Space (2007) - A Cosmic Muppet Classic!
By Rob Napier for At the Theater blog, 7-27-2007
Guest post by @Trevor807
In the latest Muppet cinematic adventure based on a series of sketches on The Muppet Show and set in the distant future of 2017, the crew of the USS Swinetrek, Captain Link Hogthrob (Steve Whitmire), First Mate Miss Piggy (Eric Jacobson), and Dr. Julius Strangepork (voice by Jerry Nelson, puppetry by Matt Vogel) fight a war against Dearth Nadir (“played” by Gonzo the Great, performed by Dave Goelz) and his army of rats.
Directed by Paul King and written by Kirk Thatcher and Joey Mazzarino (who also does some puppetry in this film) from a screenplay by Thatcher, Mazzarino, and the late Jerry Juhl (who passed away in 2005 and receives a dedication at the beginning) with Kevin Clash, Jim Henson, Jerry Nelson, and Martin Baker as executive producers, Pigs in Space is a thrilling cinematic parody of sci-fi works such as Star Wars and Star Trek, even featuring actors from both works such as Mark Hamill, Rosalind Chao, and LeVar Burton.
This but as a big-budget Hollywood movie.
Please read this section at your own risk if you haven't seen the movie. If you have, then continue reading.
The movie opens up with an announcer (Nelson) reciting the title (“PIGS….. IN….. SPACE!!!!!!!”) and introducing the Swinetrek crew, using new adjectives to describe them like how they were introduced in the second season of The Muppet Show. Then we see the crew themselves doing their morning routine, and then arriving in their respective positions. Classic Muppet antics ensue, with Link, of course, being a male chauvinist pig (literally) towards Piggy, who karate-chops him after he makes a joke at her weight. Suddenly, they get a call from S.N.O.R.T. (Spatial Nadir Opposition Revolution Team) leaders Kermit (Whitmire) and Fozzie (Jacobson), who tell them to fly back to Earth for a meeting. They're told that the mysterious Dearth Nadir and his Cosmic Rodential Army and Zonal Empire (C.R.A.Z.E.) are up to their old tricks, and that they must seek out the former soldier Ken (Mark Hamill), who was a general in the Third Pork-Rodent War many years ago.
The Swinetrek crew spends the first act seeking Ken, and meet up with Scooter (David Rudman), who gives them intel on Dearth and C.R.A.Z.E., while Statler (voice by Nelson, puppetry by Whitmire) and Waldorf (Bill Barretta) provide their usual brand of commentary throughout the picture. They also later meet Zondra (Fran Brill), who becomes the leader of the S.N.O.R.T. squadron.
Dearth, meanwhile, schemes with his second-in-commands, Grand Admirals Rizzo (Whitmire) and Pepé (Barretta), the latter only being there as a favor to the producer, at their EVIL Lair. (EVIL stands for “Evil Villain’s Immoral Lair”, so that would make it “Evil Villain’s Immoral Lair Lair”, like how DC Comics is “Detective Comics Comics”, or how the “M” in ATM machine stands for “machine”. Heck, even the redundancy of the acronym is lampshaded!) Dearth, of course, gets his ideas from doing wild stunts with cultural aspects such as reciting Shakespeare and playing classical music on his trumpet.
Finally, the party finds Ken in his hideout, where he teaches the Swinetrek crew and Scooter the ways… of yoga. And also some fighting moves.
Several rats bring in the tough and snarky Princess Rose (Rosalind Chao), daughter of an unidentified royal, for interrogation in which she would get tickled with a feather unless she squeals, but she manages to escape after a few minutes using a blaster she tricked a rat into giving him. Someone better tell C.R.A.Z.E. that they need better employees.
In the second act, the heroes stop at the planet Koozebane (a staple in the Pigs in Space sketches), where they meet up with Scooter’s friend, a bounty hunter named Peter (LeVar Burton) who agrees to help them with the fight for a price: 62 cents. The six, after checking their wallets, pay their money to Peter and he joins in. Just then, they meet Rose, and arrive back at S.N.O.R.T. to attend a briefing for the upcoming battle, with many familiar Muppets in attendance (plus a few rogue rats). Link, being Link, tries making his usual sexist remarks towards Rose, who karate-chops him to Piggy’s approval, and Zondra bonds with Rose due to both of them being tough girls.
Back at the EVIL Lair, Dearth, Rizzo, and Pepé deploy hundreds of fighter jets (all piloted by rats) above space to send a message to S.N.O.R.T., starting the climatic space battle. Notably, the C.R.A.Z.E. fleet is animated with CGI from Disney’s Digital Division, while S.N.O.R.T.’s less powerful fighters are initially live-action models. Dearth brags about his higher budget and better technology, even boasting that he gave his jets “the Special Edition treatment”, a hilarious reference to George Lucas’ Special Editions of the original Star Wars trilogy. (Incidentally, Lisa Henson, Jim’s daughter and Disney’s chairwoman, worked with Lucas on those.) As the trio scheme, Rose works her way through the EVIL Lair by distracting many rats, while Ken sacrifices himself by crashing his jet into the power source of one of C.R.A.Z.E.’s jets, causing it to blow up.
The third act stands out as the film’s finest scene, in my opinion: as Scooter checks in and relays info to the Swinetrek, S.N.O.R.T. is finally able to deploy CGI jets as well, and after Link (as usual) tries forcing Piggy to cook food for S.N.O.R.T.’s fighters in the Swinetrek’s kitchen, Piggy karate-chops him and steals a fighter jet so she could participate in the space battle. She winds up being the best of the team, even taking down Dearth’s fighter jet, along with Rizzo and Pepé’s jets. (Don't worry, they all have parachutes. And spacesuits.) More celebrities make cameo appearances fighting for both sides as "celebrity fighters", including Jude Barsi, John Cleese, Bryan Cranston, Jane Kaczmarek, Tom Kenny, Sylvester Stallone, Tim Curry, and Ashley Tisdale. Meanwhile, Rose arrives at the trio’s office, and is able to power down the EVIL Lair just by pulling a plug, with the trio realizing that they could've prevented this by simply using a more complex power source.
Dearth, Rizzo, and Pepé are arrested and placed in cages where peanuts are pelted at them (naturally, only Dearth loves it), Ken comes back alive and well (because his ship also had a parachute and a spacesuit) but leaves for another film and promises to come back another day, and the Swinetrek’s crew, along with Scooter, Zondra, Rose, and Peter, are met with a ceremony by Kermit, Fozzie and other S.N.O.R.T. members, who give Link, Piggy, Dr. Strangepork, Scooter, and Zondra medals, also revealing that Rose is the daughter of King Sam (Jacobson). In Piggy’s case, however, she is given two for being an excellent fighter, leading to Link accusing Kermit of favoritism. Kermit, however, demotes Link to First Mate for his incompetence and poor leadership, and promotes Piggy to Captain. Piggy, of course, takes the liberty of forcing Link to cook and do laundry. Harsh? Yes. Sweet revenge? Also yes. And Dr. Strangepork, of course, is careful enough not to crack jokes at Piggy’s weight or gender, lest he get karate-chopped. The movie ends with the Swinetrek crew off on another adventure.
After the credits, Statler and Waldorf provide one last crack about space, while in the middle of space and wearing spacesuits.
Thatcher and Mazzarino are both Muppet veterans, and this shows in their screenplay, which captures the good old-fashioned humor the Muppets are known for. References to science fiction and fourth wall breaks are abundant. Michael Giacchino composes the music with all the seriousness you’d expect out of, say, Star Wars, even utilizing the London Symphony Orchestra, adding another layer to the comedy. And King, the director, shows himself to be well-versed in mixing irreverence with sentimentality, as well as understanding what makes the Muppets tick.
Making this film more significant is that this is Jim Henson’s swan song as Rowlf the Dog (who made a cameo as S.N.O.R.T. squadron fighter Gray Seven), having originated the role 45 years ago and continuing to perform the character even when his duties with Disney throughout the '80s and '90s forced him to give up his other roles. Henson stated in a recent Associated Press interview that, due to his increasing age (70 as of this writing), he believed Barretta was “fully ready” to take on Rowlf full-time. Don't worry, though: he will continue to consult on Muppet projects for the foreseeable future. And said retirement even receives a cheeky wink in the film when Rowlf comments after shooting down a C.R.A.Z.E. fighter, “Whew, maybe I oughta retire when this is all over”.
In the end, I’m rating this film the full five stars. It's a solid addition to the Muppets’ filmography, and if the box office returns are good, I would expect a sequel or two to arrive in a few years’ time. After all, that's what happened with Star Wars. People loved it and we got sequels, plus prequels, plus an expanded universe, plus George Lucas making that mint off of merchandising sales because of short-sighted decisions from the now-separated 20th Century Fox. Maybe Disney could make a mint off of merchandising sales for Pigs in Space this holiday season. We’ll just have to wait and see.
Until next time, this is Rob Napier, and I’ll see you at the theater!
PIGS IN SPACE
Rating: 5/5
Directed by Paul King
Rated PG
Runtime: 102 minutes
Cast:
Steve Whitmire as Captain Link Hogthrob, Kermit the Frog, Grand Admiral Rizzo, Statler (puppetry), the Newsman, Beaker, Lips, and Other Muppets
Eric Jacobson as First Mate Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Animal, Marvin Suggs, King Sam, and Other Muppets
Jerry Nelson as Dr. Julius Strangepork, Statler, Sgt. Floyd Pepper, Robin the Frog, Lew Zealand, and Announcer (voice)
Dave Goelz as Dearth Nadir (Gonzo), Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Zoot, Beauregard, and Other Muppets
Bill Barretta as Grand Admiral Pepé, Waldorf, Dr. Teeth, the Swedish Chef, Sal Minella, Bobo the Bear, and Other Muppets
David Rudman as Scooter, Janice, and Other Muppets
Fran Brill as Zondra and Other Muppets
Mark Hamill as Ken
Rosalind Chao as Princess Rose
LeVar Burton as Steve
Kevin Clash as Clifford and Other Muppets
Matt Vogel as Dr. Julius Strangepork, Sgt. Floyd Pepper, Lew Zealand, Robin the Frog (puppetry), Sweetums, and Other Muppets
Peter Linz as Dr. Phil Van Neuter and Other Muppets
Jim Henson as Rowlf the Dog
Additional Performers: Dave Barclay, Jennifer Barnhart, Rickey Boyd, Wayne Brady, Warrick Brownlow-Pike, Julianne Buescher, Tyler Bunch, Leslie Carrara-Rudolph, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Alice Dinnean, Artie Esposito, Dan Garza, Louise Gold, Geoff Felix, Andy Heath, John Kennedy, Donna Kimball, Drew Massey, Joey Mazzarino, Kathryn Mullen, Brett O’Quinn, Nigel Plaskitt, Karen Prell, Mike Quinn, Martin P. Robinson, John Tartaglia, and Victor Yerrid
Waggle Rock: Welcome to the Rock! (2003)
Post from the Puppets Galore! Netsite by F. R. Argyle, April 3rd, 2013
Hi guys! Today is the start of Waggle Wednesday, with an new article posted every Wednesday of this April, to celebrate the 30th anniversary of Waggle Rock!
And what a way to start off this commemoration, with the first feature-length movie of the franchise, after the many short films that had appeared before many Disney films from 1987 to 2002.
Waggle Rock: Welcome to the Rock! was released in theatres on April 18th, 2003 by Walt Disney Pictures, on the 20th anniversary of Waggle Rock’s first ever episode on the launch of the Disney Channel, and was directed by the late Jerry Nelson in his first feature-length movie directorial debut, having had directed the 2002 Waggle Rock: Gozer Power short film[1].
He took the directing job, because Nelson felt his experience with the original show meant he was uniquely qualified to direct a Waggle Rock movie (while Karen Prell, who directed multiple TV episodes with the Muppets, could have directed, an later interview stated that she felt she was not ready for a director’s role of a feature-length film yet, and did realise that Jerry was passionate about his wish to direct the movie, so she remained as a producer alongside Kathryn, Steve, Dave, Jane Henson and Jerry Juhl, who wrote the film). This would lead to Jerry directing The Muppets Return, and it’s short film, The O.D.D. in 2005 (even though at that point, he had stepped down from puppeteering and was sticking strictly to voicing his characters), which is a story for another time[2].
And Jerry also directed the infamous Muppets in Space! short that appeared before the film, famous for simply three words: Muppets in zero-g! But again, that’s a story for another day[3].
Jim Henson served as executive producer and consultant, while performing Shantus the Storyteller as well as Chairgozer Nyloc (Filling in for the series’ Chairgozer Dross, and a Gozer who has the most fabulous beard!) in very brief, but memorable appearances.
So, dance your cares away as we get right into the movie!
The film starts off with the Richards family, comprised of daughter Carol (played by Evan Rachael Wood), sons Joe (played by Haley Joe Osment) and Jack (played by Daryl Sabara), their mother Jean (played by Jodie Foster) and their new stepfather George Stevenson (played by Mark Harmon), visiting the home of Doctor Donald Richards, Jean’s father, at his seaside home, near an automated lighthouse[4] on Hunt Peak (which, along with the name of Richards, is a tribute to deceased Muppet performer Richard Hunt) for spring break.
“Doc Don”[5], played by the late David Ogden Stiers, essentially fulfils the role of Gerry Parkes’ eccentric tinkerer and inventor from the original show, “Dan”, with his ever-faithful dog, Sprocket, by his side.
Meanwhile, after reading the post-card from his Uncle Traveling Matt, who as usual, has gotten himself in a spot of bother on a golf course (believing that the holes are Waggle holes that have shrunk, somehow), Gobo starts writing in his diary (which he plans to recite to his uncle when he returns) about the state of Waggle Rock, which basically gets new audiences all caught up on how things stand at this moment or fans of Waggle Rock who need to remind themselves of certain events that happened (namely Gobo’s trips into outer space and what he’s observed while avoiding Sprocket, Red’s friendship with Cotterpin Gozer, Mokey getting new friends for her plant Lanford, Wembley seeking advice from the Trash Heap about the boredom he’s feeling and his inability to think of new songs lately, and Boober, well, still doing laundry and cooking).
But with the Richards family moving in, Gobo has a few encounters with Carol, Joe and Jack, and thus, a friendship starts forming as Gobo starts coming up for more visits (out of sight of the parents, of course). And also, not all is well within the Richards family, as Carol, Joe and Jack are dealing with the recent loss of their father and still coming to terms with that, along with their mother’s marriage to George. And soon, the Richards’ story-arc within the film is to come to terms with “the new normal”.
However, trouble arises on the horizon, with businessman Eric Corpman (played by Phil Hartman, who clearly is having a blast in the role) is doing his utmost to force Doc and his neighbours to leave, in order to take over the land and build an elaborate mansion (as his other one, inherited from his family, is crumbling apart and he really does not want to spend money to renovate it). But Doc and his few remaining neighbours, all refuse to leave, and Corpman, being the stereotypical evil businessman that he is, plans on flooding them from the ground and ruin their houses, basically.
Problem is, in order to flood Doc’s home, Corpman is pumping water into Waggle Rock![6] And thus, everywhere gets flooded, the Great Hall, the Gozerdome and even the Krog’s Garden.
With this emergency, the Waggle Five, Cotterpin Gozer and Junior Krog, after awkwardly getting together and learning of each other’s predicament, all head to the Trash Heap, who advises them to act fast and travel into Outer Space to prevent Waggle Rock from being flooded completely.
So, with Marjory working her magic to bring Waggle Five, Cotterpin and Junior together with Carol, Joe and Jack, out in Outer Space, the race is on for our unlikely team to stop Corpman’s dastardly plot, all culminating with our heroes sneaking into Corpman’s power plant to shut down the pumps as well as prevent Corpman from adding toxic waste into the water (after he discovers the existence of Waggle Rock, and spitefully seeks to go further to get his mansion, by killing all the greenery and make everyone ill), with Uncle Traveling Matt coming in on a hot-air balloon for some timely assistance[7]!
In the aftermath, Corpman is arrested by the authorities after his scheme is stopped dead in it's tracks, and our heroes return to Waggle Rock (with the Waggles all singing “Hip Hip Hooray”, of course), with the Richards family also concluding their story-arcs.
Months later, Gobo and the Waggles receive a postcard from Carol, Joe and Jack, who tell them about how their lives are going, in addition to leaving them a gift in the form of an MP3 player (with instructions) that includes a playlist of songs, to which the Waggles press the play button, before the end credits start and we’re treated with an David Bowie cover version of the Waggle Rock theme song.
And at the end, Marjory appears to essentially break the fourth wall, advising that the movie’s over, and it’s time to go home, with Philo and Gunge adding the customary "The Trash Heap has Spoken!".
Overall, the film plays out just like an extended episode of Waggle Rock (with a much bigger budget, improved sets and effects, mind you), with the awesome songs that you’d expect (both old familiar ones from the show and some very good new ones) and very heartwarming moments throughout. Sure, it’s not going to be winning any Oscars, but it’s a feel-good film that makes you feel happy and warm, puts a smile on your face and proves that the Waggles certainly have not lost the magic, for as a wise Trash Heap once said, “You cannot leave the magic!”.
Stay tuned, for the next Waggle Wednesdays will cover the 2006 Waggle Rock video game and the two Waggle Rock short films (2009’s Waggle Rock: Mokey’s Tree Day and 2010’s Waggle Rock: Boober in Outer Space) before finishing with the 2012 sequel, Down in Waggle Rock, directed by Karen Prell.
Muppet Performers[8]:
Jim Henson as Shantus the Storyteller and Chairgozer Nyloc.
Jerry Nelson as Gobo Waggle, Marjory the Trash Heap, Architect Gozer, Lugnut Gozer, Pa Krog (face/voice).
Steve Whitmire as Wembley Waggle, Flange Gozer, Sprocket.
Dave Goelz as Boober Waggle, Uncle Traveling Matt, Large Marvin Waggle, the Oldest Waggle of the Rock, Wrench Gozer, Philo.
Kathryn Mullen as Mokey Waggle, Cotterpin Gozer, Ma Krog (face/voice).
Karen Prell as Red Waggle, Modem Gozer, Wingnut Gozer, Fluffinella.
Kevin Clash as Junior Krog (face/voice), T-Nut Gozer and background Waggles.
John Tartaglia as Sprocket (right hand performer), Gunge and background Waggles.
Matt Vogel as Gobo Waggle (right hand performer) and background Waggles.
Alice Dinnean as Ma Krog (body) and background Waggles.
Martin P. Robinson as Pa Krog (body) and background Waggles.
Rob Mills as Junior Krog (body), Lanford and background Waggles.
Cast:
David Ogden Stiers as Doctor Donald “Don” Richards.
Jodie Foster as Jean Stevenson.
Mark Harmon as George Stevenson.
Evan Rachael Wood as Carol Richards.
Haley Joel Osment as Joe Richards.
Daryl Sabara as Jack Richards.
Phil Hartman as Eric Corpman.
Jerry Nelson as golfer (cameo)
Steve Whitmire as Ned Shimmelfinney (cameo)
Dave Goelz as Hot-air balloon man (cameo)
Kevin Clash as Corpman security guard (cameo)
Kathryn Mullen as Doc’s neighbour 1 (cameo)
Karen Prell as Doc’s neighbour 2 (cameo)
[1] A short film that details new recruit Lugnut Gozer (performed by Jerry Nelson), who after a really bad day on the work crew, is motivated by Cotterpin Gozer and her friends with a singalong, which appears before 2002’s At the End of the World.
[2] Guest post coming soon! Oh and The O.D.D. is a reference to the the O.M.D., featuring various Disney and Muppet dogs, of course.
[3] The Muppets in Space! short basically have the Muppets launching off into space and getting into their usual antics on an space station. Behind the scenes, the Muppet performers go to the USR, or more specifically, the Yuri Gagarin Cosmonaut Training Center at Star City in Moscow, to film the short’s zero-g performances on a set built in the cargo hold onboard an Ilyushin Il-76MDK “vomit comet”, basically similar to how 1995’s Apollo 13 filmed on board a NASA KC-135 reduced gravity aircraft for the weightlessness sequences.
[4] The lighthouse being a nod to OTL’s Fraggle Rock’s UK version, which had the Fraggle Rock lighthouse (filmed at St. Anthony’s Lighthouse near Falmouth, Cornwall), lived in by Sprocket and Fulton Mackay’s the Captain as the human host (before Mackay’s death lead to his replacement by firstly, John Gordon Sinclair’s P.K, then Simon O’Brien’s B.J).
[5] The “Don” being a tribute to Don Sahlin.
[6] Elements of this plot are similar to the OTL Fraggle Rock season 5 episode “The River of Life”.
[7] In OTL, a Fraggle Rock spinoff consisted of Traveling Matt along with two new Fraggles (along with Doozers in new vehicles) exploring the world in a hot air balloon was being explored and considered.
[8] As Waggle Rock in this timeline was made at Disney, rather than OTL’s Fraggle Rock being a international co-production between the US, UK and Canada (where a lot of Fraggle Rock’s puppeteers were based), I had to change around the performers for the Krogs to fit with this timeline, so basically, Kathryn Mullen does the face and voice of Ma Krog in TTL rather than Myra Fried or Cheryl Wagner, while Martin P. Robinson does the body of Pa Krog rather than Gord Robertson. As compensation for this, I did keep Gerry Parkes and Rob Mills around and Trish Leeper still performs as the body of Ma Krog in the TTL series.
A Touch of Magic (2001)
Post from From the Paper to the Pictures Net-log, by Quill S. Creen on January 1st, 2021. And welcome once again to From the Paper to the Pictures, where we discuss adaptations of books into film, tv shows and video games!
And we return from our Christmas hiatus, after our post of Isaac Asimov's Foundation two weeks ago, to give every single one of you a special gift for New Year's Day!
Starting from today, we now cover the infamous Harry Fletcher films, released by Penguin Pictures that firmly established the new film studios as a viable European competitor to many of the American studios, that still grows strong to this day.
Development:
With the inevitable success of the Harry Fletcher books by Jo Rowling, it was going to be inevitable that they were heading for the big screen.
While the story of how the books got to the big screen is really incredible, there’s not enough room for that on here, but long story short, after a Disney publisher examined the book (which was known under the draft name of The Philosopher’s Stone), really liked it and expressed strong interest in acquiring the whole rights, discussions were good, but Rowling politely declined, for she “wanted a British publisher”. Understanding this, the Disney publisher put in a good word for Rowling with Penguin Books (but Rowling, in gratitude for this, did allow for Disney’s Fantasia Books to acquire the US rights) and from then on, Rowling got a publisher for A Touch of Magic: A Harry Fletcher Story, which was first published on July 31st, 1997 in the UK[1].
Then, one copy in late 1997 ended up in the hands of film producer David Heyman, who was really impressed with Rowling’s writing, and saw the opportunity for his then-fledging film production company, Cherub Pictures[2], a position that became reinforced after the releases of the second and third books.
In 1999, discussions with Heyman (bolstered by the 1999 adaptation of Diana Wynn Jones’ The Ogre Downstairs[3]) lead to Rowling making a deal for the film rights to her books.
With the publishing rights of the books under Penguin Books (via their Puffin label), it was only natural that the wider Penguin Entertainment Group, would acquire the film, TV and theme park rights[4] for a sum of a reported £1 million.
Part of the deal was that Rowling insisted that the cast of the films remained British and Irish, that foreign actors were not to be cast unless the characters were specified as such, and prominently, the rights of the characters themselves still remained fully with Rowling (thus, preventing any non-author-written works or Penguin producing any films not based on books she authored), as well as retaining the right for final script approval and control over merchandising.
Discussions began for the search for a director, with names such as Chris Columbus, Terry Gilliam, Frank Oz, Ron Howard, Jonathan Demme, Mike Newell, Alan Parker, Wolfgang Petersen, Rob Reiner, Ivan Reitman, Tim Robbins, Brad Silberling, M. Night Shyamalan and Peter Weir being considered[5].
Although a fan of the books, Columbus had to regretfully decline as he was working on another Penguin Pictures film, the adaptation of Roald Dahl’s Matilda[6], while Ron Howard was busy with Revenge of the Sith, and Oz was directing the adaptation of Stephen King’s The Eyes of the Dragon for MGM.
The choice came down to Gilliam, Newell and Parker.
Gilliam took himself out of the running for he was at that stage of taking a break from big-budget films after having directed Watchmen in 1998, before Alan Parker, director of Bugsy Malone, Midnight Express, Fame, Pink Floyd - The Wall, Birdy, Come See the Paradise and The Commitments, was chosen to direct A Touch of Magic.
Steve Kloves was chosen to write the screenplay.
Often having received synopses of books proposed as film adaptations which he never read, Harry Fletcher caught his attention and became an fan of the series after buying the first book. In his meetings with Penguin Pictures, he was strongly insisting that the film had to be British and stayed true to the characters.
Even though Kloves was nervous with his first meeting with Rowling, things went well after revealing that Hippolyta was his favourite character.
Rowling still remained involved with a large amount of creative control (in which she had a line include in the script removed after revealing that it would directly contradict an event in Order of the Phoenix: A Harry Fletcher Story, which was then unreleased at that point), to such an extent that she was given a producer’s credit[7].
Casting:
The search for the lead roles of Harry, Ron and Hippolyta began via an open casting call.
Around a total of 1,000 were considered for Harry Fletcher, while around 900 were considered for Hippolyta.
Then the decisions were made:
10-year old Eric Tate-Tyler[8], who had only been acting in school plays before acting in advertisements, was spotted by Rowling on television and the casting director asked for him to audition, to which he was cast as Harry Fletcher in 2000.
Out of around 100 candidates for Ron Hedgeley, Thomas Brodie-Sangster[9] (who would also get his first acting roles in two TV films in 2001) was the favourite, between him and William Moseley[10], who would end up starring as Randolph Faulkner in Order of the Phoenix.
The role of Hippolyta Granger was given to Rebecca A. Morrison[8], an 11-year old child actress from Birmingham, who only appeared as an extra the year before and was just getting into supporting roles on TV, before, according to her own words, going to the audition “on a lark, never hoping I would get the role” and impressing everyone, including Rowling, in spite of some executives raising concerns over her slight Birmingham accent.
Rupert Grint, who had auditioned to play Harry Fletcher, instead got the role of Nevil Potter, Tom Felton, who had auditioned for Ron Hedgeley[11], was cast as Draco Malfeus, while Anna Popplewell was cast as Scorpia Spinx.
Harry Melling and Joshua Herdman were considered for Jared Parkinson, but lost out to Vincent D. Floyd[8], instead taking the roles of Gregory Crabbe and Herbert Goyle, while Meredith Lloyd-Owens[8], who was considered for Lavender Parkinson, was cast as Pansy Goyle.
Other students cast were Devon Murray as Shane Finnigan[12], Alfie Enoch as Gary Samuels[13], Francis J. O’Connell[8] as Bill Hedgeley, Raleigh Corrie[8] as Percy Hedgeley and twins Kieran and Morgan Tilly[8] as the twin tricksters Tom and John Puckle.
Juno Temple[14], a budding child actress at this point, got the role of Ginny Hedgeley, a clearly important role for later (especially in the 2nd novel) but for now, she merely appeared with the rest of the Hedgeleys at King’s Cross.
Even though Richard Harris was asked to take the role of Alban Dumbledore, prior commitments with The Lord of the Rings films, in which he played Gandalf, prevented him from taking the role, and thus, after Peter O'Toole, Sean Connery and Patrick McGoohan passed on the role[15], Scottish actor Ian Richardson of House of Cards fame, was cast as the headmaster.
Rowling’s favourites, Maggie Smith, Alan Rickman, Miriam Margolyes and Robbie Coltrane were cast as Professors Aife Minerva, Severus Snape, Pomona Sprout and groundskeeper Rubeus Hagrid[16].
Tim Roth had auditioned for Leonidas Scrimwick while David Thewlis auditioned for Quirus Quirrel, but lost out to Liam Neeson and Ian Hart. However, both of them would later be cast as Alectos Fenrik and Romulus Lupin in The Prisoners of Azkaban[17].
Mike Edmonds portrayed the Gringotts goblin, Griphook, whilst the other Goblins were portrayed by the likes of Warwick Davis, Jimmy Vee, Deep Roy, Kiran Shah, Kenny Baker and Malcolm Dixon[18], and Michael Kilgarrif voiced Bower the Centaur.
As for the ghosts (and one poltergeist), John Cleese was cast as Nearly-Headless Nick, Rowan Atkinson as the Bloody Lord, Emily Mortimer as the Grey Lady and Mark Addy as the Fat Friar, while Tony Robinson was cast as Professor Binns and Rik Mayall portrayed Peeves[19].
And even Rowling was given a cameo, appearing as the “helpful muggle” who points Harry in the direction of Platforms 9 and 10 at King’s Cross, telling him “good luck” while giving him a smile[20].
Cast List:
Eric Tate-Tyler as Harry Fletcher.
Thomas Brodie-Sangster as Ron Hedgeley.
Rebecca A. Morrison as Hippolyta Granger.
Tom Felton as Draco Malfeus.
Anna Popplewell as Scorpia Spinx.
Rupert Grint as Nevil Potter.
Robbie Coltrane as Rubeus Hagrid.
Ian Richardson as Albus Dumbledore.
Alan Rickman as Severus Snape.
Maggie Smith as Aife Minerva.
Liam Neeson as Leonidas Scrimwick.
Miriam Margolyes as Pomona Sprout.
Terry Jones as Mylor Silvanus.
Tony Robinson as Cuthbert Binns.
Zoë Wanamaker as Rolanda Hoch
David Bradley as Argus Filch.
Ian Hart as Quirus Quirrel.
John Cleese as Nearly Headless Nick.
Rowan Atkinson as the Bloody Lord.
Emily Mortimer as the Grey Lady.
Mark Addy as the Fat Friar.
Rik Mayall as Peeves.
Jennifer Saunders as The Fat Lady.
Danielle Taylor[21] as Olivia Wood.
Siobhan Allpress[8] as Catrìona Peregrine.
Georgina Leonidas as Hannah Spinnet.
Kieran and Morgan Tilly as Tom and John Puckle.
Luke Youngblood as Jordan Lee.
Harry Melling[22] as Gregory Crabbe.
Joshua Herdman as Herbert Goyle.
Meredith Lloyd-Owens as Pansy Goyle.
Henry Quilley[8] as Dickon Flint.
Devon Murray as Shane Finnigan.
Alfie Enoch as Gary Samuels.
Julie Walters as Molly Hedgeley.
Francis J. O’Connell as Bill Hedgeley.
Raleigh Corrie as Percy Hedgeley.
Juno Temple as Ginny Hedgeley
Roger Ashton-Griffiths as Vernon Parkinson.
Fiona Shaw as Petunia Parkinson.
Vincent D. Floyd as Jared Parkinson.
Holliday Grainger as Lavender Parkinson.
Alison Doody as Bridget Teller.
John Hurt as Mr. Ollivander.
Mike Edmonds as Griphook.
Michael Kilgarrif as Bower (voice).
Jo Rowling as Helpful Muggle (cameo).
Filming:
Filming proved quite a challenge, when executives pleaded with the filmmakers to make various changes to make it “less British” and "more marketable".
Rowling, Kloves and Parker fought their ground over the executives’ insistence to replace Ron or Hippolyta with an American character, make Harry to be more of “a wisecracker”, as well as combining the set pieces from various books into one movie rather than adapt each book individually, and even more so, change the names of the houses to “something children can actually pronounce”[23].
But there was one battle that Rowling had lost: in that a song written for the film would play. Rowling disliked the whole idea, insisting that no commercial songs of any type should be used in the films, but had to relent, after making the executives insist that they appear only during the end credits[24].
Nonetheless, filming began on 29th September 2000, at Pinewood Studios[25], which Penguin Entertainment Group owned.
Initial discussion over the Hogwarts Express came down to choosing the locomotive for the film, of which were there around four candidates:
The Southern Railway (SR) West Country class 21C127 Taw Valley (which had already been given a maroon paint make-over with Hogwarts Express nameplates added to promote the release of The Dark Mark: A Harry Fletcher Story in 2000[26]).
The Great Western Railway (GWR) 4900 Class 5972 Olton Hall.
The London, Midland and Scottish Railway (LMS) Stanier Class 5 4-6-0 No. 45212.
The GWR 4073 Class 5051 Drysllwyn Castle.
The locomotive selection came down to a close contest between Olton Hall and No. 45212, before LMS 45212 was chosen, given a crimson makeover, added the “Hogwarts Express” on it’s headboard and nameplates while still keeping it’s number. The carriages chosen, were five British Rail Mark I carriages decorated in maroon, green, blue and cream (as per the book descriptions of the carriages being decorated in the colours of Hogwarts).
Filming did take place at King’s Cross Station, albeit at Platforms 4 and 5 instead of the real Platforms 9 and 10 due to being in a separate building from the main station, while due to temporary buildings obscuring the façade of the real King's Cross station, St Pancras railway station was used for the exterior shots.
Goathland railway station, on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway, and both Haworth and Oxenhope railway stations on the Keighley and Worth Valley Railway were used for filming the Hogwarts Express in motion and stopping and departing from Hogsbury[27] station, while London Zoo was the location for the scene of where Harry releases a snake.
Opportunities to film at Canterbury Cathedral for shots at Hogwarts were scampered after Canterbury rejected offers to have filming of Hogwarts take place there, thus an amalgamation of shots were filmed at Gloucester Cathedral, Durham Cathedral, Alnwick Castle, and the Universities of Oxford and Cambridge, as well as Loch Duich (for the Hogwarts lake), Burnham Beeches and Black Park (for the Dark Forest)[28].
Over at Pinewood’s sound stages (including the Albert R. Broccoli 007 Stage), sets were built by production designer Stuart Craig and set designer Stephenie McMillan, of the Hogwarts Great Hall, Diagon Alley, Gringotts, the Gryffynhart common room and dormitories, and Privet Road (where it turned out to be much cheaper to film rather than use a real street[29]) as well as the double-deck interiors of the Hogwarts Express.
Filming was concluded on 5th July 2001.
Design and Special Effects:
The London Creatureworks provided the creature effects as did Thunderbird Studios, whilst Thunderbird Studios’ own digital division, Thunderbird Digital, provided digital effects alongside Framestore, animating the ghosts, poltergeists and portraits with digital puppetry.
Fluffy's three heads were created with animatronics for close-up shots, whilst the rest of his body and his heads in distance shots were animated with CGI, with the mountain troll created by visual motion capture.
Norbert, hatching from his egg, was created as an animatronic, as was the Devil's Snare (with the majority augmented with CGI) and the giant Chessboard pieces.
An 1:24 scale model of Hogwarts was built by a team of around 86 artists and crewmembers for exterior shots, with models of Gloucester Cathedral, Durham Cathedral, Alnwick Castle, Oxford and Cambridge University built to ensure more integration between the model and on location shots, while for the nighttime boat crossing of the lake, a matte painting was used.
Music:
James Horner was offered the chance to do the score, but declined the offer[30]. John Williams was asked, but he was busy with Revenge of the Sith, so Trevor Jones was chosen upon Rowling’s recommendation[31].
British singer Ellen B. Sanderson[8] sang the end-credits song, “Let the Magic Shine”[32].
Differences from the book:
Okay, so I'm not going to analyse every scene by scene and note every differences from the chapters of the book, but I'll go through the broad strokes of it all by giving you a sort of synopsis of the books, while detailing a few changes in the film afterwards.
A Touch of Magic: A Harry Fletcher Story (released in 1997).
In the prologue chapter, Vernon Parkinson and his wife Petunia, of 4 Privet Road (in Whinging in Surrey), are quite proud to be “perfectly normal” (or at least, their own kind of normal).
On the beginning of the week, an Monday, on the 1st of November, the day begins with Vernon getting dressed for work at his drill-making firm of Grunnings, gossiping about their neighbours with Petunia, who is not only expecting their second child but raising their one-year old son Jared before noticing a cat lurking around in their garden.
While Petunia tries shooing it away, Vernon heads off to work, where he notices a large amount of people in odd cloaks in a joyous mood, celebrating “the defeat of He Who Shall Not Be Named” and toasting to “Harry Fletcher - The Boy Who Lived”.
Vernon is concerned as the Fletchers are his in-laws, via Petunia’s estranged sister, and he worries about other people finding out about them and their “abnormality”.
Returning home, the afternoon news is full of stories of unexplained owl behaviour, shooting star and firework displays and other various strange activities. Vernon asks Petunia if she has heard from her sister recently, only for her to tell him no, and answers that their nephew is named “Harry”, which worries Vernon completely. The cat appears again, and Vernon chases it off.
Later that night, when everyone has gone to bed, Alban Dumbledore arrives at Privet Road and uses a device to snuff out the street lights, before greeting a cat (the same one lurking around the Parkinsons) that transforms into a human woman named “Aife Minerva”.
They both discuss the latest events, in which Lord Voldemort, the Dark Lord known as “You-Know-Who” or “He Who Shall Not Be Named”, has killed George and Lily Fletcher, and tried to kill their infant son Harry. Somehow, Harry has survived the attack and Voldemort has seemingly died (although Dumbledore is doubtful of this).
Soon, Rubeus Hagrid arrives on a flying motorcycle (given to him by Sirius Black), transporting Harry and handing him to Dumbledore.
Despite Minevra’s pleas for Dumbledore not to leave him with his only living relatives, given their behaviour, Dumbledore is adamant, and leaves Harry on the doorstep of 4 Privet Road, Whinging in Surrey, with a letter to the Parkinsons, before restoring the street lights and vanishing.
Ten years later, after the Parkinsons find Harry on their doorstep, Harry Fletcher lives in a Cupboard under the Stairs at 4 Privet Road in a miserable, friendless life with his uncle, aunt and his two cousins, Jared and Lavender[33], thinking that his parents abandoned him just after being born, and that his scar is a birthmark.
Jared and Lavender are spoiled, rotten children whose favourite pastime is to torment Harry.
After an incident on Jared’s 11th birthday, where Harry talks to a snake at the zoo and makes the glass vanish, causing Jared to fall into the enclosure (for which Harry is locked away in the cupboard with no meals for a week), a letter arrives for Harry (something he regards as odd as Harry has never had a letter, for he has had no friends). It is decorated in Red, Green, Blue and Yellow and the address is written in Silver, with a wax seal on the back, with an Lion, an Snake, an Owl and an Bear surrounding an H.
However, when Jared steals it and gives it to Vernon, Harry notices that both his aunt and uncle grow increasingly concerned, and order Jared, Lavender and Harry out of the room immediately, even going so far as to snap at Jared angrily when he protests.
Later, the letter is burned and Vernon has Harry given Jared’s “second bedroom”, but the letter addressed to Harry still arrives the next morning, this time knowing that he resides in “The Smallest Bedroom”.
Harry attempts to get the letter, only for Vernon to rip it apart.
Determined to see what his letter says, Harry tries to get to read them as they continue to arrive, even after Vernon nails the letterbox shut.
After one day results in a storm of letters flying through the chimney, Vernon get so determined that he furiously has his family leave the house and travel to a hotel on the outskirts of Cokeford, only for the letters to arrive there as well, prompting Vernon to travel to a disused home on a rock in the sea, in the midst of a storm, where he believes no letters will reach them.
Harry, unable to sleep due to the storm, starts counting down the minutes on the clock till October 31st, his eleventh birthday.
Then, when the next day begins, someone knocks on the door loudly, and then a giant knocks the door off it’s hinges, despite Vernon angrily pointing a rifle at him and shouting at him to begone, only for the giant to grab the rifle and destroy it before throwing it away, then picking Vernon up and throwing him across the room into an empty couch.
Soon, the giant greets Harry, presents Harry with a birthday cake and delivers the letter to Harry, before introducing himself as Rubeus Hagrid, the Keeper of the Keys and Grounds of Hogwarts.
Hagrid is shocked when Harry, who is clueless at what he’s saying, asks what is Hogwarts, and gets angry at the Parkinsons for not telling Harry anything about the world he came from, only for Vernon to reveal that it was “for his own good”, and that they had tried to “stamp out that abnormality” ever since they took him in, with Petunia inadvertently revealing the lies they told about his parents were not true. Hagrid is outraged at the very suggestion that George and Lily Fletcher did not love their boy, and reveals that the “birthmark” is an actual scar inflicted on the night his parents’ died, from the spell used to kill his parents, which somehow backfired on the man who killed Harry’s parents, a Dark Wizard known as Lord Voldemort (or “He Who Shall Not Be Named”).
Soon, Harry finally reads the letter, learning that he has been accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and that the term starts on the 1st of September.
Vernon insists that whatever Hagrid is spewing is a load of nonsense, and that Harry will not “be going to that crackpot school”, for he’s to go to somewhere more distinguished: Stonewall High, before making the mistake of insulting Dumbledore, only for Hagrid to threaten him. When Jared tries to steal Harry’s birthday cake (despite having been warned by Vernon not to eat it previously), Hagrid points his umbrella in his direction and makes him sprout a pig’s tail, making Petunia and Lavender scream.
When Vernon angrily attempts to attack Hagrid, he swishes his umbrella at them and puts the Parkinsons to sleep (“ruddy good riddance”).
In the morning, Harry goes with Hagrid to what seems like an ordinary alleyway in the middle of London at first, but after tapping an upside-down archway behind a pub, reveals “Diagon Alley”, part of a hidden Wizarding community in London, where they both go to Gringotts Wizarding Bank, run by Goblins, to get money for Harry to buy school supplies (from, as well as collecting an important item that Dumbledore wanted Hagrid to retrieve.
After getting a wand from Ollivander’s (that curiously is said to be “the brother of the one that gave [Harry] that scar”) and a snowy owl by the name of Hedwig, Harry and Hagrid get a drink at the Leaky Cauldron, where Harry is made aware of how famous he is in the wizarding world, meeting many people including Doris Crockford, Mr and Mrs Diggle, the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor Quirus Quirrel and Daily Prophet reporter Bridget Teller[34], before returning to Whinging, with Hagrid giving Harry a ticket to access Platform 9/7[35] at King’s Cross station.
On the 1st of September, Harry is dropped off at the station by the Parkinsons and is at a loss at how to get to the Platform by around 11 AM, until he notices the Hedgeley family using the word “Muggle”. Following them, Harry manages to get onto the platform, located at a particular spot between Platforms Nine and Ten, and is amazed to find the Hogwarts Express, a large, red steam train pulling ten passenger carriages (which appear to be bigger inside than outside, containing stairs to an upper floor that have windows in the roof)[36].
After Bill and Percy Hedgeley help Harry lift his trunk into the train, he soon looks for a compartment to enter when he comes across Hippolyta Granger, Ron Hedgeley and Scorpia Spinx. Scorpia exits the compartment after a short introduction (aiming to cause some mischief), leaving Ron and Hippolyta before Nevil Potter comes around to ask if anyone has seen his pet cat Terence. Hippolyta goes to find him while exploring a bit more of the train, leaving Harry and Ron to discuss their anxieties about Hogwarts as well as Ron to introduce Harry to elements of the wizarding world like Quaddach, confectionary like Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans, Gum Rats, Sugar Quills, Liquorice Wands, Chocolate Bird Cards (Harry’s card bearing the picture of Alban Dumbledore), Fudge Frogs, Toffee Toads and Caramel Cauldrons, as well as the wizarding newspaper, the Daily Prophet, which Harry notes a brief article noting a break-in in Gringotts.
Hippolyta comes back, just as word spreads about Harry Fletcher’s presence on the train, and numerous students come to see for themselves, including Draco Malfeus (whom Harry had briefly met in Diagon Alley), who arrogantly tries to form a friendship with Harry by “figuring out the right sort”, only to be rejected due to his arrogant manner. This almost leads to a fight until the Hogwarts Express arrives at a station, where Hagrid escorts the first-years into boats across a lake towards Hogwarts, a large castle on a lone island in the middle of it.
The boats enter through a tunnel leading into a boathouse, where they are greeted by Professor Aife Minerva and taken to the Great Hall to be sorted into their houses: Gryffynhart, Slythryus, Corvidious and Burleighnohn, explaining that each house has it’s own team for the school’s Inter-House Quaddach Cup and are in a yearlong competition with one another to acquire the most points, which are earned by success in Quaddach as well as given by teachers for academic achievement and lost for student infractions, in order to win the House Cup awarded at the end of the year.
During the sorting ceremony, Harry Fletcher goes to put on the Sorting Hat, which leads to time freezing while the hat discusses his attributes. The Sorting Hat finds it difficult to place Harry, but eventually places Harry (who is quietly saying to himself “Not Slythryus”) into Gryffynhart. Later, Hippolyta Granger is sorted into Corvidious, while Ron Hedgeley is sorted into Burleighnohn (somewhat to Harry’s disappointment and the shock of his brothers), and both Draco Malfeus and Scorpia Spinx are sorted into Slythryus.
After Dumbledore’s speech (where he warns that venturing into the Dark Forest is strictly forbidden, no magic is to be performed in between classes and that “Door 13151820[37] is out of bounds to anyone who does not wish to die a painful death”), the grand feast begins the year, where Harry is in awe at the amount of food as well as the ghosts, before being introduced to his fellow Gryffynharts such as Nevil Potter, Bill[38] and Percy Hedgeley, and twins Tom and John Puckle[39], known as Tom-John. Glancing around the room, Harry takes a look at the teachers talking to one another, only for one of them, whilst speaking with Professor Quirus Quirrel, the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher who Harry had briefly met at the Leaky Cauldron, to stare at Harry with malevolence, when suddenly, Harry feels an brief but sharp pain in his scar. Learning that the teacher in question is Professor Severus Snape, who teaches Potions and is head of Slythryus House, Harry is also made aware of certain other teachers, namely that Professor Aife Minerva is the head of Corvidious house, the head of Burleighnohn Professor Pomona Sprout and the head of Gryffynhart Professor Leonidas Scrimwick[40], as well as an older man bearing a strong resemblance to Draco talking to him, who is confirmed to be Janus Malfeus, part of the Board of Governors of Hogwarts[41], and learning that Gryffynhart are the House Cup champions for 8 of the last 10 years, with many in the other houses groaning at the thought of them getting 9.
After the feast ends, the students head to their residences, in which Harry and the rest of Gryffynhart is led to Gryffynhart Keep[42].
The next morning, they are told by Professor Scrimwick of the Hogwarts tradition of the Study Group, in which four students, one from each house, are assigned into a single study group to perform their lessons. Lead to a room, the Sorting Hat lists out the four individuals into each study group.
Harry is then placed alongside Hippolyta and Ron, only to be shocked and dismayed when Draco Malfeus is placed alongside him.
Throughout his first day, Harry navigates his new school and classes, namely History of Magic taught by the ghost Professor Binns, Transfigurations taught by Professor Minerva, Charms taught by Professor Scrimwick, Defence Against the Dark Arts taught by Professor Quirrel, Astrology taught by Professor Aurelia Sinistra, Herbology taught by Professor Sprout, Broomology taught by Professor Rolanda Hoch, Care of Magical Creatures taught by Professor Mylor Silvanus and Potions taught by Professor Snape (who seems to really detest Harry).
Later, when reading the Daily Prophet, Harry reads up more on the Gringotts break-in, and learns that it had happened on the same day that he had visited, and the vault the robber targeted was the same one that Hagrid had retrieved the mysterious object from.
Throughout their classes, Harry, Ron and Hippolyta find Draco to be quite obstructive to their lessons.
It comes to a point that Tom-John, as well as Harry’s Gryffynhart classmates, plan for a prank on the Slythryus, and invite Harry along.
Wanting to get even with Malfeus, Harry sneaks out after curfew with them, only for a set of prefects to be searching the area (seemingly having been tipped off about the upcoming prank). Harry tries his utmost to avoid detection, when he encounters Ron and Hippolyta, who are out of their dormitories as well, trying to dissuade Harry from getting into trouble. Trying to sneak back, an near-encounter with Scorpia Spinx leads them to hide behind Door 13151820, where they find themselves before a three-headed dog.
Escaping, Hippolyta notices that the dog was standing on top of a trap door, meaning it was guarding something.
The next day, during a Broomology class, they are taken to their very first flying lesson, with Harry proving to be a natural at the broom.
But after an accident leading to Hoch taking a couple of students to the hospital wing and ordering them to stay on the ground, Malfeus takes the Remembrall of one of the students and flies around with it, only for Harry to go after him (despite Hippolyta’s protests).
When Malfeus throws it, Harry manages to catch it spectacularly and land safely.
Afterwards, Professor Scrimwick takes Harry aside and takes him to Bill Hedgeley (captain of the Gryffynhart Quaddach Team), making him the new seeker of the Gryffynhart Quaddach Team (despite first years not being allowed to do so).
After receiving a Nimbus 2000 broomstick, Harry is introduced to the rules and basics of Quaddach as well as being introduced to the Gryffynhart Quaddach team, comprised of Olivia Wood, Catrìona Peregrine, Hannah Spinnet, Tom Puckle and John Puckle.
In Charms, Scrimwick teaches his students the Wingardium Leviosa spell, and when Hippolyta shows up Ron and Draco at doing it better than them, Draco and Scorpia utter such nasty comments afterwards that Hippolyta runs off in tears.
At the Halloween feast, Harry and Ron realise that Hippolyta is absent and head off to go and comfort her, escaping from Draco’s queries when Scorpia causes a commotion.
On their way to find Hippolyta, Harry and Ron suddenly come across a thirteen-foot troll in the corridors, who pursues them.
Managing to find Hippolyta, they are then trapped in a bathroom, and work together to take down the troll. Pretty soon, a solid friendship forms between Harry, Ron and Hippolyta.
Harry then has his first Quaddach match, Gryffynhart vs Slythryus, where Harry manages to win the match despite all the odds.
Thus, Harry becomes quite popular and starts basking in the attention for quite a while, much to the concern of Ron and Hippolyta.
While spending his Christmas at Hogwarts, Harry receives presents (a flute from Hagrid, a 50 pence coin from the Parkinsons, a Chocolate Bird Card from Hippolyta, a knitted jumper from Ron’s mother and an Invisibility Cloak with an anonymous note telling him that the cloak once belonged to Harry's father and to "use it well”).
Harry ventures out with his Gryffynhart friends on a late-night trek, only to encounter the Mirror of Erised, which shows him his dead parents George and Lily.
Over the coming days, Harry continues visiting, much to the concern of Ron and Hippolyta (who don’t see his parents but see different things).
It is only when Dumbledore visits, after explaining the mirror and what it does, that Harry is convinced to not go looking for it further as it will be moved to a new location soon, and that many people have completely wasted their entire lives, looking before the mirror at “a desire that is completely untouchable” and that while Harry may consider it a blessing to see his parents, “it can be a terrible curse for those wishing something that is impossible”. When Harry asks what Dumbledore sees in the mirror, all the headmaster says, with a sad smile, is himself “holding a pair of socks”.
On his way back to the common room, Harry spots a cloaked figure in the corridors, approaching Door 13151820 when the figure realises he is not alone. Harry is able to escape detection narrowly, but not before noticing Snape lurking around as well.
During the Gryffynhart vs Corvidious match, the match goes well, until Harry suddenly finds his broom jerking around uncontrollably.
Noticing Snape muttering under his breath whilst staring at Harry, Ron reckons that he’s trying to utter a curse to kill Harry, and Hippolyta goes to help. While setting Snape’s cloak on fire, she accidentally knocks over Quirrel.
With the curse broken, Harry wins the match in the knick of time.
Later that evening, while on a late night trek with Ron and Hippolyta, spots Snape speaking to Quirrel of the Philosopher’s Stone.
They visit Hagrid in his hut and try to tell him of all this (namely that Snape seeks to get the Stone by forcing Quirrel to help him, and that Snape tried to kill Harry), only for Hagrid to refuse to believe this and ask why Snape would try to kill Harry. Harry tells Hagrid about Snape getting injured by the dog in the third-floor corridor (having noticed this after Halloween). Hagrid involuntarily reveals that the three-headed dog, Fluffy, is his, and that what the dog is guarding is a secret known only to Albus Dumbledore and a man named Nicolas Flamel.
Later, Harry notices that he read Nicolas Flamel on Hippolyta’s Chocolate Bird Card that she gave him for Christmas, which then reminds Hippolyta that she had read the name in a book she had picked up in the library a while ago.
So, Harry, Ron and Hippolyta discover that Flamel is a famous alchemist, who created the Philosopher’s Stone, which has the powers to turn any kind of metals into gold as well as produce the Elixir of Life, a potion that can make the drinker immortal.
After visiting Hagrid and learning about who is defending the Stone (learning that the three-headed dog, Fluffy, is one of them), Harry, Ron and Hippolyta then discover that Hagrid has a dragon egg, which hatches to reveal a baby Romanian Ridgeback who Hagrid names Norbert.
Hagrid becomes fixated on looking after Norbert, even when he starts growing and becoming more ferocious, to the point that Ron gets bitten by Norbert and Hippolyta’s hair gets set on fire.
Left with no choice after they are sent to the hospital wing (despite their protestations), Harry calls upon Bill for help, who arranges for some dragon keepers to take possession of the dragon, as well as Nevil, Tom-John and the others for help smuggling Norbert to the tallest tower in order for the dragon keepers to arrive and take the dragon.
Although successful, the alarm is raised and Harry along with Nevil, is caught by Argus Filch.
Taken to Professor Scrimwick, where Draco and Scorpia is also, Scrimwick lectures the four of them, and has 50 points taken from their houses each, with a detection given.
After the detention and the reduction in house points, Harry notes that Gryffynhart starts treating him with disdain, thus he starts spending more time with Ron and Hippolyta. Then, one day, they overhear Quirrel sounding as if he is being threatened. Convinced that Snape intends on stealing the Stone soon, Hippolyta suggests going to Dumbledore, but Harry refuses, due to lack of proof.
Then, Harry receives word that his detention will begin at eleven in the evening. Filch takes Harry, Nevil, Draco and Scorpia down to the Dark Forest, located on an adjacent island to Hogwarts, where they are to assist Hagrid and Professor Silvanus in their task in finding out who’s been attacking and killing unicorns for the past month.
They split up, with Hagrid taking Harry and Scorpia, while Silvanus takes Draco and Nevil with him. After questioning centaurs about the unicorn killings, and finding out little from them, red sparks are seen firing in the air, to which Hagrid, Harry and Scorpia head over to Professor Silvanus, only to find that Draco deliberately startled Nevil into sending the sparks. Hagrid then has Draco and Harry go with Professor Silvanus, while Scorpia and Nevil come with him.
Later, after enduring Draco whinging and complaining about how “his father will hear about this”, red sparks are fired up, to which they all rush to, only for Harry and Draco to get separated.
Harry then finds the dead unicorn, along with a cloaked figure drinking it’s blood.
Immediately, the figure pursues Harry, only to be saved in the nick of time by a centaur named Bower who tells Harry that unicorn blood can keep you alive, even if you are an inch from death, but results in “a cursed life” in the process. He then reveals that the person who was drinking it was doing so to remain alive until they were able to drink the Elixir of Life and wants the Stone. He also asks Harry if he would not know anyone who has been waiting for years to regain power and Harry realises that the mysterious figure was a weakened but still alive Voldemort.
Later, after Bower sends a flaming arrow for Hagrid and the others, before bidding farewell and departing after ensuring Harry is safe, Harry speaks with Ron and Hippolyta in the morning, telling them of what happened in the Dark Forest.
Harry, Ron and Hippolyta manage to barely pass through their exams, due to Draco being an impediment to their progress.
After their Care of Magical Creatures exam, Professor Silvanus is asked afterwards by Scorpia, in which music can put animals to sleep, for one of her pets isn't sleeping very well.
Then, when speaking to Hagrid about the stranger who had given him the egg, Harry realises (after remembering Scorpia asking about certain music putting animals to sleep) that the stranger has gotten crucial information on how to get past Fluffy. So, the three of them head to find Professor Dumbledore, only for Professor Minerva to state that Dumbledore has been called away for an urgent meeting at the Ministry and will not be back until tomorrow morning. Despite revealing that they know about the Stone, Minerva insists no one could steal the Stone as “it’s too well protected”.
With the realisation that Snape is going to steal the Stone tonight, Harry, Ron and Hippolyta plan on going to get it themselves before he can. So, Harry sneaks out, past his Gryffynhart classmates via the Invisibility Cloak, while getting Ron and Hippolyta outside their common rooms, only to be confronted by Nevil, who has summoned Percy. Despite their attempts, Hippolyta curses them in a Full Body-Bind Curse.
After sneaking past Peeves with an impression of the Bloody Baron, the trio enter Door 13151820, where they spot a harp being played.
When it stops, Harry quickly uses the the flute from Hagrid given to him on Christmas to keep Fluffy asleep. Then they open the trapdoor to reveal steps towards a garden maze where the various deadly plants, including the Devil’s Snare, almost kill them, before Hippolyta gets them free.
Then, after passing through a room with a dead mountain troll, the trio end up in an empty chamber, with a door with two locks. They notice two keys, one silver key on a mounting, one gold key on the roof. When Ron uses the silver key, the room suddenly floods via a rainstorm (which Hippolyta recognises as a Rainstorm Charm), and it becomes a struggle as they reach the golden key. They nearly drown until Harry manages to unlock the door with it, to which they enter the next room containing a giant chessboard for a game of Wizard’s Chess. Ron engineers their win, at the cost of sacrificing himself in order to expose the King and allowing a Checkmate.
Then, after Hippolyta solves Professor Snape’s potion riddle, Harry goes on alone.
Harry arrives at the final room, containing the Mirror of Erised, only to find to his surprise, Quirrel is there.
After learning that Snape was actually protecting Harry, in spite of hating Harry due to his hatred for his father, and that Quirrel had actually been the one trying to kill him and steal the Stone, Harry learns that Quirrel is serving Voldemort.
Quirrel asks how to get the stone, only for an voice to tell him to use Harry. Told to look into the mirror, Harry spots his reflection pull the Stone out of his pocket and put it back in, and Harry feels it drop into his own pocket.
After being asked on what he sees, Harry tells him that he sees his parents again, just like last time, only for Quirrel to angrily get more insistent, believing that Harry lies.
However, the voice appears once again and asks to speak with Harry directly. Despite his reluctance, Quirrel unwraps his turban to reveal, much to Harry’s shock, another face where the back of Quirrell's head should be.
Realising that Harry now has the Stone, Voldemort tries to get Harry to give him the Stone, by tempting him to give back Harry’s parents and allowing them to “live forever”, but Harry refuses.
Quirrel prevents Harry from escaping by conjuring up flames in the room, and then ropes.
Harry is helpless, struggling to get free, when Quirrel prepares to kill him, only for the contact with Harry’s skin to start burning Quirrel. Taking advantage of this to get free, Harry manages to grab at Quirrel’s arm and hold on with the blinding pain in his head building, until he blacks out.
Waking up in the hospital ring, Dumbledore tells Harry that Quirrel did not survive, for Voldemort left him to die, and that the Stone has been destroyed.
Despite this, Dumbledore is certain Voldemort will find another way to come back, and explains that the reason why Quirrel could not touch Harry was because Harry's mother had died to save him, protecting him with her love. Harry also told Dumbledore about what Quirrell mentioned to him earlier regarding Snape hating Harry due to hatred for his father. Dumbledore responds that Snape was only grudgingly protecting Harry this year to pay off a debt he owed due to George Fletcher having saved his life during their Hogwarts years.
Receiving a visit from his Gryffynhart classmates, Harry realises he is looking forward to Ron and Hippolyta more than the rest of his house, and is elated when he is visited by them and Hagrid (who gives him a photo album of his family as a gift).
Then, next week, comes the final Quaddach match between Gryffynhart vs Burleighnohn, Harry and his team perform a great game, but in an act of humbleness, Harry deliberately lets Burleighnohn’s seeker catch the Snitch, allowing Burleighnohn to win the Inter-House Quaddach Cup for the first time in 100 years, with Gryffynhart second place.
Then, at the end of the term feast, in which Slythryus is in the lead of the House Cup, Dumbledore awards some last minute points due to recent events, with Harry, Ron, Hippolyta receiving 50 house points each, while Nevil and Percy 10 more points, ensuring that Slythryus, who are seemingly in the lead, only to drop down, and Gryffynhart to gain the lead (with Burleighnohn 2nd, Corvidious 3rd) and become the winners of the House Cup.
Soon, Harry, Ron and Hippolyta all take the Hogwarts Express back for the Muggle world, and upon arriving back at King’s Cross, all say their goodbyes before heading home.
In the film, several minor characters have been removed (namely Janus Malfeus, due to an agreement that he could appear in the second film, where he has more prominence), whilst the book’s first chapter told from Vernon Parkinson’s viewpoint, is absent from the film as Parker and Kloves felt it “slowed the film down”. Harry’s attempts at getting the letters are reduced to a montage, while after Vernon declares they are moving, the scene immediately cuts straight to the disused home on a rock in the sea, where Harry, before going to bed, simply says that Vernon should just let him read the letter, only for Vernon to snap angrily back at him and tell him to go to bed.
Hagrid’s explanation about the death of his parents to Harry is moved, from the disused home on the rock in the sea, to after they shop at Diagon Alley. Harry’s first encounter with Draco at the Longbottom Cauldrons shop in Diagon Alley is removed (with the first meeting between Harry and Draco instead taking place on the Hogwarts Express), while following his trip to Diagon Alley, the scene immediately cuts straight to the Parkinsons dropping Harry off at King’s Cross.
The Sorting Ceremony is done out of order (rather than alphabetically in the novel) and shortened down, with only Harry, Ron, Hippolyta, Draco, Scorpia, Nevil, Pansy, Shane and Gary shown.
The Hogwarts lessons are condensed down into a montage, with only Charms, Broomology and Potions shown extensively.
The Quaddach matches are condensed, with the Gryffynhart and Slythryus match and the Gryffynhart and Corvidious match both combined into one match, while the Gryffynhart and Burleighnohn match is shortened to have Harry in pursuit of the Golden Snitch, only to deliberately allow Burleighnohn’s seeker catch the snitch.
Instead of Harry organising many of his Gryffynhart classmates to take Norbert away by hand for a pickup and thus getting caught by Filch, Harry, Ron, Hippolyta and Draco are put in detention after being spotted by Draco at Hagrid’s hut after hours. Scrimwick is much harsher and takes away 100 house points each, still meaning Harry’s popularity with Gryffynhart falls significantly.
The confrontation with Nevil and Percy is different in that Harry is cornered at the entrance to Gryffynhart Keep, only for Ron and Hippolyta to surprise them with the Full Body-Bind Curse.
The Philosopher Stone defenses are different: Instead of effortlessly enchanting Fluffy to sleep, the harp suddenly stops after they open the trapdoor and Fluffy awakes (Harry hasn’t been given a flute for Christmas, thus he doesn’t use it), prompting Ron, Harry and Hippolyta to make a quick getaway. The garden maze is omitted, instead, the trio land on the Devil’s Snare directly, in which Hippolyta’s directions were to relax, after which the plant would release Harry and Ron. However, Ron, being the last one trapped, and being afraid, couldn't calm himself down enough, prompting Hermione to cast the Fire-Making Spell.
After passing the knocked out troll, the Rainstorm Room is shortened for time. And while the Chessboard scene was fully shot, it was heavily trimmed in the final cut to reduce the movie’s running time, while at the end, is Snape’s potion riddle, which Hippolyta solves easily to allow Harry to cross an empty chasm into the next room.
The epilogue in which Harry, Ron and Hippolyta hug before departing for their families at King’s Cross is instead omitted, and the film ends, with the Hogwarts Express departing Hogsbury station, while Harry in his cabin, looks out of the window with a smile, with Hogwarts reflected in the window.
Release, Reception and Legacy:
The world premier took place at Odeon Leicester Square in London on the 10th of November, 2001, while officially releasing on the 14th of November in the UK, with the film released on the 20th in the US and Canada.
A Touch of Magic, became a critical and commercial success, grossing up to around $972 million at the worldwide box office, before reaching $1 billion on subsequent re-releases.
The Harry Fletcher films became one of Hollywood’s major “tent-pole” blockbusters, akin to James Bond, Star Wars and Indiana Jones, the Marvel Movie Universe, Jurassic Park, and later, the DC Cinematic Universe, Red Sails, Transformers and the Lord of the Rings films (with the first one, Fellowship of the Ring, releasing in the same year).
Harry Fletcher would lead the way in the “Second British Invasion”, and prompt more adaptations of Terry Pratchett’s work after an increase in popularity for his older Discworld adaptations, not to mention that along with Columbia’s The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings, fantasy adaptations for the big screen (as well as the small screen) proved very viable and profitable.
After the release of Dragonlance:The Legacy of Raistlin in 2000, Disney continued on with somewhat modest sequels, which led to a live-action TV series by Ted Raimi, while starting in 2006, Universal released a film series based on the Chronicles of Narnia and Warner Bros. released the How to Train an Dragon films[43] in 2008. And that’s the first novel/first film done!
Next week, we will be covering the next one in the series, 1998’s The Heir of Salazar: A Harry Fletcher Story, which it’s film adaptation was released in theatres in 2002, this time directed by Chris Columbus. But until then, stay tuned for tomorrow’s post, where we give extensive coverage to Guillermo del Toro’s adaptation of Naomi Novik’s Temeraire, on Orion+[44].
[1] In OTL, Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (or the Sorcerer’s Stone for you Americans out there) was first published in the UK on 26th June 1997.
[2] OTL’s Heyday Films, which was initially known as Cherubs.
[3] In OTL, David Heyman did plan on producing a film based on The Ogre Downstairs but this never came through.
[4] As described by the WestCOT post, Disney created a partnership with Pearson PLC to add a Harry Fletcher land, so I took it to mean that Pearson PLC generally holds the rights to do Harry Fletcher theme parks in the UK, while Disney goes into a partnership with Pearson PLC to add the Wizarding World of Harry Fletcher or gains the licence to do Wizarding World of Harry Fletcher abroad, as long as it is in partnership with Pearson PLC and vetted by Jo Rowling.
[5] Yes, Terry Gilliam, Ron Howard, Jonathan Demme, Mike Newell (who would get to direct Goblet of Fire), Alan Parker, Wolfgang Petersen, Rob Reiner, Ivan Reitman, Tim Robbins, Brad Silberling, M. Night Shyamalan and Peter Weir were all considered to direct the first film, whilst Frank Oz was offered to direct Chamber of Secrets but had no interest in it. Petersen and Reiner had pulled out of the running of the first film, while Ron Howard had been offered but had just directed How the Grinch Stole Christmas and didn't want to jump right into another difficult and expensive fantasy movie, before the choices came down to Silberling, Columbus, Parker and Gilliam. Even though Gilliam was Rowling’s first choice of director, Warner Bros. instead chose Columbus, and the rest is history.
[6] With butterflies affecting the 1996 film, Penguin Pictures adapts the novel and has Christopher Columbus direct, starring Emma Watson as the titular character, with Joely Richardson as Miss Honey, Richard Griffiths as Mr Wormwood, Helena Bonham Carter as Mrs Wormwood and Pam Ferris as Miss Trunchbull.
[7] In OTL, Rowling would not be credited as a producer until both Deathly Hallows movies.
[8] Fictional.
[9] Auditioned for Ron Weasley in OTL.
[10] Auditioned for Harry Potter in OTL. Later, he would be cast as Peter Pevensie in The Chronicles of Narnia films.
[11] Unlike in OTL, in which Tom Felton auditioned for Harry Potter. To think, Tom Felton almost ending up as Harry Potter!
[12] TTL’s Seamus Finnigan. In the Harry Fletcher series, Shane Finnigan is in Corvidious.
[13] TTL’s Dean Thomas. In the Harry Fletcher series, Gary Samuels is in Burleighnohn.
[14] Juno Temple auditioned to play Luna Lovegood in Order of the Phoenix but lost out to Evanna Lynch.
[15] True as per OTL. Sean Connery passed on Dumbledore, along with passing on Gandalf and Morpheus, while Patrick McGoohan was in ill health at the time. Peter O'Toole was actually requested by Richard Harris' family to portray Dumbledore after Richard Harris' death, but the studio feared that O'Toole would also die before the series was completed, so they rejected the idea.
And with Richard Harris being busy with Gandalf means he is unable to portray the role of Dumbledore for the first two films, I did consider Christopher Lee (and strongly considered Peter O'Toole), but wanted another actor to have the chance, and thus I chose Ian Richardson as I liked that idea a bit more. And yes, Ian Richardson’s Dumbledore will utter, “You may very well think that, but I couldn’t possibly comment”.
[16] Maggie Smith and Robbie Coltrane were Rowling’s favourites for McGonagall and Hagrid in OTL so no reason why that should be different here, whilst Miriam Margolyes and Alan Rickman were her favourites for Sprout and Snape due to the Terry Pratchett’s Discworld adaptations meaning she could see the two of them as Sprout and Snape.
[17] Tim Roth was initially cast as Snape in OTL, but at the same time, was filming Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes, so had to choose one or the other. And David Thewlis did audition for Quirrell but lost out to Ian Hart in OTL.
[18] Mike Edmonds, Deep Roy, Kiran Shah portrayed Goblins in the first film (albeit uncredited).
[19] Rik Mayall was indeed cast as Peeves, but his scenes were cut from the first film in OTL. In here, Peeves makes the odd appearance every now and again in the background, until when the trio sneak to the Philosopher’s Stone, and Harry makes an impersonation of the Bloody Lord, to keep him away.
[20] Rowling was offered to play as Lily Potter in the first movie in OTL, but she declined as she felt she was “not a good actress”. Here instead, given that I have plans for her as a guest star on Too Late with Miss Piggy (yes, I’m planning out a complete guest star list for that), I feel maybe she would have been more comfortable, doing a short cameo like I described here.
[21] Danielle Taylor (who later became Danielle Tabor) portrayed Angelina Johnson in the first three films before being replaced by Tiana Benjamin in the fourth film, before returning to portray her for the Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey ride from The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
[22] In OTL, Crabbe and Goyle actors Jamie Waylett and Josh Herdman, were both considered for the role of Dudley Dursley, but lost out to Harry Melling, so I reckoned Harry Melling would be ideal for the reverse instead, cast as Vincent Crabbe’s counterpart in TTL.
[23] True as per OTL! And I’m pretty sure that in TTL, there would have been people begging to change the names of the houses, given that during development of the first Thor film, people were actually concerned about pronouncing Mjolnir correctly.
[24] Oh, yes. True story. In OTL, Bruce Springsteen written a ballad after reading the Harry Potter novels “I'll Stand By You” and made it available for the first film, only for Rowling’s contractual stipulation that no commercial songs of any type be used in the Harry Potter film series to put a damper on any such thing. It wouldn’t be until 2019’s Blinded by the Light film, that the song would see the light of day.
[25] With the Harry Fletcher films done by Penguin Pictures instead of Warner Bros., none of their filming is done at Leavesden Film Studios, so say goodbye to Warner Bros. Studio Tour London – The Making of Harry Potter (an alternate attraction will have to be established instead). On the other hand, they have the 007 Studio available!
[26] Taw Valley was almost chosen to become the Hogwarts Express in OTL but was rejected by Chris Columbus for she looked “too modern”, a reasonable explanation as Taw Valley was built in the 40s and rebuilt to modern standards in the late 50s, whilst Olton Hall (which has lead to the joke of “...the Hall that thinks it's a Castle”, due to the Hall class being similar to the earlier Castle class) had been built in the 1930s and hadn’t been changed since then.
[27] Instead of the village of Hogsmeade, Hogsbury is instead a town.
[28] Gloucester Cathedral, Durham Cathedral, Alnwick Castle, and the University of Oxford were used for filming scenes of Hogwarts, whilst I added the University of Cambridge, as well as Loch Duich, replacing OTL’s Loch Shiel, while Burnham Beeches and Black Park would be on hand to use to film scenes in the Dark Forest, due to their proximity to Pinewood.
[29] True!
[30] True as per OTL.
[31] Rowling will recommend Trevor Jones ITTL due to his work on The Dark Crystal films and on The Dark Crystal prequel series.
[32] Fictional song.
[33] The choice of Lavender as the name for the daughter of the Parkinsons is deliberate as Lily and Petunia are flowers, and thus since OTL’s Lavender Brown is not in Harry Fletcher, it allowed me to use the name of Lavender for another character.
[34] Originally, Rowling planned to introduce the character of Rita Skeeter (who was known as Bridget) in Philosopher’s Stone, trying to interview Harry Potter in the Leaky Cauldron on his 11th birthday, and had appeared on the first draft, only for Rowling to cut the character for later, for Harry was taking too long to get to Diagon Alley and Rowling wanted such a character to appear later when Harry’s fame starts oppressing him, by at which point, Rowling’s experiences with journalists she encountered since her fame influenced Rita Skeeter. Here, Bridget Teller appears in a brief role, but is much warmer and understanding, when Hagrid tells her to leave Harry alone, thus she’s essentially a different character from Skeeter. Stay tuned for the 4th novel, when that comes!
[35] According to Rowling, the choice of Platform Nine and Three-Quarters was, in her own words, one that “presented itself without much conscious thought, and I liked it so much that I took it at once”. This makes the decision butterfly-prone ITTL, and given that 7 is a prominent number that Rowling liked to use, I felt that Platform 9/7 (pronounced “Nine Seven”) makes it just as unique as Platform 9¾.
[36] Given the huge amount of students that travel to Hogwarts, I felt that the most logical explanation for how all the students fit into the carriages was that the carriages are actually charmed to be larger inside than outside. It wouldn't be out of place for Rowling to do this, since in OTL, she had the Weasleys borrow a tent with a similar charm for the Quidditch World Cup in Goblet of Fire (which was then used in the Horcrux hunt in the seventh book).
[37] 13151820 are numbers on the alphabet, spelling out Mort, a reference to how the door is “out of bounds to anyone who does not wish to die a painful death”, and given that Mort means death, well, makes sense, doesn’t it?
[38] Bill Hedgeley, or William “Bill” Richard Hedgeley, is a combination of Oliver Wood character in Philosopher’s Stone and Charlie Weasley (his role in working with dragons).
[39] Puckle was originally Hermione’s surname, only for Rowling to find that the name did not fit her.
[40] Since Geekhis Khan did not mention the Head of Gryffynhart House in his post about Harry Fletcher (with TTL’s Professor McGonagall being the head of TTL’s Ravenclaw House), I took it upon myself to create one. Leonidas invokes the Spartan King as well as Leo coming from the Greek word for Lion while his surname is a combination of the Scottish surname Scrimgeour (which is believed to probably mean "skirmish", from the French escrimeur, meaning "swordsman”) and wick (the advice in charms “swish and flick”), basically an strange combination of Rufus Scrimgeour and Filius Flitwick.
[41] This brief appearance in the novel will be referenced in future, as around the time in which Janus used his influence to get Draco into Harry, Ron and Hippolyta’s study group.
[42] TTL’s equivalent to Gryffindor Tower, the entrance is still concealed by the portrait of The Fat Lady, who requires a password, but with two security additions: two stone lions flanking the portrait, who would roar loudly if anyone was trying to intrude or force entry.
[43] TTL’s equivalent to How to Train Your Dragon.
[44] A Direct Viewing service owned and operated by Orion Pictures.
Edit: The HBO Dune adaptation mention had to be removed, due to @Nathanoraptor making me aware that he was already working on a guest post on Dune (so sorry!). And thus, a special thanks to @Nathanoraptor for his suggestion as a replacement: Isaac Asimov's Foundation.
Beloved comedian and actor John Candy recently announced that he had purchased the rights to the sketch comedy series that gave him his start, SCTV, and had begun developing a revival series for Triad. This new take on the show is set to air on the Fourth of July. Some critics of the proposed reboot have accused this of being a vanity project for John Candy, but Candy himself has denied this.
“I'm not going to be on the show and I'm not writing for it, I'm just going to be a showrunner for it. I wanted to give some new opportunities for up and coming comedians.” Candy told Entertainment Weekly. He also made sure to clarify that this new iteration does not solely focus on the Toronto Second City, also including comedians who have appeared in Chicago's Second City, with production being based out of the Windy City. “Chicago’s always been kind of a second home for me, so I figured I'd take the opportunity to give the comedy scene there a little love.”
Despite this, Candy has been very hands-on with the production of the show, having reportedly met with every potential writer and star personally. Candy has reportedly had final say on choosing the new cast as well.
Candy’s longtime friend Rick Moranis, who of course worked on the original show with Candy has stated that he's had a first hand look at production on this revival and believes that can attest that Candy is “fully committed to delivering a quality product.”
When asked how his new series will fare against SNL, Candy was optimistic, telling US Weekly, “Hey, we did pretty good the first time around didn't we?” Later adding, “We all want to be as big as Lorne is, and ya know, kick his butt a little[1]. I feel like he's up for a challenge.”
In anticipation of the revival, Triad has announced a planned marathon of the original series in August. Candy's revival will have essentially the same format as the original series, and the cast, while ranging widely in terms of notability, is composed entirely of up-and-comers with very eclectic backgrounds.
Along with John Candy's announcement of the revival came the announcement of the cast which consists of the following people: Ryan Reynolds, Alan Tudyk [2], Ivana Miličević[3], Bert Kreischer[4], Will Sasso, Ike Barinholtz, Alex Borstein, Michael McDonald, Debra Wilson, Stephnie Weir[5], Trevor Moore, John Pinette, Amy Poehler[6], Lisa Landry, Derek Mears[7], Sofía Vergara[8], Randall Park, Steve Byrne, Ron Funches, Will Arnett, Cobie Smulders, Hannibal Burres, Mohammed Amer, Dave Sheridan, Amy Hill, and Torrie Wilson[9].
At twenty-six initial members, this revival of SCTV boasts a much larger and more diverse cast than its predecessor and while many may argue that the cast is overcrowded, Candy himself argues that the large ensemble helps explore the comedic potential in a much broader way.
“I sat all these guys down and told them to pitch ideas for sketches, nothing was off the table. It was nothing short of magic watching these kids just bounce ideas of what they thought was funny of each other.” Candy excitedly spoke of his cast.
In addition to Candy's input, the show's writing team includes former writers for In Living Color, David Salzman and Fax Bahr, as well as up and coming comedy writers Devon Shepard, John Crane and Dahéli Hall[10]. While Candy's involvement and enthusiasm are undeniable, some skeptics question whether the revival can capture the same magic as the original without the familiar faces of the original cast. However, with a blend of seasoned talent and fresh comedic voices, this reboot has the potential to carve out its own unique place in the comedy landscape.
Several of the new cast members have expressed excitement and gratitude for the opportunity to be part of the SCTV revival. Ryan Reynolds, a Canadian comic and actor who is a longtime fan of Candy's work, commented, "Joining the SCTV family feels like a dream come true. I grew up watching the original series, and to now be a part of its legacy is truly an honor.”
Amy Poehler, a founding member of the Upright Citizens Brigade, also shared her thoughts, "SCTV has a special place in comedy history, and I'm honored to be part of its revival.”
Lorne Michaels, the main driving force of SNL for many years, has said he welcomes the competition, telling reporters, “Bring it on.” When asked if he had anything he'd like to say to Candy. “When SNL has competitors we tend to make some of our best stuff. We have to up our game so the audience sticks around, but we're always up for the challenge.”
Time will tell whether Candy's merry band of misfits will be able to recapture the magic of SCTV's heyday and compete with the juggernaut that is SNL. That said, with a cast of interesting newcomers and Candy's ever guiding presence this revival does have interesting potential that will likely bring in viewers.
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SCTV Revival: A Worthy Successor That's Big on Heart and Laughs
By Bill Chase, Entertainment Weekly,
July 6th, 2005
(Image Source: Wikipedia)
John Candy's revival of SCTV premiered two days ago to glowing reviews and already seems to be a ratings hit with audiences. Despite complaints of an overstuffed cast, the show managed to deliver a delightful mix of nostalgia and fresh comedic energy. With John Candy's guiding hand and the diverse talents of the new cast, the revival has struck a chord with viewers, offering a blend of classic sketch comedy and contemporary humor.
The main cast managed to all have phenomenal chemistry with each other, with everyone getting a chance to shine during the sketches, which is no small feat considering the amount of cast members. The show first opens with an intro that humorously implies that this new cast of SCTV are actually the children of people who were shown throwing their TV's out the windows in the intro to the original series.
The first sketch is also a strong one, taking aim at men's rights groups, where several cast members hold fake events for members of these groups, that essentially designed to trick hyper-sexist individuals into going into therapy. Amy Poehler and Dave Sheridan prove to be great anchors for the sketch, with Sheridan simultaneously pulling off the macho tough guy that men's rights groups stereotypically respect while also working as an incredibly patient therapist. Meanwhile Poehler is a treat as the woman who has to feed Sheridan lines to help keep the ruse up.
Much like the original series, this revival series is presents it's sketches through the framing device of being a compendium of programming seen on the station throughout its broadcast day. A given episode could contain SCTV news broadcasts, sitcoms, dramas, movies, talk shows, children's shows, advertising send-ups hawking fictitious services and products, and game shows.
The sole exception to this being the second sketch of the night. One that seemingly pokes fun at the format of SNL. Entitled "Why We Won't Have Hosts" the show demonstrates four hypothetical hosts (played by Alan Tudyk, Trevor Moore, Ivana Miličević, and Alex Borstein) which demonstrate all the ways a celebrity host could go wrong, all of which seem to parody specific bad episodes of SNL taken to with the circumstances of what made those episodes terrible taken up to eleven. Tudyk is clearly Milton Berle, Moore is Frank Zappa, Miličević is Louise Lasser and Borstein is Nancy Kerrigan.
One of the standout moments of the night is a commercial parody for a fictional product called "Reality Check," a pill that promises to make people confront their delusions and face reality head-on. The commercial escalates into hilariously absurd scenarios as various characters take the pill and experience increasingly bizarre revelations that often go beyond them just realizing they're in the wrong during the hypothetical situation.
Of course, there was also the hilarious “Why Me?” Sketch which spoofs the chosen one trope often shown in media, with guys played by Alan Tudyk, Torrie Wilson, Debra Wilson, Will Sasso and Steve Byrne being told they are prophesied chosen ones from different entities, and immediately rejecting their quests on for various comedic reasons.
The weakest sketch of the night would probably be the “Punk Donny Osmond”, an obvious parody of the recently released Rolling Stone documentary on Karen Carpenter[11]. The whole joke of the sketch is that it features other acts that were known to be easy listening suddenly shifting into punk starting of course, with Donny Osmond.
When approached for comment, Lorne Michaels, “Tonight, Candy and his merry band of misfits showed they're here to play ball. Well, let's see how long they can keep this up.” Meanwhile former cast member Eugene Levy has also sung praises of the show, saying, "I was skeptical, if only because I thought John overstuffed the cast, but honestly, I think everyone had a part to play in making this one of the funniest hours of television I've seen."
This first outing showcases comedic potential and sets a promising tone for the rest of the series. John Candy's vision for the revival seems to have paid off, as the show successfully combines elements of the original SCTV with fresh perspectives from the new cast. With its witty sketches, talented ensemble, and clever writing, the SCTV revival appears to be a worthy successor to its iconic predecessor. As audiences eagerly tune in to see what comedic delights the show has in store, it's clear that SCTV is back and ready to reclaim its place in the pantheon of sketch comedy greatness.
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[1] This is loosely based on a quote Ted Turner said about his vision for WCW.
[2] Alan Tudyk was at one point a stand up comedian before a really bad incident with a heckler that never ITTL due to butterflies. Since he wasn't in TTL's version of Firefly, this ends up being his big break.
[3] Her Wikipedia page at one point said she was a stand-up comedian, so I decided to include her here.
[4] For the record, no I didn't put Ryan Reynolds and the man who inspired Van Wilder in the same cast on purpose.
[5] There is an equivalent to MadTV called The Mad Show but since that show format (according to @Plateosaurus ) is actually closer to the format of Cartoon Network’s MAD or even actual Mad Magazine, I figured I'd have some of the cast work here instead.
[6] Since her place on SNL was essentially taken by Stephanie Courtney ITTL, I have it so this show leads to Poehler getting her big break.
[7] Despite working as a stunt performer, Derek Mears actually has a background in improv comedy.
[8] Third wave butterflies result in Vergara getting her first film role via a movie that Candy was in. As a result, Candy ends up being impressed by her comedic timing, and she's approached her to be part of the cast.
[9] Wilson's presence here is admittedly a replacement for someone else, but since her entire wrestling career is essentially butterfly bait, and she originally planned to be an actress, I feel like this is plausible.
[10] Much like the cast, a few of MadTV’s OTL writer's end up here instead.
[11] Just figured I'd throw in a reference to the TLIAW that @Geekhis Khan is doing.
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